Fix Me
by June.Louise
Summary: AU. SS. Please Read & Review! Complete.
1. Chapter 1

_Okay, so I know that I should focuse on my other stories. But I just wrote this for fun and thought I'd post it._

_It's kind of different from my other stories. Please tell me your thoughts!_

What had happened?

Summer couldn't really understand what had gone wrong but everything had; she was sure of that. Maybe she'd ignored too many things and maybe her issues just had grown without ever being taken cared of.

All her life things had been difficult and it had felt like she'd always had the world against her. Maybe she really had; maybe God hated her or something. What made things so hard all the time Summer didn't know; it was impossible to know. But it had to be something.

Because every time she tried for _something_ or every time she got close to _somebody_ it ended with her disappointing people and feel like she wasn't worth a thing. And she'd now found that she'd been right all along. She wasn't worth a thing.

Or at least she wasn't worth being happy. And a life without happiness or joy, with only people against you (you alone!), couldn't possibly be worth living.

Why would she fight any longer? Summer had already struggled through her life this far, for twenty three whole years. She'd tried it and it was no fun.

In high school things had been awful and all Summer wanted then was to grow up and move from the crappy place she'd lived at together with the mom who'd never wanted her and the stepfather who only cared about himself. So, Summer moved to Los Angeles straight after high school, in hope to find a job and a place to stay at.

At first things hadn't been very good. She ended up sharing a tiny apartment with a girl who worked nights. The place was a mess and not just once Summer had to come home and find the door opened and the money gone.

So at that time, Summer had worked really hard to find a better place. She'd even fallowed her room mate a few times and made some money. It wasn't like she wanted to, but without any money she'd have to stay or even worse, move back.

The time she'd been her happiest must have been as she moved into the new apartment, still not very nice but okay and most importantly without any strange room mates who lived because selling her body every night.

Summer shivered at the thought of those nights. It had been even more horrifying than the nights she'd spent out in New York just because she didn't want to go home and listen to her mother and the stepfather screwing each other. As she thought about those nights she became even more disgusted about herself.

So, having lived through these years, Summer was now determined that she didn't want pain any more. She wanted no feelings, she wanted to be blank and not even exist.

That was the reason of why she stood on the pier, outside of the railing, looking out over the black ocean. She'd chosen this place because it was a place she'd gone to when times were so hard she felt like dying. So why not end it all right there?

Swallowing and making an attempt to drown her sobs and hold back her tears, Summer looked down. The waves were pretty high and smashed against the pier. Maybe she would die out of cold or maybe she'd drown. Maybe she would be smashed into one of the huge logs.

This was really pathetic. She was just standing there, looking down. Why didn't she just jump down there and let the ocean take her? You just had to jump, not think.

When she'd met so many obstacles in her life this couldn't be worse, right? It was easier and better. It was something good. She was saving the world from herself and she was saving all the people she might get in contact with. She was actually doing something good, something very unselfish.

If she let go of the railing and let the wind take her into the dark water everything would be over. And it would be just like she wanted it to be, like she'd always wanted it to be. It was a shame that she hadn't done this before.

"Excuse me?"

What was that? A voice? From another person? Talking to her?

He probably wanted to know what time it was.

She couldn't let anyone interrupt her though so she didn't answer. The person could just go and ask someone else.

"Hey," There he was again.

Just go away.

"Please come to the other side of the railing."

No. I'm gonna jump and you can't stop me. No one can.

Suddenly Summer felt a hand on her arm. "You're freezing."

He was right, she was almost shaking.

His other hand found her shoulder and she almost died right there. Out of embarrassment.

She began to cry.

Maybe it was the fact that he had stopped her.

Or maybe it was his touch. The fact that he even cared to stop her.

"Let me help you." His hand found hers and he took it in his, warming her cold one. "You don't want this."

She couldn't say a thing. She couldn't answer him and let him get to her. He didn't want her dead on his conscience. That was all.

But he squeezed her hand and she let him. Then she nodded.

She wanted to do this.

"No. Let me buy you some coffee and we can talk."

And without realizing it she nodded again.

"Good. Now let me help you."

He turned her around and she lowered her head as to hide her teary face. He gently placed his hand on her chin though and brought it back up.

She finally saw him.

His deep brown eyes and curly brown hair. His slim body and his soft facial expression.

His hand then found her waist and he lifted her over the railing. She hadn't been lifted by anyone since she was three years old. Not once.

Her arms automatically went around his neck as to support herself. But as he'd lifted her over the railing she didn't let go. And his arms found their way around her waist, hugging her body.

Her tears returned. This time without any sobs. She hadn't cried in front of a person since she was five.

He brought her closer and let her cry into his jacket. His fingers lightly stroked her shiny hair, in a way no one had done before.

Her fists closed around some of his jacket, holding on to him as if she never wanted him to go.

She cried out of desperation and she held onto him desperately.

He must have noticed because he pulled away and caught her eyes. "Would you like some coffee?"

Summer nodded, forcing her tears back.

She knew what he thought. She could feel it. He knew that she was crazy.

Embarrassed again, Summer started to walk in a really quick pace.

"Hey, wait. We could go to the diner. It's right over there." He was pointing to a regular diner just near. It actually looked pretty nice.

"Okay,"

It was the first time she spoke and it was almost in a whisper.

He gave her a smile and placed his hand on her small back, guiding her to the diner.

vvvvvvvvvvvvv

Summer had been staring down in her cup for several minutes now.

There wasn't anything she could say. It wasn't like she was going to thank him. He'd ruined it. If it wasn't for the person sitting opposite her she wouldn't even be here. It would have been over.

"What's your name?" she asked after a while though. She carefully looked up and saw that he was watching her.

"I'm Seth." he said. "You?"

"Summer."

He smiled. "Summer. That's a beautiful name. It suits you."

She would have smiled as well, be polite, but today she couldn't. Instead another tear rolled down her cheek.

To her surprise he wiped it away. "Where do you live?"

"L.A." she whispered, shivering by his touch.

He nodded and sat back down in his seat, that he'd gone up from as she'd started to cry. "I live just near. In Newport."

"Oh," Summer said and sniffled.

Seth seemed to be a little nervous but yet he was so calm and made Summer feel like he had everything under control. "Is there anyone you want to call?"

"No." Summer answered quickly. "There's no one."

That answer said so much. It was depressing how true it really was. No one.

"Maybe I should go. I don't want to take your time." Summer said and started to stand up.

"Wait!" Seth caught her arm. "Where are you going?"

"Home," she shortly said.

"Do you need a ride?" he offered.

"I'll be okay."

"Oh. But I don't want you to be alone right now. Are you sure that we can't call someone?"

"Yes! The is no one!" Summer yelled and sunk down in the seat again, her hands covering her face with her hands.

"I'm sorry." he gently said and it sounded so sincere.

Summer softly cried into her hands; all that she could do these days it seemed. She kept it quiet though, aware of the fact that she was in the middle of a diner and Seth was there. She didn't want to be too rude even though she knew that he wouldn't care.

Summer had expected him to be gone as she sat back straight up, wiping her tears away and trying to gather herself enough. He sat there though, having ordered another cup of coffee.

"Would you like some more as well, Summer?"

He called her Summer. People didn't call her Summer.

"No, thanks." Summer answered, having no idea what else to say.

The man sitting opposite her took a deep breath and while looking into her eyes he started to talk. "This might sound really weird and maybe creepy, but would you like to come over to my place. I have a very comfortable sofa."

She was able to utter a short laugh, but she kept being moody. "I don't even know you."

He nodded. "Point taken. But I don't want you to be alone right now."

"Why? Do you think I'm emotionally unstable?"

Seth was the one to look down this time.

She realised that she already knew the answer to that. It was pretty obvious. "You don't have to answer that."

"So, will you?" he asked again, sounding pretty hopeful.

"Come with you?" Summer asked as if she couldn't believe what he'd actually said.

"Yeah,"

"I'm sure you'll change your mind. I'm not very nice." Why did she always do that? Push people away. But she did it for them; she knew that nobody really had enjoyed getting to know her before so why would they now?

"Please. Come with me and I'll get to decide whether or not I think you're nice."

His smile was something she couldn't resist. And she didn't want to disappoint him.

"Okay then."

vvvvvvvvvvvv

He'd brought her to his place.

He'd actually taken her with him home. And it was nice.

The place, not to be there. Summer didn't like to be with other people.

"I've placed your things in the bathroom."

Seth appeared. She was sitting on the sofa but instantly got up and went to the bathroom.

Saying 'thank you' wouldn't be right. Not when she didn't mean it.

His bathroom was cool. Nothing like what she had seen before and nothing like she had, with cockroaches under the tub. This was neat and clean and smelled good.

Not like she would care what kind of bathroom he had though.

It was just tonight and this was horrible.

Why did she say yes to this anyway? She could have walked away and done what she'd had in mind the whole day.

Jump into that water.

She undressed and stepped into the shower. He didn't have any shampoo or soap she'd normally use.

The floor was cold as she sat down, bringing her legs up to her chest. She used to sit like this, with the water pouring over her and just cry. The tears couldn't be seen and she couldn't hear herself as the sound of the water was reducing her crying.

She hated to cry.

But what else could she do? She hated Seth. He'd ruined everything.

She was alive because of him.

She hated him.

"Summer?"

Seth.

Why couldn't he just go to bed and forget that she was there?

"Summer? Are you okay in there?"

She turned the water off and placed the towel he'd given her around her body.

"I'm fine." she said as she opened the door. He stood there in a T-shirt and his jeans, looking concerned.

"I just wanted to make sure. If you need anything just let me know, okay?" He managed to give her a calm smile but she couldn't possibly smile back. He'd only think that she actually was glad to be there. And she wasn't.

"Okay."

Summer then silently closed the door and dropped the towel, slowly getting dressed again.

vvvvvvvvvv

This was not what she was supposed to do. She shouldn't be here.

Everything felt wrong. She didn't fit in a place like this. And Seth was definitely not happy to have her here. Summer knew that he only invited her over out of pity or because he didn't want to read in the paper that she'd died just after they parted.

This day was so horrible. All she wanted to do was cry.

And yet she couldn't. She couldn't possibly cry any more in front of Seth. Or Seth's apartment.

She felt so embarrassed about everything. She'd cried into his chest and let herself be hugged. She'd let him come too close.

It wasn't good. It didn't feel good.

It didn't feel good. She didn't need another person.

Yet she kept thinking of that feeling she'd had as he'd hugged her. She hadn't hugged a person for such a long time, no one wanted to hug Summer Roberts.

But why should they? Summer completely understood. She wouldn't want to hug herself either.

She wanted to cry. His touch made her cry. Nothing could make her stop crying now.

Not even Seth walking into the room…

_So, is it even worth continuing?_


	2. Chapter 2

_Wow! Huge thanks for the reviews!_

_As you can see I've decided to continue with this story. I hope you'll like it!_

vvvvvvvvvvvv

Seth was completely distracted; his work was just not something he could think about now. His thoughts kept coming back to Summer; this beautiful girl who was the most unhappy person he'd ever met.

Why he'd even helped her surprised Seth. He was no good with helping people, calming people down or anything like that. He'd never been. But somehow he just wanted to help Summer so bad that he actually had.

But now she was gone. She'd just disappeared this morning.

Seth kept thinking that maybe she really didn't want to live. But he'd sensed that she wanted to stay with him; she'd been so broken but he knew that she could be okay. If only she wanted to.

The fact that she'd told him that 'there was no one' concerned him. She really shouldn't be alone at a time like this. If only he knew where she lived or what he whole name was. What if she tried to do what she tried last night? And what if no one was there to stop her this time?

He wondered what had gone wrong. How bad could things be? They had to be really bad if she didn't want to live any more but what could be so wrong?

And why had the people close to her let this happen? She had to have someone, a friend, a family. Someone. Everyone had someone.

He'd heard her cry last night. He'd walked up to see how she was doing and she'd laid on his sofa with the blankets wrapped tightly around her, crying softly into the pillow. Seth hated when people cried. He hated that they were so sad that they wanted to cry. And he hated not being enough to make them stop.

vvvvvvvvvvvvvv

Summer hung up the last sock, sighing as she saw another cockroach run underneath the tub. What was it with these small, cruel animals? Even they wanted to make her day even worse.

Walking out of her tiny bathroom and carefully closing the fragile door behind her she flopped down on her bed. She had no life. No life at all.

Summer hated being depressed. But how was she supposed to not be depressed?

She knew that she was being weak by wanting to escape. But if she disappeared it would be a good thing, right? Even Seth wouldn't care. He probably didn't even remember her.

She'd been forgotten too many times; so many times that she was used to it. What was to remember about her anyway? A short girl with a sad face?

She hated to leave this morning and return to this crappy place. Even if it was hers it was torture. It was a place filled of memories; memories of her holding a knife against her neck or crying herself to sleep at nights. There was probably not a single good memory attached to this apartment, therefore Summer rather walked around. Anywhere but near her apartment.

And still she'd returned. At five in the morning. But she'd woken up in a nice sofa and felt so guilty. Guilty and embarrassed.

Seth must think that she was crazy, she was. She always broke down, several times each day and she never smiled. She was boring and cold and nothing fun. And it was killing her.

Everything inside hurt as she thought about it, or as she thought about most things. It was worse than death, to feel like you were dying inside but still not being able to escape from it all. Let go.

Why hadn't she just jumped? As Seth had appeared she would have just jumped. Who cared about what he'd feel? It wasn't like he was going to miss her and think about what a loss it was. He'd just be sad that he'd seen a person die, but he would have forgotten about it.

But instead she'd let him touch her. She'd let him hug her and she'd hugged him. She'd cried into his jacket.

That was just something she couldn't let go, forget.

Summer couldn't forget how another person's touch had felt like.

Wasn't she pathetic? She was thinking about a person she'd only met yesterday. He'd just been nice to her because she was such a wreck. Otherwise he would never even have noticed her.

Seth probably had a really good life. He must have because if he had an apartment as nice as his, he must be rich and have a great job. He probably even had a girlfriend and a great family.

How come she had the crappiest of families? Why couldn't Summer had grown up in a nice place like Newport with parents who actually cared about her?

All her life she'd been jealous, thinking about how good lives everybody else had. She'd never had a good friend, at least not since she was a little girl. She'd never had someone to talk to, who cared and who she could share her problems with.

Another person's affection had just never been there.

She hated this; to pity herself.

It was so much easier to hate. To hate and to be unworthy.

She'd much rather think that she didn't need, didn't deserve, another person. It was so much easier than thinking of how much she needed and wanted. But as the years had passed Summer was now sure of the fact that she didn't _need. _Summer was not a person whose needs had to be fulfilled. She'd never gotten what she needed and need was now nothing for her.

She'd simply accepted the fact that no one was supposed to give her anything. She wasn't supposed to have other people around. Her life was just a failure, a big failure. And also a failure that she should never let other people come in contact with. She knew that she did them a favour leaving them alone.

It was a favour to her as well.

vvvvvvvvvvvv

Summer walked along the pier again. She was usually around here every day, just walking. Sometimes she sat down on a bench and watched all the people. She imagined how their lives were. But mostly she was too depressed for that.

Mostly Summer would just walk there, almost like a zombie.

The ocean made her thoughts clearer somehow and the light from the open sky was comforting. Some days, when the pier was too crowded, she'd go to a quiet place on the beach. Too much people made her feel lonely, too lonely.

All her life Summer had loved the ocean. She'd loved to go swimming or just take a walk on the beach. That was the reason of why she'd moved here, to California.

As she spotted the little diner and the table she and Seth had been sitting at the night before, all the bad memories came back. Like a flashback.

How she's been standing just near the bench and decided to jump. She'd climbed over the railing and really believed that the end had come. But, Seth came and today she was back here, alive.

She wasn't happy about it. If she'd jumped everything bad would be gone right now, and thanks to Seth she still hated everything and she still felt the pain.

But one thing which she couldn't possibly forget, no matter how hard she tried, was how it had felt like to be hugged again and to feel that maybe someone in this world cared for her. Maybe someone would think about her death, not cry or miss her, but remember. Maybe there would be someone who would think that it was a shame that she'd died.

Maybe someone like Seth would want her to live. Even if Summer knew that Seth probably was a really good person, maybe a teacher who loved other people and loved to help, she couldn't stop thinking that maybe he wouldn't have hugged just anybody.

He didn't know her or anything but maybe he'd want to give her a chance. She might ruin it and do some horrible stuff but maybe he'd want to try to get to know her.

What was she even thinking? Seth had his own life and his own friends. Just because she remembered him didn't mean that he would remember her. Seth probably had enough of people in his life and he certainly didn't need someone who was mentally unstable.

But he seemed like such a nice person, someone who could be open and let new people in. Maybe he'd want to help her.

Summer knew that a break down was coming. Every time her thought drifted away on these things she needed to cry. So, she walked away.

There was just no way Summer could cry openly in public.

Why were there so many people everywhere? As she searched the place, the beach and the pier, it all seemed to be crowded. At a time when it shouldn't be.

Her first tears rolled down her cheek. She quickly wiped it away and began to walk faster up the streets. Just anywhere where it wasn't this many people.

Summer hated to let them see her; she didn't want to be noticed. If she started to cry people would just look at her and think that she was crazy. Not that she wasn't, but people didn't always have to know that.

Walking up the first street she spotted a tree, a place where she could have some privacy. She quickly walked there and leaned against the tree, finally letting it all out. Not everything though, she couldn't cry too loud. She just let the tears escape from her eyes. But she did her very best to hold the sobs inside.

Why couldn't this wait until she was home? She usually held it in, to release it all at night. But today wasn't a good day. Heck, this wasn't a good week.

Crying into her hands, as she mostly did to hide it even if she knew that no one saw, she sunk down to the ground. This was so awful. She couldn't even be strong enough to hold it back.

After several minutes, when Summer had calmed down a little, she stood up and fixed her clothes. She wiped her face and really wished that she'd brought a mirror.

Laughing at how pathetic she was, Summer slowly began to walk up the street.

That was when she saw the house. The house she'd been in last night.

Seth's place.

Maybe she could borrow his mirror. Or just get a glass of water; she was really thirsty after the crying session.

No. She couldn't just show up. They didn't even know each other. And he was probably busy; she'd just be in the way.

Then what was she doing outside of his house? Why was she walking towards the door?

"Good afternoon, miss," a man behind a desk greeted her with a smile. Seth must be really rich.

The night before she hadn't really noticed how nice it really was. Fresh flowers, several elevators, people in nice clothes.

And in the middle of it, Summer stood with her old clothes and her brown bag. She must look awful from the crying though, although she was happy that she didn't wear any makeup.

"Miss, can I help you?" the man asked, again with that smile.

"Um, I'm looking for…um…Seth," she stuttered awkwardly.

The man smiled again, showing his perfect teeth. "Mr. Cohen. He's on the third floor, miss. If you take the elevator Michael will show you. Is Mr. Cohen expecting you?"

"Um, no. It's sort of a…a surprise."

"Oh, I get it," the man said with a knowing smile. "Don't hesitate to ask if you need anything. I'm Charlie Richards by the way. But you can call me Charlie."

"Thank you, Charlie. I'm Summer."

"A beautiful name."

She then headed for the elevators.

"It's in the end of the corridor, miss." Summer nodded and started to walk around the third floor, not recognizing anything.

Everything was so nice, that she almost felt like and intruder. She didn't fit in. But it was kind of nice to be in a place like this. She hadn't before.

This was so much better than her apartment. It was all dirty and strange people always occupied the hallways. Here, she was walking alone on the clean carpet.

Alone. And it felt nice.

"Summer?"

Oh, no. Seth.

He was walking against her, smiling.

"What are you doing here?"

Summer stopped walking, panicking. "You know, visiting."

"Oh, you know someone here? Because I haven't seen you here before. Except last night I mean."

Summer shrugged. "About last night…" she started uncertainly.

Seth noticed and quickly spoke. "Don't worry about it. I'm just glad that you're okay. You deserve to be happy, Summer."

"Thanks,"

She then walked away, like she always did.

God, this was horrible. And she was actually feeling better inside this building. She should have known that it was too good to be true.

Now she really wanted to sink to the floor and die.

_Please review!_

_Maybe I'll update really soon. This chapter came up this soon because of you. Don't forget that._

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	3. Chapter 3

_Thank you all so much for the reviews! You're so awesome. _

_I'm really so happy because of the reviews that I'm posting the third chapter. Enjoy!_

Summer quickly walked away and as soon as the corridor turned she leaned against the wall and placed her hands over her face. She was such an idiot.

She was so stupid. To Seth she was just a person. Just a face. She wasn't special. He wanted to go on with his life.

Now she really had to hold back the tears. She couldn't cry in this nice corridor where rich people could walk pass her every second.

But a few tears slipping down her face couldn't be stopped.

vvvvvvvvvv

God! He was so stupid. Didn't he think at all?

As Seth had seen Summer he'd been happy. Because he'd worried about her so much. Now she was alive and she seemed to be doing pretty good.

If only he had been a little more attentive.

Downstairs Charlie had told him that a Summer had come to see him. And he'd understood.

Now here he was, rushing through the corridor. What had he done? You did not want to hurt a person like Summer.

"Summer!" Seth saw her standing close to the wall. She looked so small, so tiny.

Summer looked away as he appeared; he couldn't see her cry. Not again.

"I'm sorry." He said and walked closer to her, stopping just next to her.

She knew that he knew that she was crying. How could he not see the tears on her face and hear her heavy breathing?

And the fact that he was standing right next to her made everything so much worse. And she lost it. Again.

"Summer," Seth placed his arms around her shoulders and carefully pulled her close to him, not wanting to be too forward. "It's okay."

He rocked her and felt her relax in his arms. She was so fragile and so small and he hated to see her so broken. "Let's step into my place."

Seth led her to his apartment and they sat down on the sofa she'd slept on the night before. Summer buried her face into his shirt once again, crying so softly.

"Sorry." She abruptly sat up after a few seconds, and embarrassed turned her face away from Seth. "I'm so stupid."

"You're not stupid, Summer. I'm the one who's stupid." Seth told her, being honest. "I didn't realize what I was saying or doing before. I'm sorry." He stroked her arm, hoping to make her feel better. This was his fault and he had to fix it.

Summer hated when people apologized; she had absolutely no idea what to say back. And it wasn't his fault, it was hers. "It's okay. I shouldn't have come."

"Summer, I am glad that you came. I've been really worried about you." Seth told her sincerely, looking straight into her eyes. She hated eye contact. It was just impossible to know where to look and she felt so vulnerable and naked.

Looking away, she asked. "You have?"

"Yes. I have no idea where you live or what your whole name is but if I'd known I would have come to see you."

"You wouldn't wanna come to my place." Summer said bitterly.

Seth shrugged her comment off. "So, what's your whole name?"

"Summer Roberts."

"Roberts. I'm-"

"Seth Cohen, I know." She interrupted him. "Charlie told me."

"Oh." Seth nodded. "Listen, do you want to stay for a while? I was actually on my way to the store because I have like no food here so I could rent a movie or something."

"I wasn't planning on staying actually."

"Right. Maybe you have plans." Seth said and looked at her, waiting for her answer.

Summer nervously bit her nail. She had no plans, she never had. Maybe it would be nice to stay for a little while.

"I don't." Seth looked confused. "Have any plans I mean." Summer explained.

"So you can stay then. I could use some company. It gets kind of lonely to live alone."

Summer smiled. "I get what you mean."

"You smiled." Seth pointed out and smiled as well. Maybe she felt better.

"Did I?" Summer asked, looking a little worried.

"Hey, that's a good thing. Right?"

She shrugged. "I guess."

"Do you want to stay here while I go to the store? I'll hurry."

Summer thought about it and realised that it would be kind of nice to be alone in a place like this. She was walking around outside too much anyway. It was nice to be inside.

So, she nodded. "If that's okay."

"Of course it is. Just make yourself at home." Seth smiled brightly. "I don't have any food although I have some Coke I think. And I have movies but maybe we should watch one together. You decide. And you know where the bathroom is and the-"

"Seth!" Summer said, kind of surprised of how good she felt. "I'll be okay. Now go to the store."

Seth shut his mouth; he knew that he had some real rambling issues.

"Okay. See you soon then."

And he walked out of the apartment, leaving Summer sitting on the sofa.

God, this place was beautiful. Last night she hadn't been in the mood for anything but now, she was really curious of seeing the rest of the place.

This was like a dream. Seth must live a very pleasant life. He had everything, big TV, DVDs, computer, a dining area and several bathrooms.

Summer wasn't sure that she should look inside of his bedroom; maybe he wanted that part to be private. And it wasn't like she was someone he knew very well. She was a stranger, a stranger alone in his apartment.

But, just because he was in the store and he'd told her to make herself at home, she opened the door she figured hid his bedroom. And she was right.

Summer walked into a cosy room, brown and green colours. His clothes were lying on his bed, that wasn't made by the way. He had a desk, a small sofa and of course a TV. Wow! This bedroom was like nothing she'd ever seen before. Having a TV in your bedroom was like a dream.

The room was pretty dark, probably because of the curtains. But everything looked just so perfect and his bed seemed to be really great.

Fighting the urge to try it, Summer quickly opened the door to his bathroom. Summer would kill for an own bathroom like this. Everything was so clean.

Suddenly Summer felt really bad. Why did she always get so jealous and why was she always so interested in how other people had it? She was a horrible person for looking in Seth's most private rooms. He for sure didn't want her in there.

God, what was she doing?

Quickly closing the door again Summer hurried back to the sofa; a place where she knew it was okay for her to sit. Because he'd placed her there.

vvvvvvvvvvv

Seth walked into his apartment after having done maybe the quickest grocery shopping in his entire life. He'd been worried that Summer wouldn't still be there when he got home. Just as he'd left he'd started thinking about that. Maybe she'd disappear again.

But she was still there. Thankfully.

"Hi Summer!" he said and walked into the living room. "Everything okay?"

He'd noticed that she sat staring into space, not even giving him a nod as he'd entered the room.

"What's wrong?" he asked her concerned. As she didn't answer he placed and arm around her, accepting her silence.

Summer was happy that he didn't push her to tell him. She wasn't a very good talker, not when it came to feelings. So, she leaned into him and closed her eyes, happy to just have him there.

After several minutes Seth wondered I she had fallen asleep. "Summer?"

She moved her face but still kept it close to his chest.

"I should take care of the food, but you can just stay here if you want. I'll be right back." Summer nodded and let him get up.

In the kitchen Seth was placing the food in the refrigerator and in the cupboards. He was really concerned about Summer. One second she seemed to be fine and the next she was being so vulnerable and sad.

"Want some help?"

Summer appeared, in a better mood.

"It's okay. I was actually wondering what food you like. What are you up for?"

"Oh, I eat everything." Summer said, not wanting him to plan the food because of her.

Seth nodded. "I don't really feel like cooking anything right now. Do you like pizza?"

"Yeah." Summer loved pizza.

"Great. I'll go order. You can chose a movie if you want."

He couldn't tell her to choose. What if she picked out something he didn't want to see, or something he thought was really boring?

Summer hated to be left to choose something. She didn't know why she was so afraid of it but she was terrified.

"So, you've picked one?" Seth said after a while, when he came back into the room.

Summer sat in the sofa. "No. I can't decide."

"Okay. What kind of movies do you like then?"

"Anything will be good."

"Anything? Okay." Seth said calmly, trying to choose a movie himself. "Do you like action?"

Summer knew that she didn't but what if he loved action? She couldn't make him watch some cheesy chick flick. It was his home. So, she nodded.

"You do?" he asked, almost in disbelief. "I've never met any girl who's into action."

Summer shrugged, feeling very out of place. "I'm not like other girls."

"I know."

What was that? Did he think that she was weird? Of course he did. Why wouldn't he think that? She was weird, really weird.

Seth held up three movies she'd never even heard about before. "What do you think of one of these?"

Summer could sense his excitement so again she nodded. "Great."

vvvvvvvvvvv

Forty minutes later Seth was very much into the movie. He'd never seen a Yakuza movie before with someone beside him. So this was cool.

But Summer wasn't very into it, he could tell. She was asleep and had been from the minute she's finished eating.

"I don't think you liked the movie, huh?" he said to himself as he watched her sleep peacefully next to him. He should have understood that not many females liked these movies.

Summer actually seemed more like a person who liked dramas or romantic films. Next time, he'd choose something like that.

Seth didn't really understand why she was so afraid. If she didn't like a movie, couldn't she just say so? And before when she's been in the corridor, couldn't she had told him that she came to visit him?

But Seth couldn't possibly understand. He had no problems with speaking his mind or talking. Summer had.

She didn't look sick as she lay there; she looked just like any other person. But in some way she was sick, Seth was sure of that. And he wanted to help her.

He had no idea how to treat a person like her; he wasn't good in giving advice or anything. He hadn't been in contact with anyone like Summer before. The only thing he knew, or at least thought, was that he should be her friend and give her time and attention. She said that she didn't have anyone so he wanted to be there for her.

Seth just hoped that she could open up.

vvvvvvvvvvv

"Hi," Summer sat up and saw that Seth was reading the paper while drinking some beer. He smiled and immediately put the paper away, giving her his whole attention.

"Did you sleep well?"

She nodded. "Sorry that I missed the movie. It seemed really good."

"Summer, you don't have to lie. I know that you didn't like it and don't worry; I don't know a single person who does except I."

"Yeah," she said, surprised that she'd let him know the truth. Normally she would have said that she loved movies like that. But somehow, she felt secure enough to not lie.

Seth nodded and smiled. "So, tell me about yourself."

"What is there to tell?" Summer asked with a lack of enthusiasm.

"Everything. Start with what you do." Seth smiled, made himself comfortable and offered Summer some beer as well.

And, to her surprise, Summer accepted the beer and started to talk.

_Please give me a review!_

_Suggestions are always as great. _

_Any thoughts really. So, please review!_


	4. Chapter 4

_Eveyone reviewing; a big thank you._

_Here's chapter four. Enjoy!_

Summer was desperately trying to fix her hair. Why couldn't she have straight hair? Everything would be so much easier. With naturally wavy hair, it just never looked good. Not in Summer's eyes anyway.

She was going to dinner with Seth. He'd told her that he wanted to see how she lived but she'd said no to dinner at her place; she never cooked anything good. And Summer didn't want anyone in her apartment for long, if even at all.

But as Seth had insisted to see her home, she'd said yes. So he would come pick her up any minute.

It was only three days ago they'd met so they still didn't really know each other. But for having known a person for only three days, Summer thought that Seth knew her pretty well. At least better than anyone else did, which wasn't a lot.

A knock on her door made Summer abruptly drop her brush. Was he already there?

"Hi," she politely said as she opened the door. Seth stood there with a bouquet in his hands.

"This is for you." He gave her the flowers and stepped into her apartment.

Summer smiled. "Thanks. But you didn't have to,"

"I just thought they were nice. And you said that you liked flowers." Seth could remember how she'd told him that she loved flowers and wanted a big garden with all kinds some day.

"I do." Summer quickly said, afraid that she was being ungrateful of his gesture. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." Seth walked past her, looking around. He wasn't nervous at all; there was something about him that always was calm and relaxed.

And most of the times, Summer felt relaxed around him. At least after a while. In the beginning she was always as nervous. But maybe that was to be expected. Summer wasn't really used to having people around.

"So this is your place." Seth stated.

"Yeah," Summer said in a low voice, slightly embarrassed. "It's nothing like yours but…" her voice died out; she had no idea what to say. This was her place.

It was small and ugly and for a person like Seth it had to look like much worse. He was used to big spaces, nice furniture and just a lot higher status.

Seth hesitated but decided to talk. "Who were all those people in the hallway?"

Summer shrugged. "Just people."

"Like criminals, homeless people?" Summer nodded and uncomfortably looked down. She hated to be revised.

"Is this you?" Seth asked as he picked up a photo. It was a four year old Summer together with her parents.

Summer nodded. "Yeah, that's me." She then took the picture from Seth's hands and placed it under a pillow in the sofa.

He seemed to understand that she wanted that private. "Those people out there, do they stay here all the time?"

"Seth, please. This is just the way I live. I'm a waitress." Summer said and looked pleadingly at him. "Can we just go?"

Seth nodded. "Of course."

The last thing he wanted to do was to upset her.

vvvvvvvvv

"Can I ask you something, Seth?" Summer asked as they'd started to eat. Seth nodded but kept eating his steak. "I just wonder why you are being so nice to me. I mean, the first time I get because…yeah."

Seth thought about it, kind of glad that she had the courage to ask. "Summer, I really enjoy spending time with you. I could use a friend as much as you."

"You really want to be friends?" Summer was very uncertain, like she was afraid to ask.

"Don't sound so surprised." Seth said with a laugh. "You should give yourself some more credit, Sum."

Summer nodded. "I'm just not used to it, you know? I've never had a friend; I mean a real one." She confessed, hoping that she wasn't revealing too much.

"Then it's about time, don't you think?" Summer didn't answer but began to eat again. "I think that you're nice by the way."

She gave him a confused look.

"You said to me that you weren't very nice the first time we met. And I've decided that I do think you're nice."

She looked up and forgot about the food on her fork. "No one's said that to me before."

"There are lots of things that you have never heard but you should have." Seth just said.

To that there was just nothing she could say. Of course she knew that it wasn't true but Seth made it sound like it, as so many other things he made her think about.

Changing the subject as fast as possible, not wanting to talk about herself anymore, Summer smiled. "Tell me about your family, about how you grew up."

There was just something she liked about other people, knowing about their lives and families. She liked to hear how perfect their lives were.

"Well, I grew up in Newport. My mom's a typical mom though she can't cook. She's blonde, slim and beautiful. She has a dating service although she used to work for my grandfather, who owned a big company. He died though, so."

"I'm sorry," Summer said out of sympathy. She then gave Seth an encouraging look, enjoying hearing about this.

"And my dad's a lawyer. Think he's funny although he's not." Seth explained with enthusiasm. "But he's great and so is my mom."

By that he was only met by a smile, a smile he couldn't read but somehow he thought that it was a sad smile. But he continued.

"Then there's Ryan. My brother, or he's actually adopted. He came to us when I was sixteen and he's the same age. He's my best friend."

"Where is he now?" Summer wondered.

"He lives just near with his girlfriend Marissa."

"Your family sounds really nice, Seth."

"Well, they are. We're very close, partly because at a time they were my only friends."

Summer looked confused again so Seth explained.

"I wasn't really what you would call popular in school. I didn't have any friends so I was home a lot, with the parents or later on, Ryan."

Summer nodded, understanding."Oh. I wasn't very popular either."

"No? Then you know what it's like."

"Yeah."

"Do you have any siblings?"

"No, I'm the only child. It's just I and my parents. My parents divorced when I was young though so I didn't really have any contact with my father."

"You lived with your mother?" Seth carefully asked.

"Yeah," she shortly said and looked away. There was no way that she even wanted to think about her mother; it just made her upset.

"Will you excuse me? I have to use the bathroom." Summer rose and quickly walked to the rest rooms.

vvvvvvvv

_It was just like every night. Summer sat in her room with a plate in front of her. Two sandwiches and a glass of water; her usual dinner. _

_She tried to ignore the sound coming from downstairs; the sound of music and laughter. She had the music on too, on her mom's old stereo. _

_This was a daily routine. She came home from school and watched some TV before her mom got home. The she quickly made her dinner and got upstairs before Hank arrived. At that time you did not want to be downstairs, not even at home. But where else was she supposed to go? _

_So now she was trying to do her homework and eat her cheese sandwiches as the music from downstairs kept getting louder. She was so tired of it all. So tired. _

_Sometimes she just wanted to stop; stop with everything. But something made her live through it. Maybe it was the wishes of that one day find a better family, a family who would pay attention to her. A mom who'd ask her how her day was and make her dinner and a dad who actually would be there. Not somewhere in _ _Europe_

_She lowered her head down to her books, crying the day's first tears but not the last. She knew that she cried in the evenings. It was just what she did. While other fifteen year olds watched TV, she spent her nights crying and holding a pillow over her head. _

_Sometimes she went for a walk, to clear her head and just get away. She always liked the cold wind against her skin and if she got sick didn't matter at all. Who cared if she missed school for a couple of days? It wasn't like her mom would force her to go and her school mates wouldn't even notice that she wasn't there. _

_School was just not fun. But what was? Nothing. _

_The only thing that Summer actually enjoyed was to dream, dream away. To _ _California__ where she wouldn't need her mother and where nobody knew her. No one would know a single thing about her. She could start over and create her own life. _

_Just leave this behind. _

_Sometimes she had nightmares and woke up in the middle of the night, crying. She so desperately needed someone to be there and hug her, tell her that it all was a dream, just a dream. _

_But it wasn't a dream. Her life was a nightmare she'd never wake up from. _

vvvvvvvvv

Tears were streaming down her face. As usual.

Nights were just horrible, it all came out.

This night was no different, even if it had been a rather good day. She had felt better these last couple of days. But at nights nothing could stop her from feeling her worst.

Tears were a thing that Summer was very used to; it was strange how she even could cry any more. She'd cried so much during the last couple of years, or generally in life, that you could think that somehow the tears would go away and maybe be replaced my something else.

But the tears kept coming, every day. Some days more than others but every day she cried, for some reason.

If only something could rise her up from this.

vvvvvvvvvv

She woke up by the sound of the phone. That was a first.

Realising that she still was in her clothes from yesterday and probably had the makeup smeared all over her face, she was just glad that it wasn't the doorbell. The phone was much safer.

"Hello," she said into the phone. It had only been used for emergencies, like calling in sick to work or if she at sometime needed to call 911. Otherwise Summer never used it.

She wasn't surprised who was calling though. "Hi, Summer!" Seth's voice put a smile on her face. It felt nice that somebody actually called for her.

"Seth, hi!"

He cleared his throat. "What are you doing?"

"Um, nothing. I just woke up actually."

"Oh. Would you like to meet and do something today?" he casually asked.

"Like what?"

"I don't know. Just something."

Summer smiled; she really felt like meeting him. Strange, but it felt good. "I'd love to."

Seth had probably heard her enthusiasm because as he replied he was much happier. "I'll come pick you up in an hour then."

_Please review! They mean so much!_

_And I have pretty much everything written in chapter five. Think about that._


	5. Chapter 5

. 

_Thank you SO much for the reviews! I hope you'll all like this chapter._

One month later…

"Summer?" Seth walked into her apartment as she hadn't answered the door; that also had been unlocked. He was getting slightly worried as he walked through the mess in her living room; clothes lied everywhere and it all just looked very messy. Maybe she'd been kidnapped.

Seth quickly searched the apartment, that wasn't very big. No Summer.

"Sum?" No answer.

Seth saw the pot on the stove and immediately felt his heart beat faster. Everybody knew that you didn't leave without turning the stove off and locking the front door. Even Summer had to know that.

Sure, she lived in a house Seth thought was dangerous for her. But she still had to be careful; she was very vulnerable as a single woman, maybe even more in this house. Every time Seth came to pick her up or come to see her, the hallways and the stairs were crowded; and the people didn't look very nice.

How could he let her stay here all by herself?

Summer was brave and strong but never could she fight those big guys. God, he didn't even want her to have to fight. She deserved to live somewhere safe.

And this place was definitely not safe.

He opened the bathroom door, in hope that she might be in there. But all he saw was three cockroaches.

Seth frowned and quickly closed the door.

"Summer, where the hell are you?" he asked out to the empty apartment. She knew that he was coming, so where was she?

Maybe she really had been kidnapped.

Picking up his cell, Seth dialled her number.

_"Hi, it's Summer. Please leave a message." _

Seth was the one who'd talked her into recording that. She'd just said that no one needed to leave any messages but after some time of very annoying complaints from Seth, Summer had finally given in.

As he heard the front door open and shut Seth sighed out in relief. And as Summer appeared, perfectly fine, he couldn't do anything else but hug her.

Summer was a little taken off guard by his sudden embrace but she quickly hugged him back. By now, she had gotten used to these kinds of hugs and she needed them all the time.

"Are you alright?" Seth asked and released her from his tight embrace. His worried gaze met hers and she could see that he was really scared.

She smiled. "Of course I am."

And she was okay, as in okay from being hurt. But still she was nowhere near okay inside. Seth didn't have to know everything though; she hated to complain all the time. He'd just get tired of her if she didn't let him believe that she was okay.

And she needed him as her friend.

"I got worried when you weren't here." Seth explained. "You shouldn't leave your door unlocked and not have the stove on when you're not at home."

"And here I thought that you worried about me." Summer joked, laughing a little. She then went to turn the stove off. "Happy?"

Seth nodded. "Where were you anyway?"

Summer shrugged. "I really needed to go to the store."

"Oh,"

"Yeah. Let me just go to the bathroom and then we can leave."

"Okay."

vvvvvvvvvv

In the middle of their monopoly playing Seth's phone rang. The two of them sat at the dining room table with the game between them.

"Aren't you going to answer that?" Summer asked as Seth didn't move.

He raised his hand. "I'm thinking."

She giggled; he was so into the game. As always Seth didn't want to lose. Neither did Summer but she didn't want Seth to be sad so she always let him win, even if she could beat him.

"Maybe it's important." She said but he kept focusing on the game, counting his money.

So, Summer got up and answered.

"Hello? Seth?" a female voice said, sounding very confused.

Summer kind of regretted the fact that she'd answered. "Oh, hi. I'm Summer."

She didn't really have time to say anything else before the female started to talk. "I must have dialled the wrong number. Sorry if I disturbed."

"No, no." Summer quickly said. "This is Seth's phone. He's just not here at the moment." Summer explained.

The female seemed to understand. "Oh. Maybe you can tell him to call his mother when you speak to him?"

"Sure. So, you're Kirsten Cohen?"

"Yeah. And you're Summer?"

"I'm a friend of Seth's. Nice to talk to you."

"You too."

"I'll tell him to call you back as soon as possible."

"Thank you, Summer."

Summer went back to the dining room and placed the phone next to Seth. He didn't seem to notice though.

"Aren't you going to ask who it was?"

Seth looked up, for the first time tearing his eyes away from the game. "Sorry. Who was it?"

"It was your mother, Seth. And she wants you to call her back."

He nodded. "Okay. Thanks for answering by the way. I think I've decided what to do. I'm saving my money." He said and gave her the dices.

"Good. But go call your mother. Maybe it's important."

"No, it's not. She calls all the time." Seth said casually and was expecting her to forget about it but Summer kept looking at him. "Okay, I'll call her then."

"Good. You really should."

Kirsten seemed like a very nice mother and the fact that she called him all the time just showed her love for Seth. He shouldn't complain about how she was calling too often. He should be grateful for what he had.

"Hi, mom." Seth remained in front of Summer. She'd expected him to have the conversation in the living room; she didn't want to be in the way. But maybe Seth didn't mind.

"Yeah, that was just Summer…my friend…yes, she is…I am capable to have friends, mom…Yeah, I'm up for tomorrow…yes…love you, too….bye."

Seth made a funny face as he put the phone down. "She's so weird."

Summer was kind of interested about the conversation. "She didn't sound weird. She sounded nice."

"Yeah. Anyway, she just called to remind me about tomorrow."

"What's happening tomorrow?" Summer asked, but then got a little unsure. Maybe it wasn't any of her business.

"We're having this family dinner."

"Oh,"

Seth met her gaze. "Do you want to come?"

Summer nervously looked down. "It's a family dinner, Seth."

"But they won't care. I'm sure they'll be happy. My mom always says 'the more, the merrier'."

"Seth, I don't even know them."

"That's because you haven't met them. Just come. I promise that I'll take good care of you."

"Seth,"

"Please. I really want you to meet them. And them to meet you." Seth pleaded.

"But-"

"No but."

"Fine."

"Good. It's gonna be fun."

Summer wasn't as convinced.

vvvvvvvvvv

"Seth, I'm not so sure about this. Maybe I shouldn't come." Summer anxiously said as they were on their way to Seth's parents.

She had been nervous the whole morning and Seth practically had to drag her out of her apartment.

"Summer, I promise you that it'll be fine."

"Have you told them that I'm coming? Maybe they had planned something and don't want me to come."

"Sum, they'll be fine. They're gonna love you." Seth reassured her.

"Stop saying that."

"Please don't worry."

"I'm just so nervous." Summer almost cried.

"Don't be." Seth placed a hand on her shoulder. "It'll be fine."

Summer closed her eyes and leaned back in her seat. This was not fun. How had she said yes to this?

"We're here." Seth said after a few minutes of silence.

"What!" Summer yelled and sat straight up. "Already?" she asked with a lot weaker voice.

Seth nodded. "Yes. This is the place."

"Wow. It's like a huge…I don't even know." Summer said in awe as she saw the house, for a moment forgetting about her anxiousness. "Your parents must be really rich."

"Yep." Seth just said and jumped out of the car. Summer remained in her seat though. "Aren't you coming?" Seth asked as he opened her door.

"Seth," Summer said, her voice weak like she was about to cry.

"It'll be okay, Sum. I promise." He said and gave her a hug. She hugged him back, burying her head in his neck.

"Okay," she finally said, gathering herself. God, she was being such a baby. Why was this so difficult for her? "Promise me that you won't leave me alone with them."

Seth nodded reassuringly. "I promise. I'll be by your side the whole time. Heck, I even sit next to you at the table."

"You must think that I'm such a baby," Summer started and felt like this wasn't a place for her.

"Hey," Seth forced her to look at him. "I know that this is hard for you, Sum. But I want you to do this, meet them. You'll see that they're nice and they're gonna like you. Nothing's gonna happen."

She nodded and took his hand. "Don't let go."

"I won't." Seth then helped her out of the car and they walked together up to the door. "Ready?"

Summer nodded and squeezed his hand. "As ready as I'll ever be."

"Hello!" Seth called as they walked inside of the huge house. Summer almost froze from the sight. She'd never seen anything like this before; it was so beautiful.

"Seth!" A blonde woman, probably his mother, came out from nowhere and immediately hugged her son. Summer could see that they hadn't met for a while because the hug lasted for a pretty long time.

Seth was the one to pull away first. "Hi, mom."

Kirsten then noticed Summer and gave her a welcoming smile. "Hi!"

"Mom, this is my friend Summer. Summer this is my mom."

Summer managed to utter a 'hi' and smiled uncomfortably.

"We talked over the phone." Kirsten smiled. "It's nice to meet you, Summer."

"You too. I hope its okay-" Summer started but was almost immediately interrupted by Kirsten who seemed to know what Summer was trying to say.

"Of course. It's so nice that Seth brought a friend."

"I told you," Seth mouthed, only for Summer to see. He then placed an arm around her waist and led her into the kitchen.

The kitchen was just as nice; very homey and big. She couldn't even imagine how it would be like to live in a house like this. Everything was just so fancy and huge.

Three new people stood by the counter; one older who she figured was Seth's dad. He looked nice although Summer couldn't help but notice his eyebrows. They were a one of a kind. It made him look a little scary.

Summer mentally kicked herself. You did not think badly about new people, especially not Seth's dad.

Next to the man where two younger people; Ryan and his girlfriend. They looked good together; like one of those perfect couples.

"Hi, everybody!" Seth said and waved. "I want you to meet Summer."

Summer suddenly felt very uncomfortable, like they were all watching her. She hated that; she felt so out of place. "Hi," she said. "It's nice to meet you."

Summer was terrified, but polite. That was just one thing that she always wanted to be; she did not want to be rude.

"Hello, Summer." Seth's father extended his hand, which Summer accepted. "I'm Sandy, Seth's father."

"And, Sum. This is Ryan and Marissa." Seth introduced them. Marissa immediately said hello, smiling brightly.

She was beautiful. Tall, slim and with a pretty face. You could really see that she was rich; she looked like a movie star in Summer's eyes.

"Nice to meet you. Seth's been talking a lot about you." Ryan said and shook her hand. Summer worriedly looked over at Seth.

"Oh, don't worry. I only told him what a great friend you are." Seth quickly said and went to hug his family.

She smiled; he was adorable.

vvvvvvvvv

The visit had gone pretty well. At least this far.

Summer had talked some with them all, mostly Kirsten and Marissa. They were both so nice, almost too nice for Summer to handle. She felt a little awkward around them but they didn't seem to think so.

Seth had kept his promise and didn't leave her side, except when she told him it was okay. Summer wondered if his family noticed how instable she was.

She tried her best to hide it all, she always did. She smiled a lot and tried to talk, be interesting. But somehow, she always felt like she couldn't hide it; like the rest of the world always knew.

"So, Summer, how did you meet Seth?" Kirsten asked after dinner, when the three girls sat in the sofa while the boys were somewhere in the backyard. Summer had let Seth go spend some time with his brother and father. She didn't want him to feel like he had to be by her side the whole time, even if she would want him to.

"You didn't meet in a comic store, right?" Marissa asked and laughed.

Summer nervously spoke. "No, we met at the pier actually."

"The pier?" Both Marissa and Kirsten seemed very interested.

So, Summer had to explain. "Yeah. He asked me what time it was and then we went for coffee."

She couldn't tell them the whole truth. That had to stay between her and Seth. She didn't want them to know.

"That's so romantic." Marissa exclaimed and leaned back into the cushions.

Summer quickly spoke, maybe sounding a little harsh. "Seth and I are just friends."

"Oh, I just thought that…" Marissa started, obviously embarrassed. "Sorry."

Kirsten had probably believed the same because she stayed quiet.

Awkward silence.

"So, I thought I'd go shopping tomorrow. Do you want to come?" Marissa said, breaking the ice.

Kirsten nodded. "Sure. I could really use something new."

"Summer?" Marissa asked.

"Um," she started. She couldn't go. She didn't have any money to go shop with these two; they probably went to all the expensive places. "I don't know."

She then quickly stood up. "Will you excuse me?"

_Please review!_


	6. Chapter 6

_Chapter six, people. I'm very glad that you enjoy this story and even though this isn't my favourite chapter I hope you'll review!_

Seth was really enjoying himself; it was a while ago he'd met them all. And at times like these, when they were talking and laughing like they used to, he missed that. He missed being a kid and always having them there. Now, when he lived by himself, there weren't many people to speak to. No one there to hear his new jokes.

So, to be able to just hang out with Ryan again and his dad was great. He was also glad that Summer could talk to Marissa and his mom; she was being a lot braver than he'd expected. He'd tell her that later, how proud he was.

"Seth?" Kirsten came out with Marissa shortly behind, looking quite concerned.

The guys looked up from where they sat around the table, having some beers and talking. "Where's Summer?" Seth immediately asked, getting worried as he only saw the two of them.

"She went to the bathroom I think." Marissa said. "We asked her if she wanted to come shopping with us. I thought it was a good idea but…"

Seth understood. "Its okay, Marissa," he said, knowing that they couldn't possibly know. "I'll be right back."

Seth went inside, leaving his family confused and worried behind.

"Summer?" he asked as he knocked on the bathroom door. "Are you okay?"

She didn't answer so Seth felt on the door; it wasn't locked.

"Do you ever lock any doors?" he joked as he went inside, only to find Summer on the floor with a blank look on her face.

"Wanna tell me what happened?" Seth sat down next to her and carefully looked at her.

He recognised that look but still he couldn't figure out what she was thinking or feeling. He only knew that it wasn't good.

Summer shook her head and trembled, a sign for hold me. So, Seth pulled her close to him and heard her fight the tears.

"I'm such a mess!" she complained before bursting into tears. She leaned closer to Seth, crying into his shirt like there was no tomorrow. He could actually feel her frustration as she clenched his shirt in her hands and pushed her face further into it.

"Summer, you've been so strong and brave today. You're doing really well." Seth said, trying to comfort her best he could by gently patting her back.

"I'm not. Can't you see that I'm falling apart here?" Summer asked, swallowing back a hiccup. She really hated being so weak all the time. "They probably think I'm crazy." Summer bitterly said and coughed onto Seth's neck.

"You're not crazy, Sum."

"Don't lie."

Seth changed position, placing Summer between his legs. "You need to be positive, Summer. Don't think like that because then, you're gonna get crazy. Try to see things from the good side. Instead of thinking that you're weak because you're crying right now, think of all the hours that you spent together with people you'd never met before and didn't cry."

"I'm not like that. I'm not a positive person." Summer stubbornly said, angrily wiping at her tears.

"Then let me help you."

"Seth, you don't have to do anything to me. You don't owe me anything; on the contrary. I owe you so much."

"I want to help you and you don't owe me anything. You have no idea how glad I am that I've met you."

"I don't?" Summer asked, sounding a little hopeful.

"No. Summer, you are my friend and friends take care of each other."

She sniffled. "But I'm an impossible case."

"You're not." Seth reassured her, smiling. "Now, let me help you. Please?" Seth wasn't giving in, he just wasn't.

He looked so hopeful and so cute that she couldn't possibly say no. So she nodded against him, taking his hand into hers.

"Okay. I'll let you help me," she said while still sniffling. "But only because you're my only friend. And I kind of don't want to lose you."

"You won't lose me." Seth said and hugged her tightly against his body.

vvvvvvvvv

"Seth?"

Everybody looked at him as soon as he walked outside. They were still around the table in the backyard, looking awfully concerned. Seth figured that his mom and Marissa had explained what happened because they all looked worried; everyone in a different way.

"Is she alright?" Marissa asked, feeling most guilty.

Seth nodded calmly and sat down in an empty chair. "Summer's fine. But I'm gonna take her home."

"I'm really sorry, Seth."

Seth smiled at Marissa and placed a hand on her arm. "Don't worry about it, okay?"

"Just let her know," she pleaded.

"I will but it wasn't anything you did. Summer isn't feeling good, that's all." Seth said, making them all even more worried. "I'm gonna go back to her now, but it was really nice to see you all again."

Kirsten stood up and hugged him. "I love you, Seth. And don't wait too long before you come visit us again."

"I won't."

"And you can bring Summer anytime. She's a nice girl."

Seth nodded thankfully. "Thanks, dad. I'll let her know."

And after hugging them all he went back inside to where Summer was waiting for him.

vvvvvvvvvv

"Therapy?" Summer said as she held the brochure Seth had given her in her hands.

He calmly took it from her hands and placed it on the table. He then took her hands in his, looking into her eyes. Summer would have looked away but she had by now learned that Seth always waited until she met his gaze anyway so this time she stared back at him.

"Just try it," he said. "You want to feel better, right?"

Summer nodded, knowing that he was right. "But I won't know what to say."

"They're professionals and they're gonna help you." She still looked unsure. "Why don't you try a little on me?"

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"Tell me what it's like. Talk about it."

"Seth, I can't."

"Then you need to go. Do it for you."

"Alright," she said but deep down didn't feel like doing it at all. She didn't want to bother someone with her problems.

"Have you thought anything about shopping with my mom and Marissa yet?" Seth carefully asked, knowing that that subject was very sensitive.

Summer shrugged. "I can't go with them, Seth. I don't have money to go to the places where they shop."

"I'll give you my credit card."

"I can't let you do that, Seth. You don't have to pay for me."

"I know. I just want you to be able to have some fun."

Summer smiled and rested her head on his shoulder. "I know you do."

"And not to brag or anything but I do have money and I don't need them all." Seth said totally sincere, showing Summer that he actually wanted to do this for her.

"Letting you pay for my therapy is enough, more than enough."

"Okay," he said. "I won't force you, but let me know if you change your mind."

"I will," Summer replied. "Sorry by the way."

"For what?"

"You know, letting my problems affect your family. I never wanted them to know."

"I didn't tell them anything. And I won't if you don't want me to."

"I don't but it's not like they haven't already noticed. I mean, they just asked me if I wanted to come shopping; totally normal. And I couldn't handle that. What do you think they think of me, Seth?" Summer sadly asked. "They know."

Seth knew that his family probably was very worried about not knowing and he knew that by now they probably had billions of ideas. But he'd never betray Summer and give her a reason not to trust him.

"Do you want to watch a movie?" Seth asked after some time of just sitting there, completely quiet.

"Sure." Summer nodded and let Seth get up from the couch.

vvvvvvvvv

Summer's first therapy session quickly approached, without her being able to stop it. The last couple of days had been kind of horrible; she'd practically been a wreck. Seth had done his best to support her, trying to give her a positive view of it or if that didn't work take her mind off it. They'd been out a lot, taking day trips or had lunch in restaurants. Anything to make Summer feel better.

But now here she was, one windy September day, standing outside of the office afraid to go in. Everything was so frightening; grey and strange. So not welcoming.

But, she'd promised Seth and he was paying for this so she couldn't just skip it. She had to pull herself together and just walk in there.

After telling the receptionist about her meeting she sat down and waited. Two other people were there, one older woman and a man seeming to be in his thirties. It felt good to not be alone but at the same time she was embarrassed.

She was now officially letting other people know that she had a problem. No matter how common everyone said that it was, Summer could never stop feeling embarrassed.

"Mr. Simpson," a woman came out from nowhere and seconds later she disappeared with the man. Now they were only two.

Summer nervously fumbled with her fingers and looked around. She thought about reading a paper but was too nervous, she was too nervous to do anything. Maybe she'd even throw up.

The woman came and called out a name again, leaving Summer alone in the waiting room. She just wanted this to be over with.

_Please, someone call my name! _

And as to have answered her prayers, someone did call her name, just seconds later.

Summer's head started to spin and she knew there was no way back; she had to go inside and meet her fears.

So, she fallowed the woman but as they entered a small corridor Summer stopped. "Can I just have a minute by myself?" she quickly asked, knowing what she wanted to do.

"Okay, you can just walk into that room when you're ready."

She disappeared, leaving Summer just outside the therapist's door. Summer sat down in a chair and brought her cell out.

Seth quickly answered. "Summer?"

"Yeah, hi."

"Isn't your session starting now?"

"Any minute. I just wanted to call you first."

"Oh. Okay." Seth said. "How are you feeling?"

"Nervous."

"It'll be okay. We can do something fun afterwards."

"Yeah. Will you come pick me up?"

"Of course. In an hour."

"Good. And Seth?"

"Yeah,"

"I just wanted to say thanks."

She knew that she wouldn't have to explain. He knew.

"You're welcome."

Summer smiled brightly to herself and sat there biting her lip. And this time not in a nervous way. "I better go,"

"Yeah. Good luck, Summer!"

"Thanks. See you soon."

"Can't wait,"

Summer put the phone down with a smile and then walked towards the door, feeling ready. If she didn't feel like doing this to herself she could always do it for Seth.

_I am soon gonna update A Heart's Desire. I haven't forgotten about that story._

_Now, over to this one; what did you think? I'm almost finished with the next chapter so if you're lucky I'll post more very soon._

_Please review! _


	7. Chapter 7

_I've had huge problems with the internet and I'm so sorry that this took longer than I'd promised. You so deserved better with your incredible reviews._

_I do reply to all reviews I can but of course I want to thank you who aren't signed as well. I appreciate all reviews and I wish that I could reply to you all individually and thank you. Because reviews are great! _

_Thank you all for taking the time to leave a quick comment!_

"What is it that you don't like about apples?" Summer asked as they walked out of the grocery store, each with two bags.

Seth shrugged. "It's just that when I was little I found a worm in one. And after that I just can't eat them."

Summer laughed. "That's so grouse."

"I know!"

"Then I can understand why you never buy apples." Summer said. They had had a small argument, not anything serious, in the store about apples and oranges. It had ended with them buying both.

"So, you have to eat all the apples we bought." Seth told her, his voice cracking.

"I'll just make an apple pie." Summer replied ingeniously and continued to walk towards the car. "Do you eat that?"

Seth tried to look unmoved. "Sometimes. But you have to inspect the apples very carefully."

"I will," Summer said and grinned.

"Look! Marissa's over there." Seth made a gesture; as good as he could with two bags, over to a tall girl locking her car.

Summer nodded. "Yeah,"

The blonde had obviously seen the two of them because she quickly made her way to their car. "Hi!"

"Hi, Marissa." Seth said and placed the groceries in the car. He then took Summer's two from her so that she could greet Marissa.

"Hi, Marissa," she said and smiled at the taller girl.

Marissa smiled as well, happy to see her brother in law with his friend. Summer always thought how weird it was that Marissa always smiled. Was she like the happiest person on earth or what?

"It's good to see you two again. I see you've been grocery shopping." A natural conversationalist, too.

"Yeah, we were out of food." Seth explained and closed the trunk.

"As usual." Summer added, making Marissa laugh. She had a cute laughter.

"I was just on my way in."

"Alone?" Seth asked and looked weirdly at Summer.

Marissa nodded. "Yeah. I didn't feel like hanging out with my mom so I told her that I had to go grocery shopping."

"Grocery shopping? Ryan says that he always has to do that." Seth said confused.

"Yeah. Well, he does. But I couldn't say to my mom that I was going shopping. Then she would have come."

Seth laughed. "Her mom can be a little tedious," he explained to Summer who didn't really understand the funny side of this.

"Oh,"

"Would you like some company, Marissa?"

"You guys want to go shopping?" she asked hopefully, if possible smiling even more brightly.

"Well, I should get the food home," Seth gestured at the car. "But, Summer can stay."

Summer quickly looked at Seth, not having expected him to push her into doing something in front of another person.

"That would be great!" Marissa exclaimed and made it impossible for Summer to say no. She hated situations like these. "If you want to, that will say," Marissa worriedly added, referring to the last time she'd asked Summer to come shopping with her.

"Summer?" Seth asked, smiling as well. Something in his eyes told her though that it was okay for her to say no. And somewhere Summer felt that she could, if she wanted to.

"I'll stay," she quickly said though and was even a little surprised herself. But she needed to do this. It couldn't be that bad, right?

"Great!" Marissa exclaimed, looking at Summer. "I can drive you back later."

Seth nodded and fumbled with his wallet. "Take this and buy yourself something nice," he told Summer and gave her a comforting hug. "You deserve it," he whispered in her ear.

"Thanks," Summer smiled and turned to Marissa.

The taller girl locked arms with Summer and started to walk them away from Seth. "This is gonna be so much fun, Summer."

Terrified, but determined to do this, Summer just smiled and agreed.

vvvvvvvvv

"This would look great on you." Marissa said and showed Summer a green dress with silver details on.

It was gorgeous, Summer couldn't think anything else, but she'd never even tried on anything like that before. Marissa had taken her to places Summer never even had known existed. She had, in her early teens, just walked around in expensive stores and looked at all the clothes. But as she'd realised that she'd never be able to buy anything in there, or try it on, she'd stopped.

And now she realised how much she'd missed it. The clothes were amazing and Summer wanted to try everything on.

But, being who she was Summer didn't touch anything or pick anything to try on. So therefore Marissa gave her tons of things and showed Summer the dressing rooms. Summer was glad for that.

"You think?" Summer asked and eyed the dress, so beautiful that she didn't dare to look at the prize.

Marissa nodded. "Yeah. I think you'd look great in this colour."

Summer went to the dressing room, smiling while holding the dress in her hands. She had expected herself to be all scared while shopping with Marissa, but she wasn't. It was fun and Summer never wanted to go home.

It was crazy, so crazy that Summer while inside the booth had to pinch herself.

"Can I see?" Marissa asked from outside and Summer stepped outside, kind of shyly. She felt a little weird; she hadn't worn a dress for years and she was slightly embarrassed about her pale body.

"Wow," Marissa said and eyed Summer. "It's perfect on you."

"Really?" Summer said, not being able to hide the big smile on her face.

"Yes! You have to buy it, Summer."

Summer awkwardly looked down. She had never even thought about buying it, just try it on. "Oh, I don't know. I bet it's very expensive."

"Who cares? Seth's paying, right? And I know that he'd want you to have this."

"Do you really think that I should?"

"I do. Do you like the dress? I mean, I know I do but if you don't like it…"

Summer quickly interrupted. "I love it! It's the best dress in the whole world."

"Then what are you waiting for?" Marissa asked.

Summer smiled and stepped inside the dressing room again. She loved this dress.

After buying the dress the two girls decided to go and have some coffee before continuing. Marissa showed Summer a cosy little café where they found a table and sat down.

"Thanks for letting me come with you today, Marissa." Summer said as the coffee had arrived.

Marissa nodded. "I'm just glad to have some company. And by the way I think you have a very good sense of style."

"You do?"

"Yeah. You know what looks good and what doesn't. You must be a shopper, too, right?"

Summer shook her head. "Actually I don't shop very often and this is the first time I've bought anything in here." Summer confessed. She always found the smaller, less expensive places.

"Then you're a natural."

Summer grinned. "Now I just have to find an excuse to wear the dress. It's so fancy."

"Living in Newport you should need it. Charity events are a weekly thing."

"You have charity events?" Summer asked, a little surprised. She had seen them in movies but she never thought that she'd actually meet people who went to things like that.

"Yeah. All the time. Seth hasn't been on many lately though. Maybe he should bring you."

"Maybe," Summer said unsurely.

"It would be nice to see more of you. I've never really thought that Seth's friends are very interesting but I definitely think that he's found someone good this time."

Summer smiled and pinched herself again.

This all couldn't be true. She was having coffee with one of those girls she'd always looked away while meeting; always admired. And she had a friend, a best friend. Seth.

"So, where do you want to go next?" Marissa interrupted and again showed those perfect white teeth.

vvvvvvvvvv

The moment Summer walked inside of Seth's apartment she heard him call for her from the kitchen.

"Hi Seth!"

He was cooking dinner and Summer giggled as she noticed the flour on his left cheek. "Hi! Did you have fun?"

"Actually I did, a lot of fun."

She placed her bags on a chair and leaned back against the counter to see what he was cooking.

"That's great. Marissa can be a little too much sometimes but overall she's nice," Seth scratched his chin and got even more flour in his face, but didn't seem to notice at all.

"Yes, she is." Summer agreed and eyed him with a grin on her face. "You're making dinner?"

"Yeah," he proudly said. He didn't cook very often; he was more of a takeout person. Suddenly getting a bit nervous he asked. "You want to stay, right?"

"Sure. And I love it when you cook." He was being so cute, she couldn't help but smile at him.

Seth smirked. "Can I see what you've bought?"

Summer nodded enthusiastically and was about to pull it out from the bags when he stopped her. "I want to see it on you, silly. Now, go change!"

"Alright,"

Summer came back into the kitchen a few minutes later wearing the green dress she loved so much. She was a little unsure of how he'd react; it was after all kind of expensive and maybe he wouldn't think she needed anything like that.

Seth was standing by the counter, cutting some bread, when he saw her. He just stopped and put the knife down, looking her up and down.

His eyes seemed to grow twice its size and with the flour still on his face and the apron he looked pretty adorable in Summer's eyes.

"What?" Summer asked after some time of complete silence. She was starting to worry.

Seth kept standing there, just looking at her.

"Seth?" Summer said and wanted to disappear out of the room. Why didn't he say anything?

He didn't think that the dress was anything for her.

"I just…you…well…you're just..." Seth mumbled. "You're amazingly beautiful, Summer."

As soon as he'd uttered those words Summer relaxed and realised that she'd been holding her breath. "Really?" she asked and he nodded.

"Beautiful,"

"So you think I should keep it? The dress,"

"Of course. Why wouldn't you?"

"I don't know."

"Then keep it. It looks gorgeous on you but then again everything does," he quickly said, as if he was nervous.

And Seth who never showed her any nervousness.

Was he flirting with her?

No, he couldn't be. He saw her as a friend, maybe a sister. But, still she blushed.

Seth cleared his voice. "Did you buy anything else?"

"Oh, yeah I did. You want to see?"

vvvvvvvvv

"Are you sure, Seth?"

"Of course I am. I asked you."

Summer nodded understandingly, tucking some of her dark hair behind her ear. "Yeah, but I've been staying here a lot and I don't want to-"

"Summer, I love to have you around. Really," Seth interrupted, hoping that she would stay.

Summer felt like she could drown in his brown eyes, so pleading and so kind. "Well, I guess I'll stay then," she whispered.

A smile spread on his face. "Good and maybe we should fix the guestroom soon,"

"You have a guestroom?" Summer asked, confused. Wouldn't she have noticed a guestroom?

"Yes. But at the moment I'm using it to put all the stuff I don't know where else to have in," Seth explained.

"Oh, that's the room with the surfboard in?"

"Yeah, I've never really bothered to fix it; the room,"

"But I can sleep here on the sofa. It's comfortable," Summer said as she knew how much things he had in the room.

"I know but I thought I'd give you a proper bed to sleep in. That way you don't have to make bed all the time. And I was going to have it as a guestroom; I've just been lazy."

Summer leaned back into the cushions and brought a pillow into her lap. "Okay,"

"But I don't really feel like doing that tonight," Seth confessed.

"Me neither. I'm pretty tired," Summer agreed and just now realised how tired she really was.

"After a day of shopping with Marissa I can understand that,"

"It was actually really fun," Summer smiled; she still couldn't really understand that she'd been out shopping with another person. She hadn't done that for years.

"Yeah?"

Summer nodded and suddenly remembered that she never would have been able to buy anything without Seth's help. "Thank you so much for the dress by the way. I really love it,"

"Hey, no problem. I'm just glad that you had a great time." Seth told her with a sincere voice; he was just happy to see her smile more and more.

"Thanks,"

A silence fallowed and the two stared at the TV screen .

"Movie?" Set suggested.

Summer laughed and looked at him. "We see a lot of movies, don't we?"

"We don't have to. What do you want to do?" Seth quickly said, afraid that she didn't like movies at all. Maybe she just was scared to tell him because he loved movies.

Summer immediately replied. "No. I want to; I like watching movies with you. Your comments to everything are very interesting. Makes me see the movies in a whole new perspective."

Seth laughed. "Then another movie it is."

_This chapter has been finished for some time and it was so much fun to write. I will not make any promises now since I might not be able to keep them but if you guys review I'll have so much inspiration to write and I'll be able to update so much faster. _

_Please leave a review!_


	8. Chapter 8

_I'm so busy right now with school but here's a new chapter. _

_Thank you a lot for the reviews! You're so awesome!_

Everything was dark and quiet. No sound except a low buzzingfrom the refrigerator was heard.

Summer was all tucked in at the couch, trying to get some sleep. She'd woken up an hour ago, having had a dream. She used to wake up in the middle of the night but she was always, or most of the times, able to go back to sleep.

Not tonight though.

She had no idea why, but tonight she couldn't sleep. She couldn't find a comfortable position and she couldn't stop thinking. The thoughts were circling round in her head and most of those thoughts included Seth.

Summer couldn't help but imagine him sleeping. He was just a few metres away, in his room.

Changing her position, and laying on her side, Summer spotted a picture on the coffee table. It was dark but her eyes had gotten used to it so she could see who were on the picture. It was Seth and she.

It felt so strange. It was the first picture she was one as an adult, and together with another person, smiling. They sat on a bench down the pier, close to the place where they'd first met. Seth wasn't holding her hand or anything but he was leaning his head close to hers in a way that no one never had done before.

Seth was a lot of firsts for Summer; in a good way. She hadn't yet experienced anything bad around him.

Yet she did not regret having met him. And strangely enough she didn't even worry as much any more about how she affected him. He said that he wanted her to be his friend, so why not trust that he knew what he wanted? Yet she hadn't hurt him. Not that Summer was aware of anyway.

Realising that she wouldn't be able to sleep at the moment she got up and decided to have a glass of water.

As she drank some she saw Seth's shirt hanging over a chair. He wasn't a very neat person but then again, she wasn't either. That shirt for sure didn't bother her at all but not having anything else to do, she quietly walked over to Seth's bedroom with the shirt in her hand.

His door was closed and she couldn't hear any sound through it; Seth didn't snore. She smiled and carefully opened the door, peeking in.

It was darker in there, so dark that she couldn't see anything. She thought about lighting the lamp but realised that she didn't want Seth to wake up and find her in his room. How creepy would that be?

So she carefully walked over to the place where she knew he had an armchair with lots of clothes in. Maybe not careful enough though because she tripped over something and fell flat on the floor.

"Ow," Summer sat up and rubbed her arm. She threw what must bee a towel away angrily as it was the towel she'd tripped on.

She then heard a muffled groan from the bed and put both hands over her mouth. She was such a moron!

Not daring to move from where she sat on the floor Summer was relived when she didn't hear anything else. Maybe he was a deep sleeper.

But suddenly the light turned on. "Summer?"

Seth's voice was sleepy and a little slurry but that was to be expected since he'd been asleep just seconds ago. He sat straight up and Summer rose from the floor, seeing the towel lying next to him.

"Sorry," she started with a shaky voice. "I just thought you'd want your shirt." Pointing to the shirt on his armchair she hoped that she wouldn't need to explain things further.

Looking at her, standing in a pair of sweatpants and a too big T-shirt with her dark hair on one side of her shoulders, Seth smiled. "I see. Is that the reason of why you threw a towel on my face?"

"No!" Summer quickly replied. "I didn't mean to, I just tripped on it and didn't think. I'm sorry."

"It's okay." Seth told her, not looking the tiniest bit angry. He pattered on the spot next to him, gesturing for her to sit down. "Why were you up anyway? You didn't get up to give me my shirt, did you?"

Summer shook her head from where she sat next to him on his bed, focusing hard on not sitting too close to him but not too far away either. "I couldn't sleep, that's all," she mumbled while looking down in her lap.

"Oh," Seth tried to see her face. "Is everything alright?"

Summer nodded and met his gaze, giving him a weak look. "I'm fine."

"Good."

They both went quiet while remaining sitting next to each other on his bed.

"I should go and let you get back to sleep," Summer said after a few moments of silence, feeling quite embarrassed.

Seth seemed to agree because he told her goodnight with a small smile on his lips.

"Night,"

Summer went back to the couch and crept under the sheet and the amazingly comfortable bedcover. It had a different smell than her own sheets and sometimes Summer would pull the bedclothes tighter around her and imagine that maybe Seth had been sleeping in the same ones. She'd fall asleep feeling warm and secure, almost as if she had Seth's arms around her.

This night was one of those.

vvvvvvvvvv

The next morning Seth walked into the kitchen rubbing his eyes and still in his sleeping clothes, a T-shirt and a pair of boxers. He hadn't slept very well during the night.

"Morning!" a joyful Summer greeted him. She was fully dressed and was, as Seth noticed, wearing some of her new clothes she'd bought together with Marissa.

Flopping down onto a chair he yawned. "Morning, Sum."

"Coffee?" she offered, holding up a cup of freshly made coffee, black and hot just as he wanted it.

"Thanks, this is just what I need," he said and accepted the cup, immediately taking a sip.

Summer smiled and sat down in front of him, also with a cup of coffee in her hands. She was glad that everything was just as it always was; everything felt comfortable and good.

As they sipped their coffee Summer suddenly was reminded of that night. They'd been sitting quietly together, drinking coffee.

She'd been so fragile, so depressed. But yet that had been one of the best days of her entire life. Because she'd met Seth.

And he had saved her.

"What are you thinking about?" Seth asked and drew her back to reality.

"That night," she said and looked down into her cup, just like she'd done then.

Seth nodded and scratched his chin. "Oh, do you want to talk about it?"

Summer looked up at him with glassy eyes. "I'd rather not but thanks."

"Sure," Seth quickly said.

"I should go make bed. I don't want to be late," Summer excused herself and got up, taking the coffee with her.

Seth knew better than to stop her and force her to talk. He believed that she should come to him when she was ready.

After all, the only thing he wanted for her was to feel like he was there, whenever she needed him.

vvvvvvvvvv

Seth stopped just in front of the building and turned to Summer, who looked less and less nervous every time they did this. She smiled shyly and leant over to hug him.

Seth wrapped his arms around her and held her close to him for several minutes. Then she pulled away, looking a little embarrassed.

"You'll be okay,"

"Yeah," she tucked some hair behind her ear. "See you later," Summer said and jumped out of the car turning around one last time to look at him.

He smiled reassuringly and waited until she was inside before he drove off.

Summer walked straight up to her floor and almost immediately was able to walk inside her therapist's office. She had by now learned how it all worked.

The office was just like one of those you saw on movies. Dark furniture, neutral paintings and of course tissues next to the sofa. The whole atmosphere was actually not very homey or relaxing at all.

Her therapist though wasn't like one she'd imagined. Summer had imagined this old man with grey hair but that was completely wrong. Her therapist was female and not much over thirty, Christie.

"Hello, Summer." Christie said from where she sat in the armchair, a smile on her face as usual when Summer entered.

"Hi,"

"How are you today?"

"Pretty good."

As Summer was situated on the sofa Christie started to talk again. "Good. I thought we'd continue on what we talked about last week."

"The other people thing?"

Christie nodded. "We talked about your relations to other people. And now I'd like to know about some specific people, the important people in your life."

"Um," Summer started uncertainly.

"Tell me about your family. How are your relations with them?"

Summer shrugged. "I don't have any contact with my parents."

"Tell me about your childhood."

Summer thought for a few seconds; where would she start? "They divorced when I was little. I think it was because neither of them wanted to settle down, with a kid and everything. They were pretty young when they had me." She took a quick pause. "My dad was the one who left first though so mom was stuck with me."

Christie wrote something down. "Where did your father go?"

"I don't really know. My mom told me that he went to Europe."

"He never made any contact with you?"

"No," Summer said with a strong voice.

Christie wrote a quick note again before asking the next question. "So, you lived together with your mother then?"

"Yeah, we lived in the old house. Hank used to be there a lot though."

"Hank?"

"My mom's...you know."

"New husband?"

"Yeah,"

"Were you and your mother close?"

"Not really. We never talked; we just avoided each other as much as we could."

"She never took you shopping or read bedtime stories?"

Summer sadly shook her head but trying to smile even though it hurt so much to remember. "Sometimes my grandma let me come to her house. We'd bake cookies and she taught me how to play the piano."

"That's nice,"

"She died though. When I was nine."

Christie then changed the subject. "What about friends then. Did you have many friends?"

"I've never had a real friend. No one bothered to speak to me. Only Seth has wanted to be my friend."

"Seth. He's very important to you, isn't he?"

"Of course he is. He's the only person I've ever felt comfortable around. He's the reason of why I'm alive." Christie nodded. Summer had told her everything about that night when her life changed. She'd heard a lot about Seth.

"He's been helping you a lot."

Summer made a small nod and noticed how her thoughts once again filled with Seth. "He has. Sometimes I even feel guilty because he's doing so much for me, you know? And he's amazing. But what do I give him in return?"

"Friendship, Summer. You of all people should know that friends are important. You're his friend."

"But he doesn't talk to me about things like I talk to him."

"You do things together,"

"I'm afraid that I'm holding him back. He's letting me stay at his apartment and he's completely focused on me all the time."

"You should talk to him, Summer. Tell him how you feel."

"I wouldn't know what to say,"

"Try."

"I'll talk to him later."

"Good. You need to let him know,"

"Right,"

vvvvvvvvvvv

"How was your day?" Summer asked Seth over the phone later that night. Seth had taken her home just after her therapy on her request.

"Good. I met Ryan so we talked some,"

"Oh,"

Seth took a deep breath as to gather himself. He then quickly spoke. "There's this party this weekend by the way. It's at my parent's house. Do you want to come?"

"A Newport party?"

"Yeah. I don't usually go but I haven't shown myself for ages and I'm actually starting to believe the things my mom always tell me about the newpsies thinking I'm dead."

Summer laughed; partly because Seth's nervousness and partly because of the newpsies. Seth had told her all about the newpsies.

"Think about it," Seth sweetly said.

"I will."

"So, you working tomorrow?"

"Yeah. You?"

"Yeah, me too. I'll call you though,"

"Okay. I'll have an answer," Summer promised but already knew what her answer would be.

"I think you'd like it and this would be a perfect opportunity to wear your new dress."

Summer blushed, happy to speak over the phone since he couldn't see.

_Please leave a review..._


	9. Chapter 9

_I told many of you that I would update this week and here it is; chapter nine. I wouldn't have posted this now but since you all gave me such amazing reviews I just had to. So, this is for you guys. Enjoy!_

Marissa and Summer were in the bathroom, the blonde curling Summer's hair into soft, beautiful curls that fell down on her shoulders perfectly. Looking into the mirror Summer couldn't help but smile. It felt nice to be taken cared of.

"So, are you excited about your first Newport party?"

"Kind of. I'm nervous though," Summer confessed as Marissa finished with the hair, looking at her in the mirror.

"You have nothing to be nervous about. You're gonna look just gorgeous."

Summer smiled. "What are you gonna wear?"

"A new Chanel dress," Marissa answered with enthusiasm, admiring her work of Summer's hair. "You wanna to see?"

"Sure,"

Marissa led the way to hers and Ryan's bedroom where a beautiful dress hung on the door. "Wow, that dress is to kill for!" Summer exclaimed and went to touch the silky material.

"We're gonna match colours," the tall girl pointed at the dark green colour on her dress. She then giggled and took it down from the door. "Let's get dressed."

Summer quickly fallowed, enjoying getting ready together with a friend. Everything was so much more fun and she loved being in contact with this glamorous side of life where everything felt like a dream.

vvvvvvvvvv

19.17.

Looking out over the big crowd of people, Seth sighed. He was getting worried that Summer wouldn't come.

Maybe he should have been the one to take her; that way he'd be able to pep her before and tell her that this night was going to be fun. She had insisted on going together with Marissa though, while he went with Ryan.

"Man, are you okay? You look all pale," Seth had completely forgotten about Ryan who stood next to him, now looking quite concerned.

Seth blinked. "No, I'm fine. I was just seeing if Summer had arrived. She's a little late,"

"Well, Marissa's always late. You know how women are. And it's fifteen minutes; nothing to worry about."

Seth just nodded. "Seth, what's this thing about Summer?" Ryan asked after some time of watching his brother stare out over the people, desperately searching.

"Nothing. I'm just worried because she's late."

"No, you're not."

Seth turned his gaze over to his dear brother for the first time. "What are you talking about?"

Ryan shrugged and casually spoke. "You like her,"

"I don't like her," Seth laughed, not sounding so convincing though.

"You do, man. You like her a lot."

Seth shook his head. "You're insane, man."

To that Ryan did not reply. He only shrugged again and gave Seth one of his looks.

"I'm not into her!" Seth defended himself, frustrated that Ryan didn't believe him.

"Then tell me that you've never imagined her naked,"

Seth half laughed/ half yelled. "What!"

"You heard me," his brother calmly said.

Seth tried to look innocent. "Nope,"

"Seth,"

"I am not into Summer. She's my…" Seth suddenly stopped, becoming awfully quiet.

Ryan looked confused and was about to say something but as he saw both Marissa and Summer walk toward them he gave up on their conversation as well.

The girls were both gorgeous.

"Hi," Marissa said as they stopped just in front of them. Summer made a little wave and blushed.

"Hi, honey." Ryan gave his girlfriend a kiss and smiled as he turned towards Summer. "Hi, Summer. It's good to see you again,"

She nodded politely and accepted his kiss on her cheek. "You both look gorgeous by the way, don't they Seth?" Ryan said, maybe intentionally.

"Yeah," Seth stuttered and met Summer's gaze. Her hair was all shiny and curled into perfect waves. It fell down on her bare shoulders and made her skin look even paler. The dress fitted her perfectly and she was by far the most beautiful person in the room in Seth's eyes.

He saw all these beautiful people with pretty dresses but none of them could compare to Summer tonight. She was breathtaking but that was just not something that Seth would admit to anyone.

"Hi, Seth," she said shyly.

"Summer," was all Seth was able to get out.

Ryan and Marissa looked at their friends and smiled to each other. "Hon, why don't we go get something to drink?" Marissa said and dragged Ryan away.

After the couple had left Summer anxiously looked at Seth. Why did everything have to get so awkward sometimes?

"So, I was starting to get a little worried when I didn't see you here," Seth started, not knowing what else to say.

"Oh, well it took forever to get ready and we kind of lost track of time." Summer quickly explained suddenly looking anywhere but at Seth.

It was weird how they so many times could talk about whatever for hours while they at times like this were pushed into awkward silences.

Seth cleared his throat. "You look very nice,"

"Thanks. So do you."

"Want to say hi to my parents?" Seth quickly asked, feeling like he would die if he didn't say anything.

"Sure,"

Kirsten and Sandy Cohen stood just near the windows with two glasses in their hands. They'd probably said hi to most guests by now.

"Mom! Dad!" Seth gave them each a hug.

"Seth, I'm so happy to see you here." Kirsten said and smiled. "And you brought Summer,"

Eying her up and down his parents smiled brightly. "Welcome, Summer. It's so good to see you here again," Sandy said kissing her cheek.

"You're beautiful," Kirsten smiled and leaned in for a hug.

_A hug. From Seth's mom. _

Summer hugged her back and felt her eyes start to get glassy; she'd never been hugged like this. She'd never even been liked by a friend's parent. She'd never felt this welcomed.

When they'd pulled apart Seth smiled; he could see how happy Summer was and by locking eyes with his mother for just a second or two he saw that she'd noticed too.

"Let's go get something to drink, Sum," Seth said and offered his arm.

Summer gladly accepted and placed her small arm into his, letting him lead her to the bar.

Somehow things weren't as awkward anymore.

vvvvvvvvvvv

"So, Summer, I've never seen you here before," the middle-aged woman said as she places a loose strand of hair back behind her ear.

Summer smiled politely, tired of these kinds of questions. "I don't live here in Newport. I'm a friend of Seth Cohen."

"The scrawny guy with the curly hair?" the woman asked, again replacing some hair behind her ear.

"Yeah. Seth Cohen," Summer simply said.

"Kirsten's son? Yes, I know who that is. I'd never think though that he would…" she stopped and gave Summer a meaning wink.

"He wouldn't what?" Summer asked, suddenly feeling the need to defend Seth.

The woman cleared her throat. "I've just never seen him together with a girl before. He's always been a little…odd."

"Well, he is with me. And you wouldn't be able to find a better person here tonight," Summer said firmly. She wouldn't let some newpsie say things about Seth.

"If you think so,"

"I do." Summer looked at the woman who stood beside her with a glass in her hand again fixing her hair. For the first time she could remember she felt like she was so much better. Who was this person anyway? Summer had listened to her talking about some Dianne having had her boobs done and how she'd described in detail how her gardener couldn't do his job.

Weren't there more important things in life?

"Will you excuse me?" Summer said and hurried away from the woman who looked quite surprised. It didn't matter though. It didn't matter what that woman thought about her.

As Summer reached an empty table in the backyard she sat down on a chair, looking out over the ocean. Smiling to herself.

vvvvvvvvvv

"Hey," a voice said and as she turned around she saw Seth.

"Hey," she softly said back.

He sat down next to her. "Have you been here for long? I've been looking for you inside,"

Summer nodded and noticed that the two of them were sitting further away from the others than she'd really thought. "I've been here for a while. It's so beautiful out here."

"Yeah, it is," Seth agreed with her, fallowing her gaze out to the ocean. He couldn't help but studying her though; she was so beautiful. "You…are you okay?"

Summer smiled and nodded, turning her head away from the ocean and focusing on him. "What about you?"

Seth looked surprised but he smiled. "Me? I'm great."

"Good. But if you wouldn't feel okay you know that you can talk to me, right?" Summer asked, slightly afraid that he wouldn't be honest with her.

"Of course."

"Even though I'm the one who needs the most support I don't want you to feel like you can't talk to me. I want to be a good friend."

"You are."

The sincerity in his voice made it impossible not to believe him. Summer smiled and looked straight into his eyes. "So are you. The best."

He held her gaze and felt like he could drown in those deep brown eyes. Then, without really thinking he leaned closer to her.

She felt his breath on her face as he kept looking at her. A little uncertain, she closed her eyes and touched his lips with her own. It was a light peck and only lasted for a second but to Summer it was perfect.

Neither opened their eyes though and a soft kiss fallowed. Everything was so slow that the tiniest move could ruin everything. Summer leaned her forehead onto Seth's, still with her eyes closed.

Seth captured her lips again, this time in a real kiss lasting longer. His hand cupped her chin and she placed her own over his. As his soft lips touched hers Summer felt like she could faint. He was so gentle and his lips against hers felt so good.

After the kiss ended Summer slowly pulled away, taking Seth's hand that had been on her chin into her own, placing them in her lap. She looked at them, his bigger one and hers so small. She intertwined their fingers and finally looked up to meet Seth.

He reached up his hand and lightly caressed her cheek, so careful that it sent shivers down her spine. He was so adorable that Summer couldn't help but kiss him again, this time more passionate.

Her hands found their place on his neck while his were in her hair, pulling her face closer to him as the kiss was urgent and needy.

It was the first time someone cared enough to not rip her clothes off after just a few kisses. No one had ever just wanted to kiss her and no one had definitely been this gentle with her before. It was almost as if he was afraid that she would run away and disappear and it was as if he was waiting for her permission before he did anything.

But once he got, he was still amazing. Everything was amazing…and perfect.

"Mmm," Summer said as they pulled apart, for the first time since they'd started kissing really watching each other. She didn't even realise that she was enjoying this _this_ much but as Seth smiled and kissed her cheek Summer couldn't help but let a small giggle out.

"What?" Seth asked keeping a hold of her hand, fumbling with her fingers.

Summer smiled while shaking her head. "Nothing."

"Nothing?"

Another giggle escaped from her throat. "We just kissed," she said as if that would be something unusual.

"I know," Seth smirked.

"Isn't that weird? I mean we just kissed and now we're sitting here…God, this is so weird," Summer blushed.

"How is this weird?" Seth laughed.

"It just is."

Summer was about to continue but was stopped by Seth kissing her again. This time a lot more intense.

"Is it still weird?" he asked as they pulled apart, catching their breaths.

After breathing for a few seconds Summer once again crushed her lips against his, figuring that nothing could be a better response.

_Finally they kissed as so many of you have wished. First I wasn't going to have them kiss in this chapter but then it just sort of happened. I hope you are happy with that. _

_I would love to hear some ideas of where you think I should take this now. Should they start dating? Or was it a mistake to kiss?_

_Please leave a review!_


	10. Chapter 10

_Huge thanks you! I love you! I love you!_

Summer wrapped her shirt tighter around her, feeling the light breeze make its way through her cloth; she should have taken a jacket with her. Maybe a band for her hair as well because it was blowing in all directions, probably making her look like a troll.

"Summer!" She looked around and saw Marissa Cooper hurrying towards her with purse and bags in her hands. "Sorry I'm late. Have you been here for long?" the blonde quickly asked as she wrapped one of her slim arms around Summer's neck.

"It's okay. You look all stressed. Where have you been?" Summer said as they pulled apart, Marissa a little flushed as she'd apparently had to hurry there.

"Mom and I went shopping. I'd sort of promised her that for ages. I lost track of time, sorry."

"It's alright, Coop. What did you get?" The girls began to slowly walk towards the beauty salon.

"A couple of new tops and a skirt I just have to show you later. But we didn't get very much since mom insisted on going into every store she could see where there were rings."

Summer frowned and turned her head to look at her friend, in such an abrupt motion that all her hair flew to one side of her shoulders. "Rings?"

"She wants Ryan to propose. She's always saying how we've been steady for so long but I think it was too long ago she was at a wedding. Maybe I should get married just so she'll get happy." Marissa explained with a shrug.

"Wow. I didn't know that you were thinking of marriage. Do you think that Ryan is the one you'd marry?"

"Yeah. But I'm not sure that I'm ready yet though," Marissa opened the door to the salon and held it up to Summer. "It's a pretty big step, don't you think?"

Summer nodded. "Yes. And, I mean if you marry someone you should be sure that you do the right thing. Not just jump into something because everyone else tells you that it's the right time."

Marissa smiled, stunned by how good Summer seemed to understand. "I know. My mom's just being Julie Cooper. And she doesn't even like Ryan that much."

A few minutes later, both lying and getting massages, Marissa carefully asked what she'd been thinking of for the last twenty minutes.

"Summer, how is Seth?"

Summer turned her head to look at Marissa, slightly confused by her question. "He's good. But you saw him yesterday so you should know."

"I know but I meant how things are with girls," she carefully explained, a little embarrassed.

"Oh, he's…um, I don't really know."

"Because it seems that you two are very close and I figured you'd know." Marissa paused, thinking hard. "Look, I know that this must sound very weird but I'm just worried about him. I want him to find a nice woman because he really deserves one."

Summer nodded and agreed. "I know. He really does."

"But you don't know anything? Because you said that you two were just friends, right?"

"I did," Summer said and Marissa wasn't sure if it was a question or not.

"Are you sure that you're just friends? And don't take this the wrong way Summer, but you seem a little too close. I mean, it looks like you really like each other."

"We do," Summer quickly said, finding it true. "But we're not together or anything. It's not like that."

Marissa nodded but continued. "Okay. But you'd tell me if you knew anything, right? I can keep it to myself if you'd want that."

Summer was about to say yes but then she realised that that would be a lie. She didn't really know what they were; definitely more than friends but not girlfriend/boyfriend.

She knew that she liked Seth and kissing him had been amazing. But she wasn't sure that she was ready for something serious; she had never had a relationship before and just the thought of it scared her. She knew that she'd just screw him up. It wasn't fair to enter something with Seth while she still had so many personal issues.

Summer wanted him to find someone good for him; someone not messed up. He did deserve someone great and amazing.

And she wasn't that person.

"Summer?" Marissa drew her back to reality.

"We kissed last night." Summer blurted out, not entirely sure that she should tell this. But she was in desperate need for some advice.

Marissa smiled and immediately got very curious. "You did? That's great. Right?"

Sighing, Summer shrugged. "I don't know. I'm confused."

"Of course you are. But what kind of kiss was it? Just a quick kiss and then you went home?"

The brunette thought for a moment before answering before deciding to go with the truth. Even if it all felt so surreal it had happened. "We kissed…a lot. And then he took me home."

"Did you talk or anything?"

"No, we just…we just kissed." Summer said and closed her eyes, thinking that she was so stupid. She was leading him on; she was hurting him.

He'd been so happy; smiled and showed her those adorable dimples. And he'd held her hand and been so gentle.

She felt how the first tears escaped from her eyes, making their way down her face. This always happened; she always ended up hurting people. And especially the ones she really cared about.

"Summer?" Marissa said, having noticed that her friend was crying. "Could you leave us alone for a while?" she asked the two masseurs who left, then hurried to Summer.

"Hey, it's okay." Marissa gave Summer a robe and sat down next to her, placing a hand on her shoulder.

The brunette turned away, embarrassed as she couldn't stop the tears. "I'm sorry," she whispered and sniffled.

"Don't be. Tell me what's wrong. Is it Seth?"

Summer nodded feeling quite pathetic. "I shouldn't have kissed him, Marissa."

"You don't like him that way?" Marissa asked in a serious voice, as if she thought that was the case.

Summer shook her head though. "I do. But I can't be with him."

"Why?"

"I just can't. I'll only hurt him. Like I am now."

"You won't hurt him and you're not now." Marissa tried in a consoling voice, keeping her hand on Summer's shoulder.

"Yes, I am." Summer stubbornly said while still having tears rolling down her cheeks. "He deserves so much better than me."

"Don't say things like that, Summer. Seth deserves to be happy and he likes you so why not be with you?"

vvvvvvvvv

Placing the newly bought comforter on the bed, Seth walked a little further away and studied what he'd created; a functional guestroom. Finally he had thrown out all his things and really made this room what it was supposed to be from the start; a place for his guests if he had any.

He'd only lived in the apartment for a little more over a year but never before bothered to care about that room. Why have a guestroom when he never needed one?

Now though, he could use a room like that. Summer was the first person who'd ever stayed over; he'd never invited anyone lese to spend the night. Not even women he'd met. If they were to spend the night together he would be at their place. He liked his own space; his freedom.

But now he'd definitely thought it was time to do something about that room, and he had. He'd surprise Summer later with it. He hoped that she would like what he'd done.

All day Seth had thought about calling her but he knew that she would spend the day together with Marissa and he didn't want to disturb them. He knew how glad Summer was to have a friend; another female. He might be a good friend but he was just no good in shopping or whatever stuff women liked to do. And he was so happy for Summer for having found a friend, besides Marissa was pretty okay.

Therefore he had been keeping himself busy all day with this project and finally, it was finished.

Now he was ready to call her.

"Hello?" Summer's voice was heard and instantly made Seth smile.

"Summer, hi. It's me, um, Seth."

She grinned into the phone, happy to hear him even though she had freaked out all day about him. "I recognise your voice, Seth."

"Good." Seth said and swallowed. How come she had the power to make him completely forget what he had planned to say?

"I'm glad you called." Maybe she could sense his nervousness because Seth immediately felt better. He'd been quite scared that she would act weird after last night.

"I've been wanting to all day. But I knew you were with Marissa so I waited patiently."

"Aren't you just perfect?" she smiled. "I was going to call you, too."

"Yeah? I was kind of scared that you wouldn't."

"Why?"

"Well, because of yesterday. I don't know. Maybe I was a little too forward."

"Seth, if you're talking about the kiss or should I say kisses, I did enjoy it. Didn't you know that?" She thought that his nervousness and carefulness was so cute. It made her want to kiss him again and again.

"Since you started making out with me like there was no tomorrow, I kind of think that you did." Seth said, smirking.

"Oh, you." She playfully started. "I did not enjoy it that much. And you kissed me first!"

"No, you kissed me."

"Okay, so what if I did? Are you trying to tell me that you didn't like it?"

"No! I did like it. A lot. So much that I wanted to invite you over as a matter of fact."

"Oh, you do?"

"Yes, Summer. I am now inviting you over._ And_, I plan on cooking for you."

"I can't say no to you cooking, can I?"

"You can't."

"I'll be there in an hour." She said and hung up, not giving him a chance to offer her a ride.

With a huge smile on her face, impossible to wipe off, she hurried to her wardrobe hoping to find something good to put on.

She had no idea why Seth made her feel like this, so good about herself. Just a few hours ago she had doubted that this was a good thing to enter but at the moment she didn't even care. She only cared that she really wanted to see Seth again, soon.

vvvvvvvvv

Seth opened the door, only to reveal this cute brunette he loved spending time with. She was if possible even cuter than she normally was, wearing a grey jacket and a white shirt under, jeans and a pair of black boots.

"Hi," she said, remaining outside his apartment, grinning while looking at him.

He cleared his throat and smiled as well. "Hi,"

"Can I come in?"

"Sure!" he said kind of embarrassed for not saying anything. He closed the door after her and took her jacket. "I've just finished making dinner."

Summer watched as he scratched his chin; he looked so cute dressed in a striped shirt and a pair of black pants, looking his very best.

She smiled and grabbed his arm, fighting the urge to kiss him already. "How was your day?"

"Good. I actually fixed some things around here."

"Oh, you did some cleaning?"

"I'll show you," he said and started leading her to the guestroom, probably grinning like an idiot.

"The surfboard room?" Summer asked, looking at him.

Seth didn't reply, just opened the door and let her see for herself. She smiled and walked inside, sitting down on the bed. "You did all this by yourself?"

Seth nodded proudly. "I did. You like it?"

"Yeah. It's very nice."

She looked up at him and smiled, meeting his gaze. "Aren't you gonna say anything?" she asked after some time of silence.

Looking serious, or trying to, Seth spoke. "Hey, I didn't wanna ruin the moment."

"We're having a moment?" Summer laughed.

"Yeah. Duh," he said and cupped her face, finally doing what they've both longed for all day; he kissed her.

_I had a hard time deciding what to do but you all helped me in your reviews; thanks. As I had received over thirty reviews I decided to start writing, no matter how bad the words would come out. Because, guys, I sort of had to give you another chapter after those amazing reviews!_

_Thank you! Really, thank you._

_To the chapter; what did you think? Was it what you were hoping for? Or not? I promise that their confusion will be developed. But as last time, I love if you have any suggestions. _

_Please review! You know now that it's rewarded. _


	11. Chapter 11

_Lights will guide you home _

_And ignite your bones _

_And I will try to fix you _

_- Coldplay _

Summer was lying in her bed with the bedcovers tightly wrapped around her, soundly asleep. It was a Friday morning and she was free from work for once and able to sleep for as long as she wanted. The alarm that stood on her floor showed 08:30. But that wasn't something that Summer was aware of since she was sleeping and planned to continue doing that the whole day.

Work could be such a pain in the ass. Late evenings, annoying costumers and little money. But what was she supposed to do? She had to work just like everybody else and it wasn't anybody else's fault that Summer was a waitress. She had chosen it herself.

But that was nothing to think about or worry about today. Today she would sleep, finally.

Too bad though that she had to wake up because of the phone, that suddenly started to ring. She had it next to the alarm on the floor and tiredly threw down her arm to search for it while remaining slumbering on her pillow. She hated to be awake this early but since she had a guess of who it might be, she had to answer. And a call this early could be important.

"Hello," she sleepily said into the phone, rolling onto her side.

Seth's joyful voice was heard on the other line. "Good morning, Summer!"

"Cohen…it's early," she slurred, keeping her eyes shut and her body under the warm covers.

"I know and sorry to wake you up. I promise to keep this short and let you get back to sleep soon."

"Let's hear it then," Summer yawned.

She could hear how he took a deep breath, almost as if he was preparing for something very important. She therefore tried to be patient even if she would rather talk to him later. "Okay, so I am actually going away to San Francisco later today. It's a job thing but I doubt that I'll be very busy so I was kind of wondering if-you-wanted-to-come."

"Huh? You lost me in the end." Summer wasn't sure that she'd heard him correct and didn't want to assume anything.

"I was wondering if you wanted to come," Seth said, this time a lot slower and clearer. "But you don't have to. It's just a suggestion."

Summer thought about it for a moment. What did this mean? Maybe he thought that she was ready to share a bed with him and maybe he saw her as a girlfriend. No. He had agreed on taking things slow with her; he knew that she had to go slow. And he was nervous, a fact that made her want to go so badly. Seth wouldn't hurt her; never. "Okay. Well, when would we leave?" she finally said.

Seth smiled, hoping this meant that she would come. "You and I would go around four and then come back Saturday night or Sunday morning. If you'll come that will say."

"I'll come if you take me to dinner." Summer said, trying not to giggle into the phone. How was it possible that he always made her forget about her insecurities and just want to be with him? He'd bring sunshine to her day.

"Dinner as in a date?" Seth hopefully asked.

Summer nodded and kept thinking of how cute he was.

"Summer?"

Summer laughed. "Oh, I nodded but I guess you didn't see that."

"I didn't." Seth said in a duh-tone.

"I say yes; a date. If you want to." She suddenly became a little embarrassed for being so forward. Maybe he liked her better as an insecure person who didn't say very much. She had come to grew comfortable around him and feel like she could speak her mind. Therefore Seth's answer made her relax, calm down.

"Of course I want to! I'm already thinking of where to take you and what to wear."

Summer smiled. "Good."

He cleared his throat. "So, I'll call you a little later."

"Sure."

"Go back to sleep. Sorry that I woke you up."

"Night," Summer mumbled and laid back down in the nest of sheets.

vvvvvvvvv

"Seth!" a blonde woman came rushing toward him where he stood by the newsstand. It was his mother.

"Mom, hi!" he said while giving her a hug. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, I was just doing some shopping when I thought I saw you. I was actually hoping to get to talk to you."

"Yeah?"

Kirsten nodded. "You know that your father's birthday is coming up and I was wondering if you wanted to come over this weekend to talk some about it."

"Dad's birthday. Right."

She gave him a dangerous look. "Don't tell me you'd forgotten about it,"

"No, of course not. He's my father." Seth smiled.

"Good. So will you come?"

"I can't. I'm going to San Francisco."

"Work?"

"Yeah."

"Then it won't take all weekend, right?"

"No, but I've invited someone with me and I think we're gonna stay."

"Someone? As in Summer?"

"Well, yeah."

"Then I understand. We can talk about Sandy's birthday another time."

"You sure?"

"Of course. You go have a great time with Summer."

"I will."

"So, Seth. Are you like a couple now?"

"No. We're just spending time together."

"I'm glad that you've found a nice woman like Summer. I'd like to meet her again. Maybe you should bring her over sometime again."

"I'll ask her."

vvvvvvvvv

Summer glanced over to Seth, who was sitting beside her. His eyes were focused on the road but she thought seeing him look at her from time to time. And the whole time he had a small smile plastered on his lips. Summer herself couldn't stop with the smiling either, she didn't want to.

Since she'd met Seth her weekends had been pretty fun and she'd look forward to them all the time. And that was great. This though, was more than great. They were taking a trip. At least it was a trip in her eyes; she always stayed around L.A. And she certainly didn't stay in any hotels. Now though, she would.

Had he got a room with two beds by the way? Or did he expect her to share one with him? Maybe that wouldn't be too bad but Summer had never before spent the night with someone, not even in the same room. But the good news was that he didn't snore and he looked so cute while sleeping.

"What are you thinking about?" Seth asked.

"Um, just about this weekend. It's gonna be fun."

vvvvvvvvv

"Hey, you're back," Summer quietly said from where she sat on the balcony in a chair, a blanket wrapped around her. She'd spent the hour Seth had to work outside, looking out over the town doing some thinking. It had been good but she was happy that he was back.

Seth sat down in the chair next to hers. "Yeah. Have you been okay?"

Summer nodded. "It's nice out here,"

"Listen, I'm sorry that I had to go work like, immediately. Now I'm free though." Seth apologized, feeling a little bad even if he'd only left her by herself for a little over an hour and a half.

"Don't worry about it. I like being alone sometimes; and besides, I'm used to it." Seth only nodded, unsure of what to respond to that. He decided to go with the silence. "You know, this is my first visit to another town for a long time. I've only been in New York where I used to live." She paused but as Seth encouraged her with his facial expression, she continued. "My parents never brought me to places, not even when they were together."

"Was it hard? Not having your dad with you I mean." Seth carefully asked.

"Yeah. I used to miss him a lot. And I always blamed my mom for him leaving. But I'm also pissed that he just left me with mom; she never cared about me. I always went alone to school, made myself dinner and tried the best I could with my homework. She only signed the necessary things," Summer finished with a shrug, not wanting him to feel weird about this. It was a long time ago.

"I'm sorry,"

"Please, don't be. It's not your fault and it's in the past." Summer sadly said, taking his hand in hers. "And, besides I don't want to ruin our evening."

"You can't possibly do that." Seth quickly said.

She shrugged his comment off and forced a smile. "How was work?"

"Summer,"

"Seth, I don't want to talk about it now." She gently explained. "Let's do something."

He seemed to understand that he wouldn't get anything more out of her so he finally gave up. "Alright, what do you have in mind?"

She frowned and let go of his hand. "You forgot?"

"Forgot what?"

"Nothing," Summer quickly said and looked down, terribly disappointed. He'd forgotten about their date, their first real date. She'd really looked forward to it.

Suddenly Seth started laughing. "Oh, come on. Did you honestly believe that I would forget a date? _With you_." He smiled and Summer was about to punch him when his lips captured hers in a sweet kiss. She immediately relaxed and forgot about everything else.

"But I thought we could hang out here tonight, maybe watch a movie or something. The date is tomorrow night." Seth smirked as they pulled apart.

"Thank you," Summer whispered, not caring about the huge grin on his face. As he noticed her seriousness Seth pulled her into his lap, caressing her face. He drew lines from the tip of her little nose up to where her gorgeous hair began, down the side of her face and stopping by her chin. Summer had her eyes closed, leaning into his touch.

Coming closer to her face, his lips just inches from hers, Seth whispered a 'thank you' before kissing her.

"Why are you thanking me?" Summer asked and lay her head down on his shoulder, her arms around his neck and fingers lightly stroking his soft curls.

"Because you gave me a chance and you treat me with respect. For making me happy I guess." Summer frowned and moved her head up to look at him. She didn't understand what he was talking about. "Don't look so surprised, Summer."

"What are you talking about, Seth? You're scaring me,"

Seth gently pushed her head back onto his shoulder and began to unconsciously play with her hair. "My history with girls is not the best," he confessed and she frowned again. "No one's ever wanted to be with me before."

"I can't understand that. You're the sweetest man I've ever met." Summer told him sincerely. What girls had he met before?

Seth grabbed her hand again and squeezed it, glad to be able to have someone to hold hands with. "And you're the sweetest woman I've ever met, Summer."

She smiled but quickly turned serious again. With an almost inaudible voice she carefully asked him, "Did something happen?"

He knew what she meant and unfortunately he knew the answer to it far too well. "It was a few years ago. I was dating this girl who I really liked. She cheated on me. And so did my next girlfriend."

Filling with anger toward those people Summer tightened her arms around him. "Seth, I'm sorry."

"They weren't good for me anyway; they didn't care about me. Only about what family I came from." He fumbled with her fingers, observing how little her hand was in his.

Summer smiled sympathetically and pulled him into a hug, sensing that this was hard for him. And she knew how difficult it could be with people letting you down. "I'd never cheat on you, Seth."

"I know," he whispered into her hair.

"And I really care about you. I'm glad that you trust me and told me this. Because I trust you more than I've ever trusted anyone before."

He nodded, happy that she could be honest with her. "I'm over it though. It hurt but I've moved on."

Still in a tight embrace she softly spoke, "I hope I won't hurt you."

"You won't. Just don't disappear from my life." Summer nodded against his neck and closed her eyes. "You tired?" she nodded again and tightened her grip around his neck just a little bit, telling him that she wanted to stay in his arms. "I'll take you to bed."

"Where are you gonna sleep?" Summer anxiously asked.

"On the other bed, don't worry." he lifted her up in his arms and carried her inside, placing her lightly on one of the beds. "Maybe you'd like to change. I'll go outside for a little while."

Summer didn't get the chance to respond since he simply walked out to the balcony again, leaving her sitting on the bed. She was really tired, from doing absolutely nothing, so she quickly put her pyjamas on, brushed her teeth and crawled under the covers.

A few moments later Seth walked back in, closing the French doors behind him. He smiled as he saw that Summer was already asleep, taking up as little space on the bed a person possible could it seemed. "Goodnight, Summer."

_I know this took longer than usual but school's just been too much. Thanks for the wonderful reviews! Honestly, you're amazing._

_Tell me your thoughts of next chapter. The date?_

_Please leave a review!_


	12. Chapter 12

_You with the sad eyes _

_Don't be discouraged _

_Oh I realize _

_It's hard to take courage _

_In a world full of people _

_You can lose sight of it all _

_And the darkness inside you _

_Can make you feel so small _

_But I see your true colours _

_Shining through _

_I see your true colours _

_-True Colours, Phil Collins _

Summer opened her eyes, having slept absolutely amazing. She sensed that this would be a very good day and as she saw the flowers on the bedside table she smiled widely. She looked over at Seth's bed and figured that he already had gone to work; it was abandoned except from Seth's orange socks.

Sitting up she grabbed the flowers, which were pink gerbera. She counted them, as many as months they'd known each other.

It was just then Summer noticed the note lying underneath the flowers; folded two times.

_Summer, _

_You've probably already figured about that I'm at work. I'll be back around three thirty. You just enjoy the day, hang out here or go explore the town. I've spoken to a guy named Richard down at the reception and if you're bored or just very curious, ask him and he'll give you some great tips. _

_Just make sure to be back before five; I don't want us to be late for tonight. Miss you already. _

_Seth _

A grin crept onto her face, and she hopped out of bed in search for a vase or something for the flowers; she didn't want to throw them away. She found a big glass and filled it with water, then put the pink flowers into it and placed them back on her bedside table.

Summer decided to try and go out and see the town, maybe ask _Richard _for some tips. She had a great outfit she'd bought together with Marissa and for tonight she'd wear a nice dress Marissa had given to her.

First Summer had been really embarrassed and didn't want to accept it but as Marissa told her that the dress was too small for her and that she'd bought it because it would look great on Summer, how could she say no? She'd find a way to make it up to her friend.

Taking a long shower and putting some makeup on Summer pulled her hair into a pony tail, leaving her ears as they were; without any jewellery. She chose a dark blue shaded pair of jeans, then slipped a beige top with brown details on. Finally putting on a light jacket and a pair of shoes she was ready for the day.

vvvvvvvvv

Seth sighed while shaking his head which rested in his hands; this was just not the way it was supposed to be. How could so much go wrong? The restaurant had had a major disaster, something about an explosion in the kitchen, so they wouldn't be able to have dinner where he'd planned. And for the last forty minutes he'd tried to come up with something else; a new restaurant. But to Seth's disappointment everything seemed to be full already. Saturday night was a very popular night to eat out; especially on all the nice places.

He'd really wanted to do something special for Summer; something to show how much he cared about her. But, no…the universe – or at least San Francisco - had to be against him.

"Mr. Cohen, are you ready for the presentation?" He slowly looked up and saw one of his colleagues in the doorway, looking slightly irritated.

"Um, sure. I'll be right there."

vvvvvvvvv

The day turned into evening, finally. Both Summer and Seth had had an unusually long day and even if Summer had spent her day in the beautiful city and Seth had tried his hardest to come up with a plan for their date while working, for it to turn into night had never been more important it seemed.

Seth had quickly come into the hotel room at four, giving Summer a long kiss, telling her that she should get ready. Then he rushed out again, to fix all the last details.

And now Summer patiently sat waiting on the bed, dressed up and ready to go. She wondered what was taking Seth so long; it couldn't be that complicated to get reservations in a restaurant. That was all he had to do. She fumbled with the hem of her dress while wiggling her toes inside her new heels.

As she was about to go get something to drink the door flung open and in rushed a much stressed Seth Cohen; dressed in a suit. His tie was a little messy and so was his hair; which of course made him look even cuter in Summer's eyes.

"Finally!" Summer exclaimed and stood up, fixing her dress as she did so. "I was starting to worry." She smiled brightly though, reassuring him that she wasn't mad.

He walked up to her, taking her hand in his. "Sorry that I kept you waiting," he whispered and placed a soft kiss on her cheek. "You're beautiful by the way."

"And you look great," Summer said while trying to hide the blush. She couldn't believe that this was all happening; that the sweetest guy she'd ever met was taking her on a date. But somehow it was and all she could do was enjoy it before it ended.

"Shall we?" Seth gestured for the door.

Outside a limousine was waiting; at least Seth had managed not to screw that up. Summer kept a hold of his arm the entire way to the restaurant, grinning like she was on top of the world; maybe she was. Because everything seemed to be perfect; nothing had ever felt this good.

As the car stopped Seth walked out and held out a hand for Summer to take. He led her inside of the building, walking her toward the butler as the limo drove off.

"Good evening," he said and smiled in that way all people do when they're trying to look nice. "Do you have reservations?"

"Yes, we do. Seth Cohen."

The butler looked through his list. "Sorry, I can't find you. Did you call for reservations?"

"Yes, I did." Seth cleared hi throat, obviously embarrassed. He didn't dare look at Summer, knowing that this wasn't fair to her. He'd spent the whole day calling and when he'd finally found a place everything had to go wrong again.

"I'm very sorry, sir. But it's all full tonight," the butler apologized and forced a smile.

"Are you sure? Because I have reserved a table for two,"

"Yes. Do you remember who you spoke to?"

Seth frowned, scratching his chin. "Unfortunately not."

"Then I'm afraid that there's nothing I can do. I wish we had a table for you." He then gave his full attention to a newly arrived couple.

Summer tugged on Seth's arm, trying to lock eyes with him. "It's okay, Seth. We'll find somewhere else to eat."

"Summer," he started looking so confused. What was he going to do now? He wasn't very spontaneous.

"Let's go," she said and dragged him out from the restaurant, her arm linked through his.

"I'm sorry for this, Summer. I did call. But they must have double booked or something."

"Don't worry about it. I'm sure we'll find someplace else." Summer genuinely said, trying her best to cheer him up. She could see that this really bothered him.

"I called a lot of places and it was all full for tonight,"

"Everything can't be. Come on,"

"I'll call the driver," Seth started.

Summer quickly kissed his hand. "Don't. Let's walk."

vvvvvvvvv

After having walked together for about twenty minutes Summer pointed at a small restaurant where they ended up eating. It wasn't fancy at all; quite the opposite.

"Listen, Sum. I'm really sorry about tonight. I wanted it to be perfect."

Summer reached over the table to grab his hand. "It _is_ perfect." And she really believed that it was. She wasn't disappointed at all. Because the important thing was to be with Seth; not if they ate in an expensive restaurant or not.

"Okay, as long as you're happy."

"I am. And I'm used to things like this. You don't have to take me to nice places all the time; you're gonna lose a fortune spending so much on me."

Seth nodded, not feeling the need to answer that. After all she knew that he decided whether or not to spend money. And she knew that his job paid for the hotel. So, what if he wanted to give her things?

"I actually had something planned after dinner that can't possibly be ruined too. I mean, that would just be too much."

"It was just a double booking."

"It wasn't. That restaurant wasn't the place I wanted to take you in the first place. I'd planned on taking you to a place my dad's recommended but there was some explosion in the kitchen so…here we are."

Summer laughed. "Yep. Here we are."

vvvvvvvvv

"So, you liked it?" Seth asked a little careful as they stepped into their hotel room later that night. It was late as they'd spent several hours after dinner in a beautiful place; near the ocean in a park.

Summer turned around. "You're kidding, right? That was the best night of my life. I didn't even notice the other people around." She put her purse down on the table and went up to him, crushing her lips against his in a soundly kiss. "I'm gonna go take a shower,"

"Kay," Seth smiled figuring that he must look really silly. But, man, she really was something.

Forty minutes later, Summer appeared from the bathroom. Apparently Seth had given up waiting because he was lying in his bed, sleeping. Carefully, not wanting to wake him up or anything, Summer sat down next to his sleeping body. She watched his chest rise and fall and listened to his soft breathing.

Would he mind if she lay down for just a little while? She'd not wake him up or fall asleep; just lay there for a while. She lifted the covers and slipped under, not really thinking. This wasn't something she'd normally do but somehow it just felt right; and as she crept closer to him, feeling the warmth from his body she knew that it couldn't be wrong.

His eyes were closed but she felt his arm go around her waist, hugging her against his body and pulling her so close that the only space for her head to rest on was his shoulder. Maybe he was awake? Then she would have to go back to her own bed.

Looking over at it, she snuggled closer to Seth. It looked so cold and lonely over in her bed; Seth's was much cosier.

"Summer?" Seth mumbled into her hair, stroking his fingers over her bare arm. She immediately tensed; would he tell her to go back to her bed?

With a small voice she asked, "Can I stay here tonight?"

"Of course you can."

_I'd like to thank all of you who review. Like, Jules; thank you both!_

_This chapter was harder to write than I'd imagined. Let me know what you think, will ya?_

_Please leave a comment..._


	13. Chapter 13

_Thanks for the amazing reviews! Sorry this took some time. _

_I'd planned on waiting to post this, writing ahead some, but then I was like 'who am I to not post an already finished chapter to you guys?' __So, here it is!_

"So, you slept together." Marissa said with a smile, summing up what Summer just had told her.

"I guess," the brunette answered with a blush. Marissa nodded curiously and smiled even wider. "Oh, no! Not slept together like that." Summer quickly explained as she realised what Marissa was thinking, feeling her cheeks getting warm. God, this was embarrassing. "I mean, we just shared bed. That's all,"

"Okay. I believe you,"

"Good." The whole thought of it, that Marissa thought they had done _that, _was kind of strange. They'd just met. Maybe not just met but at least they hadn't been dating for long. Were they even dating now? Summer had no idea how these things worked; how did you know?

Could she ask Marissa about it? No! That was to embarrass herself even more, which wasn't necessary at all. No. She wouldn't talk to Marissa about it.

"Is there anything you want to talk about?" Marissa asked as if she'd read Summer's mind. She placed the magazine she'd been holding onto the coffee table and gave Summer her full attention.

"No! Well, kind of," she coyly said and began to play with a ring on her finger.

"What then?"

Summer shook her head. "No, it's nothing."

"Come on. You can tell me,"

"It's embarrassing!"

Marissa placed her hand on Summer's knee, forcing her friend to look at her. "I won't laugh, or whatever you're afraid of."

Summer took a deep breath. "Well, you know…um," she looked at the blonde nervously but only received an encouraging smile. "Seth's…Seth's my first, you know,"

"Boyfriend?"

Summer frowned. "Is that what he is? My boyfriend?"

"I don't know. From what you've told me it sure seems like it."

"God, this is pathetic. I don't even know what he is." She placed her head into her hand.

"Summer, consider him your boyfriend and if you're not sure, ask him,"

"Is that what you do? Ask? Did you do that with Ryan?"

"Um, no. It just happened naturally I guess. I just knew,"

"Oh," Summer felt so stupid, like a little girl curious about her elder sister's exciting experiences.

"Seth's your first boyfriend? Or first guy?"

"I've been with guys before. But nothing serious," Summer quickly explained, feeling like that was an area she wanted to keep to herself.

"Okay."

"Yeah,"

"Your date was good and you spent a night in the same bed."

"I guess so,"

vvvvvvvvv

Knocking on the door Summer straightened her skirt and placed her hair behind her ears.

"Summer! You don't have to knock," Seth said and pulled her into a hug, making sure to have all of her into his embrace. "I've missed you."

Summer grinned and immediately felt like this was a ten times better day than it had been just minutes ago. "I've missed you, too."

"You brought the ice cream?"

"Yes, I did." Summer laughed at his awkward move and held up the bag with ice cream. "But I think it's about to melt,"

"Then we better start eatin', my little Summer." Grabbing her hand and the bag he walked into the living room and gently pushed her down to sit on the sofa. "I'll go get spoons." Summer smiled and turned the TV on, flicking through the channels. "By the way, Ryan called just before you came. He invited us for dinner!" Seth yelled from the kitchen and seconds later sat down next to her, passing her a spoon and placing the ice cream between their bodies.

vvvvvvvvv

With flowers in one hand and the cake in his other Seth walked in a rather slow pace over the square. The wind was light and the sun stood high in the sky, which made a perfect combination since the temperature was adequate. Next to him Summer walked in a yellow dress, her thick, brown hair hanging over her shoulders. "You sure that I can't help you with that?" she asked for the third time, feeling slightly useless as she walked carrying nothing as Seth had his arms full.

"No, I've got it," he smirked.

Ryan and Marissa had asked them to buy a cake; which was the reason of why they were walking from the bakery.

"Alright. Hey, Seth?" Summer looked up at him, pulling some hair behind her ear.

"Yeah,"

"You're really amazing,"

Seth smiled, squinting his eyes slightly and showing his adorable dimples. "I'd kiss you if I didn't have my arms full."

"Hey," she slapped his arm but couldn't help letting a giggle out. "I've offered to help you with those,"

"I'm a _gentleman_,"

"Right."

"I am. Don't I always carry your things and hold doors open for you?"

"Not really, no."

"Well, in my mind I am."

"So, you're a gentleman in your mind? I'm afraid that that doesn't even make any sense."

"Sure it does. It makes perfect sense,"

"Alright, you baby. At least I'm not carrying anything."

"See? I _am_ a gentleman."

Summer didn't even bother to say anything; she let him walk with a huge grin on his face carrying the cake and the flowers. As they'd continued to walk for maybe a minute or so she felt how Seth's arm wrapped itself around her shoulders, drawing her near.

"Hey, what did you do with-" Summer abruptly stopped walking, her feet stuck in the ground.

_This couldn't be._

"Summer?" Seth had stopped walking as well and still had his arm over her shoulders. "You coming?"

She quickly slid under his arm and placed herself behind his body, gripping his shirt with her hands. "Please, go." Her voice was so quiet, that he almost didn't hear her through all the noise around them.

"What's wrong?" he worriedly asked and made an attempt to turn around. She forced him to remain where he stood though, only causing his concern to grow. "Summer?"

"Seth, please just go."

Slightly afraid of her strange and sudden behaviour Seth did as he was told; he started to walk again with her gripping his shirt, almost as if she was glued onto his back.

As they neared the black Toyota Seth could feel how Summer loosened her grip and finally let go of him, walking up to the car with quick steps. She impatiently waited for him to unlock the car and as he became more worried seeing how she acted he tried to hurry, seeing how badly she wanted in the car. It was almost as if the car would be her sanctuary. From what, he did not know.

"Hey," Seth gently said after having placed the flowers and the cake in the backseat and sat down in his seat. "What happened?"

"Nothing. Please just drive." Summer sighed and met his gaze for a moment before quickly breaking their eye-contact. With a smile on her face she said, "We don't want to be late."

vvvvvvvvv

As Marissa opened the door Summer smiled the brightest smile of all, pushing Seth forward as he was the one holding the flowers. He awkwardly kissed the blonde's cheek and walked inside after having been told to give Ryan the cake and the flowers.

Summer gave her friend a long hug, thanking her for inviting them over.

"My pleasure, Summer. It's so great to see you again and this will be our first couple dinner together," Marissa excitedly beamed. Wrapping an arm around Summer she led her inside the apartment.

"Summer, hi!" Ryan said as they came into the living room and gave her a hug. Seth stood beside him and tried to meet Summer's eyes. "You hungry?"

"Ryan's cooked." Marissa told Seth and Summer proudly, staring up at her boyfriend lovingly. Did they have the perfect relationship, too? The four of them made their way into the dining room; which was quite simple and modern, the table set with green china.

Seth placed himself behind a chair and pulled it out, gesturing for Summer to sit. She smiled and sat down, letting him pull the chair in and sit down next to her.

"You're such a gentleman, Seth. Maybe you should teach Ryan some romance," Marissa said and nudged Ryan's shoulder.

"Don't listen to her, bro. She has no idea what she's talking about."

"Right," Seth said with a grin, enjoying seeing the two of them disagree about something. Even if he enjoyed their company and loved them, he belonged to one of those who thought that they were a little too perfect together, maybe even a little boring.

"This looks delicious, you guys." Summer smiled, interrupting the little scene that was taking place in front of her.

Seth grinned. "It really does, _Ryan_."

They all started to eat while the conversation went on, mostly including everybody except Summer. She remained silent throughout most of the meal, once and a while giving a nod or agreeing to something. Much to Seth's concern.

"It will just be a small party according to Kirsten so it's held at your house," Marissa explained later as they'd started with the cake Seth and summer had bought.

"Cool." Seth replied, still not very enthusiastic about his father's birthday party.

Marissa didn't seem to care though, about everyone's lack of interest. She turned to Seth, "Yeah and Kirsten told me to tell you Seth, that she wants Summer to come."

"Yeah? Summer, you heard that?" Seth asked, smiling and hoping for Summer to become a little more interested in the conversation. He carefully touched her knee, trying to get her attention. "Summer?"

"Huh?" she said and looked up from her plate. This time it wasn't just Seth whose eyes went to search her face, Ryan and Marissa also seemed to be curious of what was going on in Summer's mind tonight.

"Mom and dad want you to come for his birthday," Seth slowly explained.

Again, trying to act fine, she smiled. "Oh, great!"

"Yeah, great." Seth sighed, looking over the table at Ryan and Marissa who looked equally concerned.

vvvvvvvvv

The minute they stepped into the car Seth turned the engine on and steered his car out onto the road. He kept the speed down though and glanced over at Summer who sat in her seat quiet and with a frown on her face, as if she was thinking of something unpleasant. Seth knew that she didn't want to talk about it, whatever it was.

He wondered what had happened, what had changed her. She'd changed so sudden that something big must have happened. Could it be him? Had he said something and forgot about it? She was back to where she'd been a couple of months ago, where she wouldn't talk to him, where she wouldn't let him in.

"Summer?" he gently said and turned his gaze toward her. She actually let her eyes fall on him, still looking the blank same though. "Is everything okay?"

She nodded and forced a smile, the tiniest though. Just like those times she'd tried to please him before. "You know that you can tell me," he gently placed his hand on her arm and started to rub it softly. "Whatever it is."

"Yeah, I know."

Seth decided not to push her. "Okay. Do you want to come to my place for a while? I know there's some ice cream left."

She apologetically smiled again. "Another time, Seth. I'm tired."

"You could stay over,"

"I just want to go home. Please?"

"Yeah, okay."

And then the silence came back; both of them turning to look onto the road. It was traffic time and took forever to get to Summer's building it seemed, but finally Seth slowed down, stopping just outside of the door. Through the door window he spotted people, they were always there. He'd gotten used to them.

"Are you gonna be okay?"

"Yeah, of course. Thanks for the ride,"

"Sure." Seth said and waited for her to give him a hug or a kiss; a goodbye. Nothing came though; she just stepped out of the car and made a little wave before disappearing.

_Let me know your thoughts._ _Guesses, suggestions..._

_Please review!_


	14. Chapter 14

**It was only a few days ago I posted last chapter but you guys made me feel a little guilty and I loved the reviews; so here's a new chapter. I really tried to post this as soon as possible and since I have to study today I wanted to post it now, before it got too late. Therefore it might not be very well written. **

**I hope you'll like it though!**

_I'm so tired of being here  
Suppressed by all my childish fears  
And if you have to leave  
I wish that you would just leave  
'Cause your presence still lingers here  
And it won't leave me alone _

These wounds won't seem to heal  
This pain is just too real  
There's just too much that time cannot erase

_-My Immortal, Evanescence_

Summer stared blankly out of the window. She was sitting on the floor with her legs pulled up against her chest, still wearing her pyjamas. It was late afternoon but she hadn't moved from this spot much during the day, just a quick visit to the bathroom and she'd gone to the kitchen to get a bag of raisin.

Everything had been so perfect that she almost had started to believe that she could put this behind her. She should have known better.

Of all places she'd think he'd go to, it was here. Her mother had told her that he was in Europe; Summer had _believed _that he was there. Most times when she'd miss him or hate him she'd have that as a comfort, the fact that he was far away and she'd never see or hear from him ever again. Her mother had made her believe that he was a big ass and a coward, which he was, but she'd never tried to understand him or dream about meeting him. Because she'd known that he was on another continent.

The last couple of hours she'd tried to come up with explanations, explanations of how it was someone else she'd seen. She hadn't seen him for so many years that maybe she had forgotten about how he looked and she couldn't possibly know what he looked like now, after all these years. But deep down, she knew who the man she'd seen was. She knew that it was her father.

_He was walking out from the diner, bag in hand and a black jacket over his arm. His hair was still the curly same although not as dark as it once had been and he was possibly not in the same shape. She remembered him as muscular and even handsome. Now he looked much older, more mature and just like any normal American man looked like. _

_Summer carefully studied him from where she stood, pushed against Seth's back trying not to breath. This was the last thing she'd expected to happen, ever. _

_Just near them, he stopped and greeted a middle-aged woman and a teenaged couple. The woman looked nice, with a big smile on her face as she received a quick kiss from him. Maybe that was his wife? His **new** wife. And those two kids might be his kids, at least one of them since two siblings wouldn't be that intimate, their arms around each other sharing a kiss now and then._

_With an arm around the 'wife' he began to walk in Summer's direction where she still stood behind Seth, the teenagers just behind. _

"_Please go," she pleaded as she saw them coming closer. If Seth had said anything, she didn't know. She just needed to get out of here._

He had a new family; a whole new life. Of course Summer never had expected him to not have that, because he'd been so young when he'd left. Of course she'd always _known_ that he would find someone after her mother and probably have children together with her. He'd forget about his "old family".

Pulling her legs down to the floor Summer held up the small picture she'd had pushed up against her chest. It was the three of them, just before her third birthday. She was dressed in a pink summer dress and wore a happy smile, a common thing those days. Summer had been a joyful kid; always laughing, always smiling. And in this picture her parents looked pretty much the same, broad smiles on their faces.

An outsider would look at them and think that they were one of those happy families, one of those where there was lots of love. They'd see that this family still was in that state of family joy, the state most families had in the beginning where everything was great and maybe a second child could be on the way. Summer wouldn't blame that outsider, or try to prove them wrong. Because at that time, there had been joy and there had been happiness.

It had all changed though, quite unexpectedly in Summer's eyes. Though of course she'd only been five.

_The small brunette sat in her room, playing with her new doll Beatrice and dressed in one of her favourite dresses; the purple one she'd received as a gift from her grandmother. Summer loved everything she got from her grandmother since she was the only family she had besides her mommy and daddy but this dress was a favourite. It was beautiful; made of silky material just like a princess' dress. _

_Her mommy had allowed Summer to have some juice in her room so that she and Beatrice could have a tee party. Summer had promised not to spill anything and be very careful though to her disappointment she'd accidentally spilled some juice on Beatrice's white dress, just as she was about to let her have a sip. A yellow spot was now visible on the doll's chest and the little girl desperately tried to get it away; she had to have it removed. Otherwise her mother wouldn't let her have any tee parties any more. _

_As Summer pulled the doll into her lap, rubbing the white dress while her own dark curls hung in her face, a sudden shriek came from downstairs. Summer jumped, pulling Beatrice closer to her chest. Another sound was heard, the sound of glass breaking. "Mommy?" _

_Tipping on her toes down the hallway to the stairs, still holding her doll tight, Summer heard yelling and another glass breaking, as if it was thrown to the floor. She was scared and felt how the tears came to her eyes. _

"_Don't you dare come closer, Neil!" She heard her mother yell on the top of her lungs, so load that it made Summer start to run to the door. She'd heard a lot of that arguing lately but never been this scared. And they never threw any glasses. _

_As fast as her short legs could take her, Summer ran through the house and out onto the street; she knew the way to her grandmother's house. It was just a little bit down the street. _

"_Grandma," Summer cried and threw her arms around her dear grandmother Hattie as fast as she'd opened the door, Beatrice still in her arms. She buried her head in Hattie's apron which always smelled like newly baked cookies. _

_Shushing Summer, the old woman lifted her only granddaughter up into her arms, gently rocking her shaking body. "What's wrong, my little angel? Why are you crying?" _

_Rubbing her wet eyes and sniffling load, Summer looked up at Hattie. "I was scared. So we came here, Beatrice and I." _

_Hattie nodded and carried the child into her kitchen where she sat down on a chair, still holding Summer against her. Stroking some wet hair from the girl's face she started to sing. Hattie sat there holding her granddaughter and singing to her as Summer continued to cry and hold Beatrice close to her chest. _

That was one of the earliest memories Summer had and that was when everything started to shatter. Peace by peace the once so happy family was torn into so many peaces that it would be impossible to ever get them together again.

"I still remember the day you were done. No one's ever hurt me as much, no one ever could." Summer whispered to herself.

_"Mommy?" _

_It was starting to get late and Summer could feel how hungry she was. She'd been upstairs in her room for several hours, not daring to be anywhere else. She'd been playing with Beatrice and tried to ignore the silence from the house; she'd turned on some music and been in her own safe world. But now she was hungry. _

_"Mommy? I'm hungry." Her mother sat on a chair in the kitchen with a glass of red whine in front of her, staring into space. She didn't seem to notice Summer as she just sat there, not even moving to look at her daughter's face. "Please, I'm really hungry." _

_No answer this time either. So Summer decided to get something from the refrigerator herself. On the shelves she could reach were come vegetables, eggs, a bottle of juice and a pack of potatoes. She pulled out the bottle of juice and saw how the cereal stood on the kitchen table. "Mommy, can you give me a glass for the juice?" _

_As Joanne Roberts didn't reply Summer sat down on a kitchen chair, eating some dry cereal from the package and drinking the juice from its bottle. _

He'd disappeared as soon as the divorce was finished. He never called, never came back. And after some time, Summer got used to not have him around. She threw away everything he'd ever given her, all photos of him now had their place in a box inside her closet; she never expected to see him again. She tried forgetting and after a while all her was to her was a _biological father_.

vvvvvvvvv

_"Hi, it's Summer. Please leave a message." _

Seth quickly poured the coffee into his now empty mug, spilling half of it onto his hand and the table where it created a plate-formed brown pool. He cursed to himself and threw a napkin over his now pink hand. Hot coffee and a bad mood was just not a good combination.

His bad mood had come yesterday. He wasn't mad or anything, just worried to an extent where he felt absolutely helpless. Summer could be anywhere doing anything and he had no idea. Not that she always needed to tell him everything, but this was just different. He was worried of what she might be doing and not knowing what was the reason of her feelings did not make it better; it only made his worry grow. It could be anything. She didn't want to talk and she didn't answer her phone. She _always_ answered her phone.

All the more reason to worry.

The entire day he'd thought about driving to her place, just to make sure that she was alright. But something inside him told him that he should give her time, not push her. He knew that she knew she could trust him and tell him. Maybe he just had to be patient and wait; wait for Summer to come to him. Though it was starting to get dark outside and he knew that sleep wouldn't be anything he'd be doing before he knew that she was okay.

Throwing the napkin over the coffee on the table, Seth hurried out of his apartment, grabbing the car keys on the drawer.

vvvvvvvvv

Summer took one last look at the picture and then put it in the pocket of her jeans. She'd quickly changed clothes from her pyjamas as she couldn't stay in this place anymore. She'd been sitting on the floor for hours and now she just needed to get out; she was used to be outside a lot, walking around.

"You going on a date tonight?" a man in the stairs asked, grinning. She'd never seen him before, he was probably new. He seemed to know who she was though. "Maybe you're on your way to your _boyfriend_."

Summer shivered as he brushed by her arm. "Could you please move to the side, I can't-"

"I know. And sure, maybe you can't be late for your _boyfriend. _Maybe he'll get mad," the man went on, still wearing that awful grin on his face.Summer didn't answer and quickly slipped through the small area between him and the wall. She managed and hurried down the stairs. "Hey, babe! Maybe your man's gonna get lucky tonight."

She accidentally ran into another person at the end of the stairs because of her hurry. Mumbling a 'sorry' she went for the door. "You could stay here and I'll take care of you. I'm sure you'd like that!" The man called after her as she ran out of the building, into the dark.

_I really loved all of your guesses, some of you were even (almost) right. _

_Please let me know what you think!!!_


	15. Chapter 15

This is not a chapter as I'd wish it was, just an author's note... 

I'm more busy than I's expected to be, with school. This week's been hectic and the coming will not be fun. I have to do them though, if I want my grades to be any good. That means that I won't be able to update as soon as I'd hoped and said. I have to focuse on school for a while.

So, no writing for me. I feel really bad about this because I wanted to give you a new chapter so bad. With your amazing reviews you so deserve that. I've reached over 300 reviews! Though I hope that you'll understand and when I'm back I promise to have you a good chapter finished.

hugs

June


	16. Chapter 16

_I apologize for the long wait; I've been super busy. _

_Enjoy the new chapter and I'd appriciate if you reviewed as well!_

Come, stop your crying  
It will be all right  
Just take my hand  
Hold it tight

I will protect you  
From all around you  
I will be here  
Don't you cry

For one so small  
You seem so strong  
My arms will hold you  
Keep you safe and warm  
This bond between us  
Can't be broken  
I will be here  
Don't you cry

As Seth opened the door of the building it was quite the opposite from outside, people were talking and they stood everywhere; some had even made a little nest and were lying down. No kids were seen, fortunately. Because this place sure didn't look nice, on the contrary. He couldn't believe how Summer always left her door unlocked; anyone could come inside of her apartment and do God knows what.

Climbing up the stairs Seth held his breath, worried of what state he'd find Summer in. Would she let him in? If so, would she talk to him? Tell him what was going on.

"You're late, man." Seth abruptly turned around and was met by a strange looking man, dressed in a brown jumper that looked very old. "She left a while ago," he grinned, showing his terrible teeth. "Trouble in paradise?"

"What are you talking about?" Seth sighed, continuing to Summer's door. He carefully knocked at the dark wooden door but as he received no answer his knocking grew more urgent and loud. Assuming that she wouldn't have locked the door this time either he tried open it, with success.

Inside her apartment everything seemed to be normal; a little messy but still very clean. "Summer," Seth called out as he walked towards her bedroom. Maybe she would be in bed. Seeing that the apartment was empty Seth remembered the man in the hallway. Maybe he knew something.

"Hey, you." The brown shirted man turned around and Seth was relieved that he hadn't had to touch him. His long hair was so dirty that it smelled and he had so many spots of things no one would want to know what it was on his shirt.

He grinned. "You've realised that your girl isn't there?" Seth unsurely nodded, fumbling with his fingers nervously. He just wanted to find out where Summer was. "She's probably out there somewhere getting raped. You know, you should tell her that it's a dangerous world we live in." His grin only grew wider as he spoke, scaring the shit out of Seth.

Taking a deep breath he looked into the man's green eyes. "You know where she went?"

"Hey, don't expect me to baby-sit her. I offered her to stay here with me, but…"

After that Seth couldn't do much more than hurry down the stairs, out into the night in search for Summer.

vvvvvvvvv

Leaning against a tree Summer had her arms around herself, hugging her upper body in hope to get warmer. It was cold outside and the wind was blowing coolly, creating goose bumps on her skin. You could think that she'd learnt to bring a jacket or dress warmer since she so often was outside. But no, the reason of why she went home usually was because she was freezing. She wished that being outside would make her body get used to the temperature but sadly she was still the same petite person, always getting cold so easily.

Maybe if she walked around she wound get warmer, because she could not go back home. Not yet.

So, still with her arms crossed, her hands clutched into fists, she began to walk down the path. There weren't anyone else in the park; it was either too late or too dark for people to want to be in this one. Summer knew that it could be dangerous, especially for a lonely female like herself. But little did she care. She wasn't scared of things like this. If she would have been, she would never live in the area she did. Everyone knew and saw that it wasn't nice. Though to Summer, the area being nice or not didn't matter.

She was scared of hurting people, disappointing people. And all her life she'd tried to avoid that by saying no to any contact with another person. But lately, she'd got herself a few friends, a boyfriend.

And that was a big mistake.

A slim, tall body a few metres away from Summer made her suddenly freeze. She wasn't alone. Even though she wasn't afraid of getting hurt she'd rather not have any company. The person moved through the path, closer and closer, and once she could see the face she recognised it. She knew him.

Seth.

Summer felt how her heart started to beat faster; she could not let him see her. She did not need him right now; he needed to stay away from her. Picking up her pace she quickly moved away from his direction, anywhere out of his sight.

He'd had seen her though; she was not fast enough, or maybe she was too fast causing him to fallow her quick move. But he was on his way over to her, which only made Summer walk faster.

"Summer," he yelled as her fast walk turned into running. She ran fast, almost as fast as she could. And that only made Seth run after her, seeing that a running Summer only made him worry more. "Summer, please stop!"

To Summer's disappointment, Seth was really fast and caught up with her in no time. Catching his breath, silently cursing, Seth grabbed her arm and made it impossible for her to move. She tried though, tried getting out of his grip by kicking his leg and she tried to make his hand let go of her. Though he was very determined in keeping her where she was.

"Let go," Summer cried after a while of intense rage. "Don't do this,"

Seth though kept his grip around her, only tightening it and as she softly started to weep he brought her whole body into his embrace, holding her close. "Don't," she sobbed, relaxing in her whole body; she would have fallen to the ground if Seth didn't hold her up. "Cohen,"

Seth stroked her hair held her close to his chest, thanking God that she was okay. "Everything's okay now. You don't have to run." Summer only cried harder, digging her hands into his jacket. Just like that time a few months ago, when they'd met for the first time.

They stood there, in the middle of the park where the darkness only made it possible for them to see a few metres away. Seth held Summer, gently rocking her as she cried rivers of tears.

After a few minutes, when Seth started to notice how cold it was he pushed Summer away, searching her eyes. Her face was smeared with tears and her eyes so wet that it hurt to watch them. "Let's go. It's freezing," Seth managed to smile, put an arm around Summer and guided her through the park.

Without having to say anything, Summer felt how Seth placed his jacket over her shoulders in an attempt to make her warm. She hugged it tightly around her body, welcoming the warmth, careful though not to watch him.

Seth cleared his throat as they neared his car. "I'm taking you to my place; you can stay in the guestroom."

She shook her head, making an ugly face as she felt how she wanted to cry again. "No, Seth. I live just-"

"Summer, I will not let you get back there. You're coming with me."

"Why are you doing this to me?" Summer cried as he helped her into the car, determinedly putting on her seatbelt and ignoring her cries for him to stop.

Seth sighed as he sat down in the driver's seat, turning to catch her eyes with his own. "Because, Summer, I care about you. And no matter what you think, this place is dangerous and I won't let you stay there by yourself anymore."

vvvvvvvvv

"Hey, I made you tee." Seth walked out from the kitchen with a tray, sitting down next to her on the sofa and immediately letting his attention fall on Summer as she quietly sat there, showered and dressed in one of Seth's T-shirts and a pair of pants. "And sandwiches," he carefully added seeing that she didn't speak. Summer had been quiet since her last outburst in the car where she was yelling at him for forcing her to come. She'd taken a shower and let him give her some new clothes to wear, never met his eyes though.

Seth looked so hopeful and tried so hard to make everything good for her. How could he care so much? So much that she couldn't say no. She wanted to run away but she couldn't.

Taking a bite of her sandwich - she hadn't noticed how hungry she was until now -she slowly turned her head. "Thanks, Seth." She managed to smile and received a smile back from Seth. "And sorry about before."

The last sentence came out very weakly, as if she was embarrassed. And she was sort of, because she felt like she was so out of control. Now here she was, in Seth's apartment when she'd promised herself, said over and over in her head, that she wouldn't let anyone be close to her again. Because she only hurt them. And even if she at times didn't believe that, when Seth at times managed to convince her that she wasn't doing him any harm, she had to always stay away. Even if she didn't want to.

Because in the end she'd always hurt him.

Though his smile as he looked at her, his cute dimples and his concerned eyes; everything about him was so beautiful and she wanted to look at him forever. He made her believe in things, he made her hope. "The important thing is that you're here," he said. Still smiling slightly he leaned over to give her cheek a soft kiss.

And as his lips made contact with her skin Summer melted, his touch had the power to make her forget everything but him. Nothing else mattered but Seth. So without really thinking she threw her arms around his neck, pressing her lips against his and forcing him to lie down on the couch with herself on top.

She roughly kissed him and began to take her shirt of, though as she was about to sit up and draw it over her head two hands pushed her hands down from her shirt.

Seth gently tugged her shirt back down and sat up, touching his lips with a finger. They were swollen from her hard kiss. "Summer,"

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have…I shouldn't have done that. Sorry." Summer shifted on the couch, moving away from Seth and keeping her gaze at the cop of tee in front of her, almost crying.

"Hey," Seth's fingers grabbed after hers as he sighed. "You don't have to apologize, Sum."

Her eyes were brimmed with tears and she desperately tried to hold them back. "I shouldn't even be here. I'm so stupid!" Summer angrily put her head into her hands and groaned, screaming on the inside.

"Summer," Seth gently said while carefully moving closer to her. "You're not stupid." He put his hand up to touch her hands but she forced it away, kind of hitting him, and for a second she met his eyes with her teary own. Summer screamed and rushed out of the room, slamming a door which Seth guessed led to the guestroom.

He knocked at the door, calling her name. "Summer, I'm coming in."

She lay on the bed, on her stomach and with her face into a pillow. He could tell that she was crying as her body slightly shook. Everything was so wrong.

Seth still had no idea what was going on with her, but whatever it was; it was major. Because she was so broken; so devastated.

He sat down on the bed, just a few centimetres from where she lay. "Please talk to me."

_Please review!_


	17. Chapter 17

_**So sorry for the long wait. Please help me get some more inspiration by leaving a review. **_

_**I'm so bad in updating nowadays...**_

_**A big thank you to Mrs. Cohen who has been reminding me about this story lots of times. Thanks to you I was able to have it up today, on Christmas Day. Merry Christmas everybody and enjoy reading!**_

_"Please talk to me" _

"You should stay away from me," Summer, almost impossible to hear as she had her head pressed into the pillow, said. She lay huddled and a sniffle could be heard every other second.

Carefully reaching his hand - slightly afraid that she'd have the same reaction as before - up to her temple Seth gently moved his fingers up and down in a smooth motion. He wasn't sure of what to do, or if he should say anything. He wasn't good at giving comfort and he certainly had a gene or something that always made him say or do the wrong things.

He kept caressing her temple though, seeing that she did allow him to touch her. Some of her hair had fallen down into her face so he replaced it behind her ear. Finally, after a moment of silence, he said, "I don't want to stay away from you."

Summer slowly sat up, wiping a few tears from her face. She didn't look like she'd been crying; at least not like Seth had seen her before. Maybe that was because of the lack of make-up or the fact that she just had taken a shower. "You should though," she quietly told him.

He shook his head and took her hand in his. "Why?"

"Because," she said, her voice cracking. "I only hurt you." A tear fell from her eye, a big tear that quickly rolled down her face to her chin. In a whisper she added, "And I don't want to do that."

His grip on her hand tightened and he looked straight into her eyes. "Summer, you don't hurt me."

"I am right now!" Summer stubbornly exclaimed with tears now streaming down her face. "I'm not letting you into this mess," she sighed and Seth could see how the frustration grew. "Can't you see that I'm a mess here, Seth!?"

"Sum," he started kind of unsurely. She was a mess; he had to agree with that. _But,_ not a mess he didn't want to fix. "I want to be with you, I want to be here for you."

She smiled through her tears, sobbing and smiling at the same time and creating a weird facial expression Seth couldn't read. He couldn't tell if she was laughing or crying. She was probably crying though. "I know you do. But…you shouldn't need to take care of me as if I was a child. Okay?"

"Can't you tell me what happened?" Seth carefully asked. "We were fine yesterday morning. Did I do something?"

"No! No, Seth, you didn't," she said as fast as she could, very determined in letting him know that he wasn't the problem. "It's not you, at all. You're perfect."

"Then what is it?"

"Cohen,"

"If you're gonna break up with me, don't I deserve a reason?"

A hiccup escaped her dry throat; she knew that he had to know. He deserved to know. If there was anything she could do for him, she would. And he couldn't believe that he was the problem. "I saw my dad, right after we'd bought the cake."

"Oh," Seth said and understood that this was difficult for her. He knew that her father had left her.

"Yeah,"

"Did he see you?" Seth carefully asked.

"No, and I don't think he'd recognised me."

A silence fallowed. Summer stared down in her lap while Seth cautiously reached for her hand. "If you don't want to be a couple can't you at least stay here? As friends? You shouldn't go back there."

She looked up, surprised by his sadness in his voice. "Cohen, I really don't want you to-"

He kissed her hand and looked pleadingly into her eyes. "Summer. I want you to stay."

"Alright, I'll stay." She sighed and felt terrible for letting him do this. But she didn't have heart enough to say no.

"Good."

"At least for tonight," she quickly added and he smiled.

vvvvvvvvv

The next day Summer walked into the living room, fully dressed in some clothes she'd left at Seth's place a while ago. She felt a little better and as she saw Seth she was surprised that she didn't turn and head for the door.

He smiled as she appeared, holding up a bagel. "You hungry?"

"Yeah," she said with a small smile. Pouring herself some coffee she sat down with Seth and accepted the bagel. Neither of them said a word, just shot quick glances at each other.

"Sum?"

She hesitantly looked up, fearing that he would ask her more about what had happened. "You know about my dad's birthday?" She nodded and saw that he, too, looked scared. "You still want to come to the party?"

"I don't know," Summer unsurely said, lowering her head, her eyes focusing on the cup of coffee.

"I know my mom wants to see you again. And Marissa will be there." Seth spoke in an attempt to convince her.

In a low voice she asked, "Do you want me to come?"

Seth knew that he wanted her to come; he really wanted her to come. "Yeah, but you don't have to just because-"

"Then I'll go. It's not like I have anything else to do." She owed him so much so coming to a party was the least she could do. And besides, a part of her wanted to meet his family again. And Marissa. Causing that smile he had on his face was reason enough as well.

"Okay. Great!"

"Great!" Summer grinned.

Another silence fallowed and again Seth was the one to break it. "Sum, could you promise me something?"

"What?"

"Promise me to never disappear from my life." Summer frowned and looked at him questioningly. "Even if you feel like you want to, don't. At least without having a very good reason to."

"Cohen-"

He interrupted her, "Could you promise that?"

Nodding she answered him. "Okay, I promise."

vvvvvvvvv

Summer and Seth stood outside of the Cohen's house, Seth dressed in a suit and looking really handsome while Summer wore a white halter dress. She had her hair in a low, elegant ponytail and was holding Seth's arm.

"My mom's gonna be thrilled that you came."

Summer grinned and began to walk to the door, not giving Seth a reply to that. She had been kind of happy to be back here, where she felt like she actually had a life. Even though she so many times just wanted to stay in and hide, not talk to anyone, she secretly enjoyed this; dressing up and going to a fancy party.

Seth shrugged, slightly confused by her happy appearance, but since she was smiling and looking happy there was no way he could deny her to enjoy this party.

"Seth! Summer!" Sandy had opened the door and immediately brightened up as he saw his son with girlfriend, or whatever she was these days. He wasn't sure if they were a couple, Seth had never confirmed anything. But it sure looked like it. Either way, Sandy was happy that Seth finally had found himself someone as great as Summer.

"I'm glad you could make it," he said and received a hug from them both. "Come on in." Summer watched how Seth and his father hugged and smiled. Seth was lucky.

As Sandy left them to great some new guests Seth took Summer's hand and led her over to the bar where they got some drinks.

Sipping some of the liquid Summer couldn't help but glance up at Seth. He was wearing a black suit which made him look really hot, his hair was perfectly messy and the whole time he had this serious mixed with bored look on his face. How could a guy be this perfect? He was good-looking, cute, smart, kind, funny; the list could go on forever.

_Then why are you pushing him away? _A voice in her head asked, causing Summer to frown. _He's the best thing that has ever happened to you._

"Sum?" Seth said and forced her back to reality. She quickly placed a smile on her face, trying to push all the hard thoughts away. "You okay?"

"Uh-huh."

"Kay. Good. Take a look over there and you'll see something funny." He pointed in direction to the kitchen and as Summer fallowed his eyes she spotted Kirsten and Marissa standing by the counter. They were preparing some kind of food though it didn't look very good. "Maybe you should go help them,"

"Maybe," Summer smiled. She had missed having girls around and she was really glad that Seth had told her to go talk to them. That way she didn't have to make an excuse. "You'll be okay?"

"Yeah. I'll find Ryan or something. You go."

Touching his arm slightly, just in a quick brush, Summer gave him another smile and then hurried to the kitchen.

"Hey, man." Ryan appeared where Summer just had been standing, hands in his pockets. "Been abandoned by your lady, too?"

"Yeah. Except she's not my lady." Seth looked over to where the three women stood, now laughing. Marissa had her hand on Summer's arm and they were laughing hysterically.

"She's not?"

Seth sighed. "We're back to being friends."

"Her idea?" Ryan asked as he noticed Seth's happy facial expression as he was watching the brunette laugh.

"Yeah."

vvvvvvvvv

Marissa dragged Summer upstairs, a place where Summer never had been before. They couldn't hear much from the party; here it was quiet and still. In the hallway a few lamps were lit but otherwise it was empty and dark. All the doors were shut but Marissa didn't seem to care about that. She opened a door without hesitation and pushed Summer with her inside.

"Marissa, what are you doing?"

She laughed. "I'm showing you Seth's room."

Summer looked around. It did look like it could have been his room. Blue and the walls covered with posters. "It's a cool room."

"Yeah. He had a lot of stuff," Marissa said and flicked through some old comic books. "Comics,"

"He read comics?"

The blonde nodded. "He did. A lot, I think. But I didn't really know him back then." Marissa hesitated, not sure what to say.

"I know," Summer said and ignored Marissa's guilty look.

Suddenly the door closed with a slam, causing both girls to jump, and a person walked inside the room. Seth. "Hey, guys. I see you've found it,"

"Found it?" Marissa asked with a grin.

"Yeah, the place where it all happened," Seth smirked and sat down on the bed.

Summer made a face. "Ew! Cohen!"

"What?! It's true." Marissa shot him a warning glance. "Okay, so it's not. But it could have been."

"Could have? That doesn't count, Seth." Summer said and was about to ask Marissa when she noticed that her friend wasn't there. "Hey, where did-"

"Marissa go? Probably got tired of us." Seth explained with a shrug. "I'm used to it."

"Yeah, me too I guess." Summer softly said and sat down next to Seth, her hands in her lap.

Seth sighed and looked around the room. "I used to live here," he stated.

Summer giggled. "I know." She smiled and her eyes fell on a plastic horse that stood on the desk. "You had a plastic horse?"

"Yeah. Captain Oats. My best friends. I can't believe I actually left him here."

"I had one, too. Princess Sparkle." Summer smiled and went to grab Captain Oats where he stood on a scrap book. A few pens lied next to it and one paper seemed to have fallen out from the book. "Can I look?" Summer nervously asked, biting her lip.

Seth shrugged and smiled at her cuteness. "Go ahead."

Opening the scrap book and taking a seat in the chair standing by the desk Summer gasped. Inside were several drawings, really good drawings. "God, Cohen. Did you make these?"

vvvvvvvvv

Seth threw the leaves from the flower into his empty glass, watching how they stuck to the sides where it was wet from the liquor.

How could she one minute be totally fine, laughing and smiling, and the next so drastically change into someone else. Tonight it had been as if she'd never seen her father, never shut him out or spend several days crying or staring out the window. He needed to get her back to her therapist. Or something. Because seeing her in pain was breaking his heart every time.

"Hey," Summer softly said as she walked up to him where he stood on the driveway. "Watcha doing?"

"Nothing." He emptied his glass and began to walk up to the house.

Summer grabbed his arm though. "Please, wait!"

Taken by surprise Seth stopped and turned back around only to see how her eyes were glistening with tears. She desperately held his gaze though and drew him closer with her hand. "Can you forgive me?" she asked, her voice unsteady.

"Forgive you for what?" Seth questioned, taking her hand that had been on his arm, intertwining their fingers.

"Everything."

Her word was only in a whisper and Seth could see how she fought to keep the tears inside. "I have nothing to forgive you for. You've done no wrong."

"I've been playing with your feelings, Seth. I've sent you mixed signals. I've hurt you. I've-" Seth placed a finger on her pink lips to silence her.

"You're the best thing that's happened to me."

Summer froze, the sad look on her face turned blank and her eyes grew double its size. And as Seth came closer to her she didn't even dare to breath, or blink. His hand went up to her face, caressing her cheek so lightly that her whole body slightly began to shake. His touch made her legs feel like they would fail her and as he slowly kissed her chin her whole body relaxed, welcoming his touch.

His lips moved from her chin and up to the side of her mouth, finally capturing hers in the most light and careful kiss both of them had ever experienced. As Seth felt how she responded, and allowed him to touch her, he brought his arms around her petite body. Still very careful he opened his mouth and touched her soft lips with his tongue, and as she just as slow and careful parted her lips and invited his tongue into her warm mouth Summer brought her arms up around his neck, pushing herself closer against him.

_**Please give me a review! They mean the world and they do (even if you might not think so) make me update faster.**_


	18. Chapter 18

**_I promised you a new chapter before the year ends and here it is. Unfortunately I haven't been able to reply to all reviews (some problems with the site) and I'm sorry. I don't usually post before responding to you all but a promise is a promise and for once I wanted to keep one._**

_**Enjoy and please review. I'll respond to you all! If the problem will be fixed that will say...**_

The rays from the sun shone onto Summer's head, creating dancing sparkles in her hair. She was squinting slightly to the sun and opened a few buttons of her pink cardigan.

"Nice weather we have today, huh," Seth said, he too squinting his eyes.

"It's a little too hot for my taste, but sure it's nice." Summer pulled the shirt off of her and was left in a white, thin top. Seth couldn't help but notice how her skin seemed to glow; a little more tanned then when he'd first met her. He watched how she continued to walk by his side, watched her profile. She really had a cute nose, nice skin and perfect lips. Her lips felt good, too. "Cohen? Are you checking me out?" She was smiling but still not caring to turn her head; she just kept walking.

"Maybe," Seth replied with a grin. "You're nice to look at."

Summer giggled and slipped her small fingers into his hand, intertwining them with his. "If you want you can buy me ice cream."

"If I want?"

"Yes," she answered innocently, giving him a smile impossible to turn down. He laughed and dragged her toward the ice cream stand.

While eating the dripping ice cream they stood leaning against the railing, their sides touching. "You seem happy today," Seth stated while he licked some of his strawberry ice cream that had rolled down the cone.

Summer seemed to think for a while before answering in a bright tone, "I feel really good today." Seth grinned and turned to look at her, letting his ice cream continue to melt as he leaned over to eat some of Summer's. "Hey! That's mine."

"I bought it so technically, it's mine. And besides I only took a small bite. You can have some of my strawberry if you want." He offered her his melting one which she surprisingly licked on. Seth moved his hand though so that Summer's nose tip got covered in ice cream.

"Seth!"

"Sorry." He quickly kissed away the ice cream and made sure that her nose was back to being perfect. Placing his forefinger on it and giving her a smile he planted a kiss on her wet lips. "Wanna know something?"

Summer nodded while giggling. "Yes."

Seth kissed her again. "It's a secret."

Summer pulled away slightly, taking another lick of his ice cream. "I can keep a secret."

"Really," he said and pecked her lips.

Nodding against him, causing their noses to meet in an Eskimo kiss, she decisively spoke. "Tell me."

"Alright," Seth carefully said and turned serious. In a whisper he finally said, "I love you, Summer." And just like that Summer dropped her ice cream and gripped the railing. She began to breathe hard and had to focus on not forgetting about her breathing. "Sum? You okay?" Seth watched how she gasped for air and held the railing so hard that her hands whitened. He threw his ice cream away and panicked. "Oh my God, I'm calling 911."

He reached for his cell but as he was about to dial the number Summer flung her arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. He felt how she pressed her face into his neck and after checking if she was breathing properly he lifted her up just a few inches from the ground and kissed the side of her face. "You scared me."

She nodded and a few seconds later looked up at him with her big brown eyes. Seth could see traces of tears in the corners but as she smiled he leaned down for a kiss. She responded eagerly and smiled into his mouth. "Sorry, you just caught me by surprise."

"Then I'm the one who's sorry." Starting to laugh he looked down at her. "You asked me though, and I told you it was a secret."

Summer giggled and replaced her feet on the ground. "I'm glad you told me. I have a secret as well."

"Yeah?"

"I can't tell you yet though."

"I can wait," Seth smirked and kissed her for the hundredth time this morning.

vvvvvvvvv

"I cancelled my apartment yesterday," Summer said as she painted her toe nails in a light green colour. "So now I officially have to start working more. To afford a new place."

Seth looked up from the paper he was reading where he lay on the sofa. "You can stay here."

She nodded. "I know, but if so I want to help you with the rent. I know you don't need it and I can't offer much but-"

"I'll let you help me if you want to," he quickly said, accepting that she had her pride. "But you hate your work."

She _did_ hate her work and her boss. Sighing she continued to paint her nails. "I know. What choice do I have though?"

"You could quit and try something else," Seth suggested from the couch.

Summer thought about it for a moment, holding the small brush in her hand. "I don't have anything else. But I guess I could look."

"That's what I'm talking about."

Summer smiled and held up her feet for him to look. "Do you like the colour?"

"Sure." He then got up from the couch, leaving the paper. "Hey, you want something to eat? I'm kind of hungry."

"Yeah. Let me help you." She started to get up as well.

"No, you stay there doing…that thing with your toes. Or whatever. I can do it."

Defeated, Summer sank down into the armchair again. "Alright. But you have to let me make you breakfast or something tomorrow. And dinner."

"You don't have to do that."

"I want to. For once I want to do something for you."

"Okay. But tomorrow." Seth smirked and disappeared from Summer's sight.

Leaning back into the armchair and pulling a pillow into her lap she, not for the first time this day, thought about everything that had happened. Today, this week, the past months and her whole life. Everything was pretty crazy.

The depression, Seth showing up, meeting a therapist, getting actual friends, seeing her father again. And of course, Seth dropping those three words. The three words no one had uttered in her presence for a long time. Even if she tried really hard to remember, the last time didn't exist in her memory. Never had she spoken them herself either, not to anyone.

In movies, most movies, all the people found it so easy to say it; show that kind of affection towards another human being. They always said it so casually, like it was the most natural words existing. Summer had, many times, shivered and got that knot in her throat that she so often had while watching those scenes. Because hearing those words never ceased to make her emotional and wonder how it felt like; to hear it, to say it.

One time Summer had promised herself that sometime she would say them, someone would hear her voice utter an 'I love you'. And someone would say it back. Though that promise had quickly turned into a new one; to never let anyone come that close, not to let another person show her what love was.

Now, she wasn't sure what to do or what to say. She knew that Seth made her happy, the happiest she'd ever been. He made her laugh and feel confident. Seth made her be a person she had only dreamt about; someone who had been hiding inside of her for so many years.

"_Summer, why are you and Seth friends again?" Marissa asked as the two girls stood in the Cohen's kitchen. _

"_We've always been friends, Coop." _

"_You know what I mean. What changed?" _

_Summer glanced over at her friend, thinking hard of a way to get out of this. Though Marissa's blue eyes were so sincere and calming that she felt like she could tell her anything. "I pushed him away. Like I always do." _

"_But you two really like each other." _

"_I know. It's just that…" Summer interrupter herself. _

"_What?" _

"_I don't even know. I guess I don't want to disappoint him any more." _

"_If you've disappointed him, would he still try this hard?"_

Could he really love her? Like actually _love_ her? Love was a big word, at least in Summer's world. How could he love her and how could he know that he did? Maybe he just thought he loved her.

The moment he'd said it, she'd been so taken aback, so surprised. She hadn't known how to react, or respond. Though what she had known was that him saying that to her made her warm inside and after a while she had felt butterflies in her stomach. That had to be a sign, a sign that it made her happy. If she could have, if she'd been able to, Summer would have said it back. She wanted to say it back to Seth. And she almost had, before she realised that it wasn't as easy as she'd always thought and imagined.

Checking that her nails had dried Summer rose and walked with quick steps to the kitchen where Seth was. "Summer! I was just about to ask you if you want-"

Summer pressed her lips against his and took the pack of spaghetti from his hand, placing it on the counter. Her warm tongue pushed itself into his mouth and she kissed him with such force, and pressed her body against him so hard that he had to walk them to the wall not to fall backwards. She had a handful of his shirt and was tugging at it eagerly. Seth smiled into her kiss and leaned forward a bit, wrapping his arms around her waist and lifting her effortlessly so that she could wrap her legs around his torso.

She, not so carefully, drew her fingers through his thick hair while continuing to kiss him as Seth walked them to his bedroom. He was about to ask her if she really wanted to do this but her lips never left his if not only for a short moment to get some air, making it impossible for him to speak a single word. As Seth put her down onto the bed, she standing on her knees, Summer took the opportunity to pull his shirt off. She threw it on the floor and immediately brought her hands to his chest, touching him like she'd never done before.

He was about to take her top off when she stopped him, shyly meeting his eyes. "I'm not very good at this," she whispered breathing awfully hard. "I mean, I haven't-"

Seth silenced her with a kiss. "Don't worry about it. Don't think." He laughed and continued to tug at her top.

"I haven't shaved my legs and I should shower first," Summer weakly tried, feeling embarrassed. She gently traced her fingers over Seth's chest, fallowing her finger with her eyes.

"Look at me, Sum." Seth forced her gaze up to him. "You're perfect. Don't worry so much. I haven't shaved my legs either," he said and smiled. That caused Summer to laugh and she felt even more comfortable as he lay down with her on the bed, caressing her upper arm. "Okay?"

She nodded and smiled. "Okay."

vvvvvvvvv

Summer opened her eyes, trying to figure out why she was in bed while it was still light outside. And why she was naked; sleeping naked was weird.

An arm lay over her stomach and turning her head to the side she saw a sleeping Seth laying next to her, he naked too. Summer almost began yelling as she realized what they'd done. _This day was just crazy_. He'd told her that he loved her and then made love to her. Could this be a dream? It certainly seemed like it; nothing ever went this well for Summer Roberts.

Everything had been perfect. Absolutely perfect. Seth had been so loving and gentle, always making sure that she was comfortable.

"Seth Cohen, what are you doing with me?"

**_End of chapter. I have lots of idea for upcoming chapters so don't see this as a happy ending. :)_**

**_Please review!_**


	19. Chapter 19

**This took a little longer, sorry about that. It was a difficult chapter, hopefully you'll like how it turned out though. I had a feeling that this story was getting a little too fluffy so it was particularly hard to continue things from last chapter. **

**As usual the reviews has been wonderful, but I don't think I've replied to you all. For several days so many reviews came into my mailbox that I didn't even know if I had replied to them already or how old they were. This time though, I promise to sort it all out and send you all replies (to those who'll review that will say). **

**One thing that I might not have made very clear in the last chapter was whether or not Summer was a virgin. And she wasn't. If you remember from previous chapters I've mentioned that she isn't. Sorry about the confusion. **

**Anyway, enjoy the chapter!**

"I've tried to do what you told me, push all the negative things in my life away. Concentrate on the positive and doing whatever makes me feel happy," Summer explained as she sat in front of Christie a few days later. "And I have to say that it's working. I haven't even cried for several days."

"That's very good, Summer." Christie shifted in her chair and tied her hands together in her lap. "Though you must be able to separate the negative things with the issues you have to deal with. To run away from the problems is not a way to fix them."

Summer nodded. "I know. But I don't think I am doing that, running away. I quit my job because I wasn't happy with it, and I've moved out of my apartment. That's not running away, it's taking care of the problems. Right?"

"Yes. That's a good way for you to get a new start. But that wasn't what I meant; I was talking about the issue with your father."

"Oh," she said and felt how all of that positive thinking and joyful mood disappeared.

"Summer, I am not saying that you're doing the wrong thing not seeing him or thinking about him. What I mean though is that you have to make a decision."

After a few seconds of silence, Christie waiting for it to sink in, Summer sighed. "I do think about him, sometimes," she confessed, tucking some hair behind her ear.

"And what are you thinking?"

"I just wonder what he's like. If he ever thinks about me, if he remembers me."

"Have you thought about what to do, if you should contact him, or have you shut him out and gotten over him?"

Summer frowned, surprised by Christie's forwardness. She was not used to being pushed, and she certainly didn't like it. Though, seeing that Christie was an educated psychologist and a pretty good one as well, Summer figured that she must have a reason. "I don't know. I guess I haven't. It's been easier that way." She paused. "Everything's been going really good lately, with Seth and all. I don't want him to ruin everything. He's already ruined too much."

"I can understand that, Summer. But by ignoring the problem it will only grow worse."

"So I have to meet him," Summer asked with a confused look on her face.

Christie shook her head, the blonde curls falling into her face. "No, not meet him. Just decide who he is to you. What importance you're going to give him."

"But bringing him up again will stop these past days of bliss," she whined.

"Summer, I know that you're happy and having a great time with Seth. But you can't go on with this in your head. And I'm positive that Seth will be supportive and understand."

The brunette groaned, putting her head in her hands. "I know he will. I just want him to have a normal girlfriend for once. I always come with my big problems. He needs some normal."

"Sweetie, I promise you that if you don't do this it'll only get worse. Because no matter if you want or not, you'll have to deal with this eventually. And it's better to do it now."

vvvvvvvvv

Seth stood just near the front door, awaiting Summer's arrival. He was a bit worried since her last therapy sessions had brought her home in a wonderful mood and the last couple of days she'd been happy all the time. Which was quite rare for Summer. Of course he was happy that she was happy but Seth was kind of waiting for a breakdown. Or something. She hadn't even talked about her father and he'd seen how upset she'd become as she'd seen him after all those years. Therefore it seemed quite weird that she so quickly and easily could forget about it.

So when the door opened Seth jumped and quickly tried to act like he just hung out by the door, polishing it with his shirt. And that may not be the best idea he'd had but at the moment Seth believed it was the best explanation of why he was by the door. Innocently smiling, while still polishing the door with the sleeve of his shirt, Seth tried to read Summer's face. Was she as happy as she'd been when she left? Or did she have traces of tears in her face?

"Cohen?" Summer frowned and looked at Seth's hand covered by his shirt. "You okay?" She put her purse on the table and took her grey jacket off.

Seth nodded. "Yes! I'm totally okay."

"If you say so," Summer sighed and started to walk away. Seth quickly put his shirt back in its place and ran after her.

"How about you? Was the meeting good?"

"It was fine," Summer simply said and continued to walk away.

"Fine?" Seth nervously scratched his head, sensing that Summer wasn't fine. "What do you mean _fine_? Any progress? You want to talk to me about something?"

"No."

"Okay? But don't you want me to make you something and we can just chat?" Seth suggested.

"Seth, what's with the questions? You never ask me questions."

"Right. But I thought I could try something new." He awkwardly looked at her, fumbling with his fingers.

"My therapy session was _fine_. End of story." Summer walked straight into the guestroom where she hadn't been sleeping for the past days but still had all her things and closed the door behind her, clearly not wanting Seth's company at the moment.

"Sorry," Seth whispered and walked out to the balcony. At least he got his answer; she was not as happy as she'd been when she left. She was irritated and had probably talked about her father.

He sunk down in one of the three chares, immediately smashing his head into the glass table. Why did he always have to be so stupid? For someone like him, someone that always had been one of the smart people in school, these things never worked out. You could think that someone like himself would know how to treat a lady, but somehow Seth's brain stopped working properly while being around other people. And unfortunately his _charm _didn't really matter once he'd pissed off someone.

Touching his forehead with his hand, as if to see if he had gotten himself a bruise, Seth sat up, this time leaning his head back into the chair.

A few minutes later Summer appeared, a blanket wrapped around her body and with a very guilty-looking face. "Sorry," she softly said and slowly sat down in the chair next to Seth's. "I didn't mean to be a bitch."

Seth gave her a small smile, glad that she wasn't locked inside the guestroom. He would really be freaking out if he realised that she had done that. So, instead of asking what had happened to make her all _weird _like he desperately wanted to, Seth tried to be calm and not show her his concern. "It's okay. I can get a little annoying sometimes."

Summer sighed and realized that she had to tell him. Biting her lip and hesitantly looking over at him she spoke. "It's just that, my therapist…she brought up my father. And she told me that I can't ignore that it's a problem because then it's only gonna get worse. I have to deal with it so that I can move on." She unsurely looked over at Seth, giving him that look that always made him remember just how amazing he thought she was.

"Thanks for telling me that." Seth smiled, taking her hand in his and lightly rubbing her knuckles. Very carefully, slightly afraid to upset her, he continued. "I think I agree with your therapist. I think you have to do this."

"I know. But I...It's just hard, you know?"

"Yeah." Seth hesitantly drew her closer to him, up from her chair and into his lap. She accepted his movement and curled up into his embrace. "I'll help you though. If you want."

Sinking into his body, feeling as small and vulnerable as a little child, Summer made a nod against his chin. Things were going to work out, right?

vvvvvvvvv

"Hey, Coop?" Summer took a bite of her pastry, eating it with patience and savouring the taste of the soft chocolate. Opposite her Marissa was eating a similar cake, and as Summer spoke the blonde looked up from her plate. "Can you cook?"

"A little, yeah. Why?"

Summer blushed and made a little laugh. "I can't. And I need to make Seth dinner."

"Seth's expecting you to cook for him?"

"No. It's not like that. I just, I really want to make him something. He always cooks for me and I," she paused and felt how her cheeks heated, "want to give him something."

"Alright. A romantic dinner for two." Marissa grinned and caused Summer to blush even more.

"Will you help me?"

"Of course I will. Though I'm not some expert."

"Hey, me either. I have never cooked something nice. I've always stuck to the easy things."

"I have a cook book though. I'm sure we'll find something good."

Summer smiled. "Thanks, Coop. I really want to do this for him."

"He's gonna appreciate it." Marissa said and continued to eat her cake. After on bite though she looked at Summer again, nervously playing with her spoon. "By the way, what are you doing Wednesday?"

Summer shrugged. "Nothing, I guess. Since I quit my job I have so much time. Why?"

"I'd like you to come with me for a thing."

"A thing?"

"Yes. It kind of a secret."

"Oh, but don't I have to know? If I'm gonna come with."

"Yes. I meant that it's a secret to everyone else."

"What is it then?"

"I have an appointment."

"Doctor?" Marissa nodded. "Are you okay?"

"Yes. I've just been feeling a little weird lately. Nothing serious though, I hope. Will you come?"

"Of course I'll come." Summer reached over the table to take her Marissa's hand, concerned for her friend but happy to be there for someone.

An hour later, when the two girls was on their way home, Marissa's phone started to ring. She apologetically gave Summer a smile before answering. "Hello?"

Summer saw how Marissa's happy face turned serious and she worriedly glanced over at Summer. She didn't say anything into the phone, only listened. And as soon as she could she put it down and increased the speed.

"Is everything okay?" Summer asked, placing a hand on Marissa's shoulder. She looked awfully pale and scared.

Swallowing, the blonde shook her head. "Summer, something happened."

"What do you mean?"

"There was an accident. We need to go to the hospital."

**This time I used a cliffhanger. I don't usually do it but thought it fitted good here and it's fun. :) Tell me what you think, please. And let me know what you think will happen. That's always fun to know and who knows, maybe I'll even add a few things into next chapter. So ideas, suggestions or whatever are very welcomed. **

**Favourite lines and stuff are also very great to receive. Thanks again Mrs. Cohen!**

**I have this great (!) idea for a new story but I've decided not to post anything before I've finished this one and 'A Heart's Desire'. I'm really excited about the new one though but I'm really going to try hard and finish these two stories before I'll post. I don't want to have too many stories going at the same time and definitely not another hiatus. **

**Please leave a review!**


	20. Chapter 20

**I just had to give you a new chapter. So prepare for a chapter I wrote in a rush; it's not edited either. **

**Thanks for the reviews, people! Amazing as usual. And the cause of this 'quick' update.**

**Enjoy! **

Summer impatiently squeezed her hands together in her lap, looking out through the window and trying to suppress all the thoughts that were circulating in her head. She wasn't sure what she was feeling, so many things were blurring her mind.

"You okay, Summer?" Marissa asked where she sat next to her, in the driver's seat speeding towards the hospital. A concerned look covered her pretty face, causing Summer to immediately look back out through the window. She had had enough of pity, and this time it wasn't about her. Summer was okay; she would deal with it and be strong.

Silently uttering a 'yeah' to Marissa she concentrated on what her therapist always had told her. _Be positive, focus on the good things even if it's hard to find. Do not let your thoughts or others bring you down. And don't isolate yourself, hide or run away from things. _She would do it, this was a test for her and a chance to show and prove that she wasn't an impossible case. Seth had always believed in her, that she could be strong and she would now prove him right.

"We're there in a few minutes, don't worry."

"I know." Summer managed to give Marissa a small smile, showing her that everything was okay. Or at least it would be. She took a deep breath, closed her eyes and prayed; _it had to be okay._

vvvvvvvvv

Ryan rose from the pink sofa as soon as he spotted the two girls coming in their direction. His girlfriend had an arm around Summer, who looked very uncomfortable, and quickly met his gaze.

"We came as fast as we could." Marissa let go of Summer and gave Ryan a hug before turning to Sandy and Kirsten. "Any news?"

Summer sat down in a sofa and tried to ignore the terrible feeling she had in her stomach. This was so wrong. Seth's parents shook their heads and looked at each before Sandy spoke, "He'll be okay. But we'll know more when the doctor's finished with him."

_Finished with him? _What the hell was that supposed to mean? Before anyone could say more Summer stood up and quickly walked out of the room, not looking back. She needed some air.

He was going to be okay. After hearing those words a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. It was just now she realized how scared she'd been. Seth had been in an accident. A car had hit him when he was walking over the road. He could have died. She wasn't even sure how he was, if he would have any broken bones or if he was awake. All she knew was that he would be okay. But what did okay mean? Okay as he'll live or okay as in he'll get back to the same Seth he was a few hours ago?

Summer couldn't stop the thoughts coming; if he had died. Her whole world would break if he disappeared from her life. Seth was the only one she really trusted, the only one who could make her believe that she was a good person and that she was loveable. He loved her, he'd told her that. And she'd never believed in someone as much as in him.

"Summer? Are you alright?" She quickly turned around and was surprised to see Kirsten stand there. "Seth's gonna be just fine, you know."

Summer nodded, feeling awkward. It felt a little weird to be alone with his mother; Seth wasn't there and Marissa wasn't there. It was just Kirsten and she. "I know. I was just…scared."

"I was, too. I still am."

"Do you know, what injures he has?" Summer carefully asked, fumbling with her fingers.

The blonde shook her head. "Not yet. But the doctor should come tell us soon."

"Oh,"

"Why don't you and I go get some coffee for us all?"

"Sure."

vvvvvvvvv

Seth smiled when they walked into the room. He was awake. And he looked the same. Almost anyway. A few bruises could be seen and he had his left arm in a cast.

"Hey, guys! Don't look so concerned. I'm perfectly fine." He smiled brightly and accepted the hug from his mother.

Everyone else gave him a hug until it was just Summer left. She carefully leaned down and hugged him. It felt so good to be near him again, to feel him. "I'm glad you're okay."

"Of course I'm okay. I wouldn't leave you that easily." Summer laughed and kissed his cheek. "And besides, this is a pretty good way to gather the whole family." He squeezed Summer's hand and gave her a smile. The _whole_ family, Summer included. "By the way I love you all."

"Aww, sweetie." Kirsten went to hug him again, tears blurring her eyes. "We love you, too."

Summer smiled and let go of his hand. He really had an amazing family; they were all so nice to her. "Why don't we all have dinner at our place when you'll get out of here?" Sandy suggested. Ryan and Marissa seemed to agree and Seth looked at Summer, searching for her answer.

"Alright. That'd be great." She even surprised herself with those words and as she met Seth's eyes she saw that he was a bit surprised as well. He looked really happy though, holding her gaze for quite long.

"Good. Now I just have to figure something out as food."

"Maybe we should go talk to the doctor, Sandy," Kirsten said and motioned for her husband to follow her.

Ryan cleared his throat and also tried o excuse himself. Marissa jumped in. "We have to get you something from the gift shop." The four quickly exited the room, leaving Seth in his bed and a shy Summer at the end of it.

"Why are you way over there?" Seth asked laughing. "Come here."

Summer slowly walked around the bed, approaching his left side. She carefully took his hand and concentrated on the way his hand squeezed hers with her gaze. She wasn't quite sure of why she was so feeling so awkward, so shy. Seth usually made her relax after a few seconds and she seldom felt awkward around him nowadays.

She was hoping that he wouldn't notice but unfortunately he had. "Is something wrong?" Bringing her hand up to his face he gently kissed it, trying to get her to look at him.

"No," Summer softly said, desperately wanting to make everything normal.

"Summer, I can see that something is."

With a big sigh she carefully sat down on his bed, not too close to his body, and finally met his gaze. "I don't know."

He brought her closer, letting her rest against his chest. "Want to tell me?"

"Somehow I always make things about me, don't I?" she sadly laughed and laid her head down onto his comforting shoulder.

"I don't mind." Seth said causing a smile to spread on her face. "Now, what's wrong?"

"I guess…it might be a little about my father and a little about you," Summer unsurely started.

"Me? What about me?"

"Well, for start I've been really worried about you. You were literary hit by a car!" Seth smiled but let her continue, caressing her arm to support her. "I'm so relieved that you're okay. I wouldn't know what to do without you. I was so scared that you wouldn't be okay."

"I'm gonna be just fine, Summer." Seth brought her even closer, hugging her to his body as good as he could with the injured arm.

"I know."

A moment of silence fallowed, Seth planting a few kisses on top of her head while stroking her arm reassuringly. After a while he said, "What's the other thing?"

"Um, I don't know if I should tell you."

"Why not?" he laughed.

Summer uncomfortably laughed. "Um, because."

"Just because?"

"Yes. Because."

He gave up, hating the fact that she didn't tell him but not enough to make her to. "Alright, I won't force you to tell me."

"Thanks."

"Now, about your father."

"I don't want to think about him." Summer quickly said, before he could say anything. "Please?"

"You're not very talkative today, alright. I'll leave you alone. But just because I am in the hospital and I like you so much."

vvvvvvvvv

Later that day after dinner Summer was making things comfortable for Seth in his parents' couch. He had just a few minutes ago, when she asked, admitted that his arm hurt a little. And that was reason enough for Summer to tuck him down in the sofa and make him hot chocolate. "Are you comfortable? Maybe another blanket?"

Seth shook his head and grinned. "I'm feeling like a princess."

Summer laughed. "Okay." She kissed him on the lips, smiling down at him while holding his cheek. "Be right back."

Seth smirked and moved the blanket a little, for Summer had tucked him in so well that every inch of his body – except from his face – was covered with the warm blanket. He really liked the fact that Summer was so affectionate and all but seeing her in the hospital, close to tears as she'd worried so much made him wonder what was wrong. And what were the things she didn't want to tell him?

Seth knew that he didn't have to know everything about her; she should be able to have her secrets. Though she had said that it was about him which definitely made him curious. Why couldn't she just tell him? He would have to talk to her when they got home, or the next day. Not only about her 'secret' but also about her father. He knew that it was painful for her but she had to deal with it, whether she wanted to or not. And he would help her with that.

"What are you thinking about? You look all serious." Summer had come back into the room.

"You're back! Come here." He sat up but only got halfway as she quickly came to his side, mad that he had ruined the blanket.

"You are not allowed to move, Cohen. You've just been hit by a car!"

"So you keep telling me, my love." Seth said and kissed the side of her face, bringing her with him back into the cushions.

**That's it. Let me know your thoughts, even if it was a crappy chapter. My opinion at least. **

**Review, please!**


	21. Chapter 21

Summer watched how the smoke became darker and stretched wider and listened to the load sound from the fire detector. The oven couldn't even be seen anymore and hysterically trying to figure out what to do, Summer held her forefinger under the water tap. It hurt, just like her eyes hurt from the warmth and her lungs from the fumes.

It was a disaster and she was partly glad that she couldn't see how the kitchen looked like. She'd probably ruined everything. The crying had been going on for the last fifteen minutes but she'd been on the edge for the past hour. Summer had managed to destroy most of the food; burning it all, setting fire on the steak and forgetting about the recipe. Which resulted in a total chaos.

Wrapping a towel around her throbbing hand Summer hurried to the phone; she knew that the whole apartment would be damaged if she didn't do anything soon.

"Summer, how's it going?" Marissa joyfully said in the phone, having no idea of what was going on a few kilometres away.

Despite her crying Summer managed to explain the situation; how the dinner was ruined, the kitchen on fire and Seth coming home in an hour. The whole time it was quiet in the phone. "And I don't know what to do!" she finished, devastated. "Seth can't come home to this."

Marissa breathed and tried to take control of the situation. "Okay, Sum. Calm down. Now, is the fire quenched?"

"Yes. I think so."

"And the oven's turned off?"

Summer swallowed. "Yeah."

"Listen, I'll be right over. And I'll call Ryan to make sure that Seth won't be home for a while. Okay?"

"Okay. Thanks, Coop."

"See you soon."

After putting the phone down Summer took a deep breath; help was on the way. She would fix this; Seth would not walk home to meet a kitchen looking like a big oven with the only thing left piles of ash.

She had planned on doing a nice dinner for him, making him relax after the accident and showing him how much he meant to her. She should have known though that she couldn't make anything on her own.

Fifteen minutes later Marissa barged into the apartment, finding Summer in the smoke filled kitchen. "Summer!"

"The good news is that the smoke is starting to fade. The bad news, dinner is ruined and the whole room is a mess. Oh, and the smell." Summer offered her friend a smile despite the panic welling up inside of her. It felt better not being alone with this mess, but only God knew how embarrassed she was.

Marissa flung her arms around Summer, hugging her tightly. "Sweetie, I'm so glad that you're okay." As they pulled apart Marissa eyed the room. "It looks really bad in here."

The brunette bit her lip. "Yeah. Want to help me figure out what to do?"

Marissa gave her a long hug, again, as to try and make things look better. "I made sure that Seth's gonna be away for a while. We'll clean this up."

"Where do we start?" Summer sighed.

vvvvvvvvv

An hour later the two girls sunk down into two kitchen chairs, exhausted from all the cleaning. They sat there silent for a few minutes. "Are you still up for Wednesday, Sum? I mean, after everything."

Summer tilted her head to look at the other person sitting next to her; she seemed nervous. "Of course, Coop. I won't let you go alone."

Marissa forced a smile and shrugged. "Thanks. It's probably nothing but still,"

"We'll find out whatever it is Wednesday. It'll be okay." Placing a hand on top of her friend's, Summer felt a little better. Maybe everything would work out.

Suddenly though, the front door opened and immediately caused Summer to tense up. Seth was home, already. Things would _not_ be okay now.

He walked through the foyer without either of them being able to stop him; he seemed to be very curious of what was going on. "Hey, guys." He smiled and walked in the direction of Summer when a frown appeared on his forehead. "What's that smell?" There was no way that anyone would have made up a good explanation to that; the smell was too exposing.

Summer felt as if she'd die right there. Fall to the floor and prevent to ever look into his eyes again. The panic welled in her and she could portray how her eyes had filled with tears. "Um,"

"Has there been a fire or something," Seth laughed without noticing Summer's terrified face and walked straight to the kitchen. Marissa first tried to stop him but with the realisation that it was his home and his kitchen she lowered her hand and sunk down in an arm chair. Summer quickly made an exit, fleeing away from him and the huge embarrassment.

"She was making dinner for you, Seth." Marissa sadly said as Seth came back from the kitchen, a shocked expression on his face.

"Oh," Seth understood. He stood there for a moment, probably letting it all sink in. "Will you excuse me?"

The blonde nodded. "Sure, I'll continue with the cleaning." He gave her a thankful look and left the room, in search for Summer who'd run in the direction of the bedroom.

"Summer?" Seth cursed to himself as he found the locked master bathroom door. Placing his ear against the brown smooth surface, again checking the handle, Seth heard nothing. Silence was all that met his ear. Sighing he walked back to the bed and sat down, hoping for the best; that she would open the door.

He still had no idea of exactly what had happened; he hadn't waited for Marissa to explain. But he could pretty much put two and two together; the unexpected call from Marissa Cooper saying that he couldn't come home for a while and Summer's promise to cook for him was all pretty convincing. He'd actually expected to come home to a loving welcome with dinner set for two. But now he understood that all Marissa had wanted was to buy some time; some time for Summer to calm down and them to clean up. Which probably had been more difficult than they'd thought. How else could the kitchen look like it did?

_She better come out from there soon. _

As five minutes passed, with no sound, Seth started to freak out. What was she doing in there? Maybe this whole giving her space and letting her come to him didn't work that well. Maybe he should go check, just to see that she was alright. He wasn't mad or anything, about the kitchen. Was she afraid that he'd be mad? He couldn't, Seth could never be mad at Summer. He didn't care about the kitchen. You could always redecorate it. He was happy and relieved that Summer wasn't hurt, because you could not replace her.

_Please come out. Come out and sit next to me, let me tell you that it's alright. _

His foot shook impatiently, his fingers getting all sweaty. She shouldn't be scared of him, or hide. Not that he knew that she was, maybe she was taking a shower or something. Her hair probably smelled like smoke. But no, there was no sound, no shower. And she couldn't be doing anything else in there but hide. Why did he worry so much about her? All the time. She was probably fine.

_Oh, fuck it. _

Seth carefully knocked. She didn't open, nor tell him to walk away. There was just nothing. The same silence and the same pain in his stomach. "Summer?" he swallowed, silently begging for her to reply. "Please open the door, Sum."

After a few seconds, a click was heard, and Seth opened the door. Summer stood by the sink, looking at the floor. No traces of tears were seen and no evidence of her having done anything else but stood just like she stood now by the sink. Her silence and distant eyes said enough though; she was not alright.

_Let me hold you and make you okay. Let me know that you'll be fine. _

There were no words uttered. Seth walked closer to her and pulled her limb body into his chest, pushing her head under his chin and forcing her arms to go around him. She was like an unconscious body though, just falling against him, her hair covering her face. Seth stroked it away with his healthy hand and if he could, he would have lifted her up into his arms. His arm was broken, but he desperately wished that it wasn't.

He pulled her with him out of the bathroom, into their bedroom where he sat them down on the bed. Summer sat up, close to him, and pulled her thick hair behind her ears. Then she sighed and placed her hands in her lap.

"Let me in," he said almost in a whisper.

And that was, apparently, all it took for Summer to break. First, her shoulders began to tremble and her hands went to cover her face. Then she breathed out a muffled sob in her tiny hands, fallowed by another. "I hate it," she cried and fell backwards onto the bed. She rolled around to her stomach and buried her head in the comforter.

"What do you hate?"

Her voice was so low that he had to concentrate to hear what she said and when she said it he almost wished that he hadn't heard. "Me." That word caused tears to form in his eyes, almost spilling over. He wanted to take it away, and make her the happiest person on this earth. God knew that she deserved it.

She abruptly sat up, her face red and glossy from the crying. "I hate everything!" This time her voice was loud, screaming and desperate. "I fucking hate myself! How come I can't be happy? How come every time I tend to think I'm actually happy something happens?"

Seth watched her, devastated, as she paused to let the hiccups out. She cried heavier than he'd ever seen her cry before. And it was awful.

"I can't-" she sobbed, "I can't do this anymore, Seth."

Horror filled Seth's face as she finished. She could not mean what he thought she was. She couldn't. He shook his head and felt how a tear rolled down his cheek. "Don't talk like that."

Sniffling and wiping her nose with the sleeve of her shirt, Summer continued to sob. "I'm sorry, Seth. But it's too hard. I'm not strong enough for life. It's slowly killing me."

"You don't know what you're saying. I love you! You can't talk like this, Summer."

"Maybe you weren't supposed to stop me that night. It would have been better for both of us if I'd ended it."

"Stop! Summer, I _love_ you." Seth was crying now, huge sobs racking his body.

In a look of desperation Summer pulled a hand through her hair. "I hate that I hurt you. I always hurt you. But I don't want to. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I don't want you to cry."

"Then stop saying that you want to die. Say that you want to live and be with me!"

"I do! I want to but I can't. I want to so bad."

"So stop thinking like that, Summer."

"I can't! Please, I can't." She started to get up, hysterically crying and almost screaming out in frustration. Seth pulled her down though, grabbing her waist and forcing her to lie down next to him. He cried into her hair, tightly holding her against him and hugging her shaking body. "Cohen," she breathed out and gripped his shirt, wanting him to hold her closer than anyone possibly could. She wanted him to take it all away with his love, to let her inner demons die out of love.

_**Please leave a short review, and I'll write more.**_


	22. Chapter 22

**The finale put me into SS mood, so I finished the chapter. :) **

**If you haven't already, check out my new story _Authentic Emotions_.**

Seth woke up with the feeling of something being different; like during the night something big had changed. He was still in the clothes he wore the day before and felt a shard pain in his arm. Something heavy was lying on it while his other, the broken one, was carefully wrapped around someone's waist. Summer's.

A flash of memories from the previous night returned to Seth; causing him to pull the female even closer. She was still asleep, breathing softly onto his neck and having her arms around his torso. He wished that she'd always be like this; stay calm and peaceful. Fear rushed through his body as he remembered what she'd said.

_"Maybe you weren't supposed to stop me that night. It would have been better for both of us if I'd ended it." _

After what had happened there was no way that he'd ever let her go; they were just too close, too attached. Seth didn't really believe in God or any other of that religious things but right now, it seemed like that talk he'd always heard about the purpose in life was making sense. Because now, he felt that there was nothing else that was as important. He would make Summer okay; despite what she said. And deep down he knew that she wanted his help; no one wanted to disappear from life for real. He was certain of this, because he'd seen how Summer was when she was happy. She could smile and laugh and he knew that she did enjoy having friends again. Something inside, maybe very hidden, would always want to live. Seth would bring that to Summer's eyes and make her see how she did not want to miss out of life.

The fact that she was so devastated and sad inside always made his heart break into thousands of pieces, but to have her close and okay was enough to hold it together.

Summer began to stir inside of his embrace, softly rubbing her face into his shirt. Seth kissed her temple and waited for her to orderly wake up. She made a weird sound, a mixture of a yawn and a moan, and kept her head pushed against his chest. He could feel that her eyes were open and could pretty much guess that she was waiting for him to start saying something; because she wouldn't.

"Morning," he spoke, his voice raspy from the sleep. He cleared his throat and noticed how sore it was; possibly from the crying. Seth wondered how she was feeling; maybe the same. Or worse.

Her soft voice was heard, almost in a whisper, "Hi."

They stayed like that, arms wrapped around each other, for a long time. Several minutes went by and for a moment, Seth thought that he'd actually fall asleep again. But at that moment Summer moved his arms away, careful with his injured one, and sat up. "How's your arm?"

"Oh," Seth said, a little startled. "It's fine." That was sort of a lie, it did hurt; probably because of his sleeping position. But that wasn't important now. "How are you," he carefully asked while shyly meeting her gaze.

Summer nervously shifted on the bed. "Oh, you know…better."

"Good." He sat up next to her and brought her hand into his. "I'm glad." She gave him a small smile before looking down, afraid to let him see her eyes that were starting to tear up. "You want to do something today? We could go to this new exhibition and maybe dress up and go for dinner later?"

Summer kept her head bowed. "Sure."

He knew that they had to talk; they could not continue things like before or act like nothing had happened. Therefore Seth decided to do it now; there was no point in waiting. "Summer," he decisively said and squeezed her hand. She looked up, with this uncertain and insecure look she sometimes had. "I love you. You know that, right?"

"I know," she said and tucked some hair behind her ear. He could tell that she was uncomfortable.

Seth continued. "And you know that if you love someone, you want what's best for them? You want them to be happy." She nodded and lowered her gaze to the bed sheets. "I want all that for you. And nothing else matters to me; other than your happiness. Okay?" He so desperately wanted her to understand, that he'd do anything for her. She had to know how amazing and loved she was. "I love you so much, Summer."

Summer wrapped her small arms around his neck, burying her head under his chin while he drew small patterns on her back. She knew that she'd never really get used to hear those words; they meant more than she'd ever be able to explain. Everything about Seth was like nothing she'd ever had before. He was the kindest and most caring person she knew and he was more than she'd ever thought existed. How could he care so much about her? She'd never understand.

Having his arms around her made her feel so safe and a hundred times better. It made everything else disappear; it made her world in colour again. "You're so amazing, Cohen." She pulled away and gave him a soft kiss. "I'm sorry about everything."

"I don't want you to be sorry."

"But I am. Your kitchen-"

Seth placed a finger on her lips, as to silence her. "Will be redecorated. And you can help me, if you want." Seth smiled and showed her that he wasn't sad at all about the kitchen; truthfully he wasn't. And now he had a project together with Summer; something they could do together. "You must be hungry." Seth stood up, expecting her to join him. "Maybe we can go out for breakfast."

She shifted on the bed, pulling one of her legs under the other. "Could we just stay here?" Summer gestured to the bed. "I don't feel like going out today. Not now anyway. Is that okay?"

"Of course. We'll stay here." Seth smiled brightly; glad that she'd told him what she wanted to do and not just let him decide.

vvvvvvvvv

Summer couldn't help but smile as she peeked into the living room where Seth seemed to be preparing a tray of food for them. He carefully placed everything on the tray, thoroughly choosing the items. As he was done a problem seemed to have appeared; he scratched his cheek and glanced down at the tray.

"Need any help with that food?" Summer asked and walked out from the bedroom, a small smile lying on her lips.

He shrugged, revealing a grin. "This arm causes more problems than I thought."

"I better help you then. You keep that arm safe," Summer said, picking up the tray. She led the way to the bedroom where she put it down on the bed. They both sat down on each side and fell into silence.

Their eyes locked and for a moment Summer felt really bad. Gazing into those brown eyes made her realize again just how amazing he was. Any girl who got him would be the luckiest in the entire world. And somewhere there had to be someone that was just the same for him. That someone he would feel good when being together with and someone who could let him complain about his own problems once in a while. Seth should be with a person who deserved him and who made him happy.

Summer needed him to understand; she needed to make him get that what she wanted wasn't what she could have. But it was hard; harder than anything else. She was determined though, to have this out and to explain.

Biting her lip, she spoke. "Cohen?"

"Yeah."

"I need to talk to you." She had never been this nervous and certain at the same time before. "About yesterday." Seth had not expected Summer to be the one to talk, without him pushing her to. Therefore he didn't say anything; he wanted to make sure not to interrupt her. "I want you to know that I'm forever grateful for the things you've done for me and how sweet you are to me. And, about that night-" She stopped right there, closing her eyes and trying to gather herself enough to continue. "I told you that I wished that you hadn't come. And that's not true. I'm so glad that I've met you."

A tear rolled down her pale cheek, causing her to embarrassingly laugh and wipe it away. "I just guess that sometimes, I feel like I've put you through so many bad things and I only hurt you. Like I can't give you anything but problems. That's when I wish that we hadn't met. For you." Her last words came out in a whisper and she desperately tried not to cry; wanting to say so much more.

"Summer-"

"Please don't say anything. Not yet." Summer swallowed. "I can't go on like this; constantly feeling like this. I need to do something about it."

Seth uncomfortably shifted on the bed, fearing what was to come out of this conversation. "What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that I need to see my father."

"Oh," Seth said, a little surprised. "That's…good."

"I really don't want to, but I need to try," she quickly added in an attempt to make him realize that this wasn't going to be easy.

"And?" Seth asked, noticing that she was holding something back. Truthfully he was even more nervous now, after she'd dropped the first bomb. Something in her eyes made him expect worse things to come.

Summer fumbled with her hands, hating this moment before she spoke. She just wanted it over with. Taking a deep breath and straightening up, she finally started to talk again. "Well, I don't expect you to be with me. I'd rather do it on my own. And let you do all the things you've missed because of me." She uncertainly looked at him, hoping that he had heard what she said despite the quick speed of her words. "I can find a new place."

"No," he simply said.

She questionably searched his face. "No?"

"That's right. I told you that I'd be by your side, that I'd help you through this. And I will."

Summer had never seen someone as determined as Seth seemed to be; he was talking like it was the most obvious thing in the world and like he had all the power to definite the decision. This didn't really come as a surprise for Summer, she knew that he wouldn't let her go easily. Secretly, she was hoping for his reaction to be like this. She wanted him to be upset, and to force her not to exclude him from everything. But still, she needed to be sure. She needed to give him a chance to let her go in case that was what he wanted. Therefore she tried not to show any sigh of happiness. "I know you want to, Seth, but really, I think I need to do this myself."

He seemed very stubborn though, calmly taking her hand in his while staring into her eyes. "Then you can. I won't force you to do anything else. But do not shut me out of your life. Stay here with me. We'll solve this together."

Talking someone this understanding and adorable out of this was not easy. In a last attempt she whispered, "I just want to give you a chance to get out of this."

Sincerely staring into her eyes Seth said, "I don't want out, Summer. What do I need to do to prove that to you?"

"Really?"

"Yes. You're what's important to me."

Summer smiled, small tears forming in her eyes. "Hug me?"

Seth immediately wrapped her in a hug lasting for several minutes, slightly rocking her. "Anything for you."


	23. Chapter 23

Hello everyone.

I am aware of the fact that I haven't been updating in forever and also about the fact that many of you are waiting for a new chapter. I have my reasons for not writing right now though, and I hope that you all can accept that. I am sincerely sorry for this, because I would want to write. Personal issues can stand in the way of many things, and for me writing is just one of them.

Please be patient, for I will update. Just not for a while.

-June


	24. Chapter 24

**Hello everyone! I am back with this story. :)**

**Enjoy and please let me know if you still like it.**

Summer took a look at herself in the mirror. She wore jeans and a green blouse and had her hair loose around her shoulders. "Seth?" she called as she put on some lipstick. "Are you coming?"

_"Summer, I really appreciate that you came with me here. I don't want Ryan to worry and-" _

_"Hey, it's okay. You don't have to explain," Summer said as she sat wíth Marissa in the doctor's office. "Besides, it's the least I can do." _

_Marissa gave her a small smile. It was obvious that she was nervous and a bit worried. As she didn't say anything in respond Summer gently placed her hand on top of her friend's and waited with her. _

_"Ms. Cooper," a kind-looking woman said and walked up to the twosome. "We're ready for you." She gave Marissa a smile as the tall woman weakly stood up, looking at Summer. "Your friend can come, too." _

_Relieved Marissa took Summer's hand and squeezed it. _

Seth appeared from the bedroom, also dressed in jeans and a light blue striped shirt. "Coming," he said as he walked up to the petite woman, putting both of his hands around her waist making her turn around. "You're looking great." He smiled and leaned in to kiss her lips but Summer pushed her head to the side and made his lips touch her cheek instead. "Hey," Seth said with disappointment evident in his voice.

"Look, I've just put this on. Don't ruin it," she said referring to the lipstick.

Seth pouted. "So? You can just put some more on."

Summer smiled and took his hand, giggling as he tried his best to create puppy-dog eyes. "Let's go."

"Summer," Seth whined and fallowed her as she dragged him out of the apartment, locking the door behind them.

They were going to the Cohens' house to have dinner. This time Ryan and Marissa wouldn't be there. It would just be the four of them. And to Seth's delight Summer was having a good day. She was having a good week. He smiled as he thought of how she had coped these past weeks and couldn't be happier that she was as happy as she was. He had expected the father issue to be a big step backwards but to his surprise it hadn't. Summer had been going to her therapist on a regular basis and really begun to relax about the whole situation; she'd grown to trust Christie.

"What are you smiling about," Summer asked mischievously, raising her eyebrows, watching him as they walked side by side.

Smiling down at her Seth brought her hand up to his lips. "You," he simply said and gently kissed her knuckles.

"You're so cheesy sometimes, Cohen," Summer laughed but he could tell that she was enjoying it.

"Is that a problem for you," Seth flirted, brushing her fingers with his tongue.

"No," Summer said and blushed, leaning a few inches closer to him. He continued to place kisses all over her hand as they quietly made their way to the car. Summer didn't make him stop even though she usually didn't like to do more than hold hands in public. And she figured that it probably looked quite harmless to everyone else, Seth sweetly placing kisses over her fingers. To her though it only made her want to kiss him even more.

When they got to his car in the garage Summer let go of his hand and pushed him against the car door, passionately kissing him. Her arms made their way around his neck, her fingers finding their way to his curls as she made him moan into her mouth. He kissed her back immediately, pulling her closer to him by her waist.

Just as abruptly as she'd pulled him to her she pulled away, smiling up at him as he stood there with his mouth half open, his lips swollen and more colourful than usual. "What," he innocently asked as he gently pulled her to him again, leaning in for another kiss. Summer let herself be kissed and felt how she relaxed in his arms. They stood there, Seth holding her waist and Summer massaging his arms, and shared a few more kisses before they both pulled apart just the slightest. "See, you can just put some more lipstick on after we've finished," Seth quietly said and captured her lips one more time.

"Well, you should see your face. I had a reason not to kiss you, you know." Summer giggled as Seth leaned down to check his reflection in the mirror of the car.

Seth tried to smear the lipstick off of his face. "Better?" he asked and looked at Summer for a respond.

She grinned and pulled a tissue out from her purse. "Let me help you." Summer gently wiped the pink from around Seth's mouth and lips. "There," she smiled and pulled out a mirror from her purse to fix her own face. "Now, we should go. We don't want to be late."

vvvvvvvvv

Seth pulled the car up on the Cohen driveway and turned the engine off. They clasped hands before walking up the front steps, Seth giving Summer a comforting smile as they rang the bell. Summer squeezed his hand in reply and was actually looking forward to meet his parents. They were the nicest people she'd ever met. He did have a wonderful family. When she'd first met them she'd been worried that she wouldn't fit in. They were really rich and not at all like any people she'd ever been friends with. But Sandy and Kirsten Cohen had surprised her, like their son had. They were funny and she felt very comfortable around them somehow.

Kirsten was the one to open the door. "Hi," she smiled and pulled Seth into a hug first and then turned to Summer. "Hi, Summer. It's so good to see you both." Summer placed her arms around the older woman's chest and smiled. She wished that she could have had a mother like Seth's.

"It's good to see you, too," Summer said as they pulled apart. Sandy emerged almost immediately and lifted his eyebrows, smiling widely.

"Summer," he exclaimed and kissed her cheek while giving her a light hug. "It's great to see you. I must say, you are looking good. Who knew my son would find himself a beauty like yourself." Summer giggled, locking eyes with Kirsten who rolled her eyes at her husband.

"Dad," Seth yelled. "I'm hurt."

"Oh, come on son, don't be a baby." Sandy said, giving him a light punch in the back. "It's good to see you, too."

Seth looked defeated but then turned to Summer who stood there looking cute, her fingers playing with a strand of dark hair. "Yeah, yeah. She is beautiful so I guess I kinda get your point."

Summer gave him an eyeroll but was slightly touched inside. It still felt strange to be called that. Beautiful. Even though Seth had said it many times she still wasn't used to it. It was even more strange to have his dad call her a beauty. Somehow though, she liked it. For once she didn't want to flee as she got the attention.

Seth smiled at her for the hundredth time that day and lightly pecked her cheek.

"So, Ryan and Marissa didn't say what they were up to today but they couldn't be here. So it's just gonna be the four of us," Kirsten said as they walked into the kitchen.

_"I can't believe this," Marissa quietly said, obviously still in shock. "I didn't plan this." _

_Summer gently rubbed her friend's upper arm. "Hey, it'll be fine. Ryan will be there for you. You guys love each other." _

_"Yeah, but we didn't plan this. How do I tell him?" Summer could see the panic well up in her friend. She knew that this was a big shock, nothing the both of them had planned to happen just yet._

_"Marissa, he has to know. You're in this together. It's his baby too." _

_The taller girl gasped as she uttered those last words. Baby. "It really is a baby." _

_"Yeah," Summer said and smiled._

Summer hadn't told Seth. She wanted to but had promised Marissa and she knew that Ryan would have to be the first to find out. That was what this getaway was all about. Marissa would tell him. Or at least she was supposed to.

Having a girlfriend like Marissa was amazing. Summer had never really been close to anybody, boy or girl. And now she had both Seth, who was wonderful, and Marissa. To top that Seth's whole family had welcomed her warmly. Summer had gone from having no friends, a job she hated and a crappy apartment to be surrounded by good friends and staying in a beautiful apartment together with Seth. Life had taken a turn, a good turn.

"So, Summer," Sandy said as they sat by the table in the backyard eating the delicious meal that Kirsten had cooked. "Are you joining us for Chrismukkah?"

Summer nervously glanced at Seth, a frown in her forehead. "Chrismukkah?"

"Seth, you've told her, right?" Kirsten said as Seth laughed while shaking his head.

"Told me what," Summer asked confused. The three others around the table were smiling and Seth seemed to be the one who got to do the explaining.

He grinned before beginning. "When I was six I came up with Chrismukkah, a holiday combining Christmas and Hanukkah, Christianity and Judaism. I came up with Chrismukkah, this super holiday."

"Chrismukkah, huh?" Summer giggled. "He came up with it," she asked and looked to Sandy and Kirsten.

They nodded. "He did. And we've kind of embraced it."

Seth grinned. Chrismukkah was one of the things Seth really felt proud of. And with Summer he was sure that it would be the best Chrismukkah _ever_. "You just wait 'til you've witnessed the magic of Chrismukkah. It's gonna be awesome!"

Summer smiled and could tell that this was something Seth was really excited about. To her though, holidays had never been very great. More of the opposite. She'd always loved watching Christmas movies and listen to Christmas carols but at the end of the day she would always be disappointed. Because Christmas and Santa never came to the Roberts. Summer flinched a little as the memories came to her.

"Are you alright, Sum?" Seth asked and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. He looked at her with a mixture of concern and hope in his eyes.

Summer brushed her thought aside. It could be different this year. Seth had kept proving to her that she could change her life and if she just trusted him then maybe Christmas could turn out well. "You really want me to come?"

"Of course we do, Summer," Kirsten said in a loving voice. She was afraid to ask anything about Summer's family or if she had other plans. "It would be really nice to have another girl in the family. No offense, boys," she quickly said and turned to her husband and son. Kirsten was used to be surrounded by boys, buying gifts for them and also receiving gifts from them, but it _would_ be nice to have a girl around. Of course Marissa had been around for the last couple of years and she loved that, but Marissa had her own family and had always had to hurry back to her mom's or her dad's. Marissa was part of the family but somehow this girl that Seth had found was different. She fitted in this family even if she couldn't see it herself just yet.

"Thank you," Summer said in an emotional voice, unaware of the tear that had slipped down her cheek. "I'd love to come." Seth lovingly brushed her tear away and grabbed her hand, squeezing it slightly to let her know that he was there and that everything was okay.

"Then it's settled." Sandy put his hands together and started to clear the table. "Honey, will you help me with the dessert?"

Kirsten quickly rose and the twosome went inside, leaving another twosome by the table.

Seth took both of Summer hands in his and played with them in his lap, admiring how small and perfect they were in his. Shifting on her chair Summer moved closer to Seth, making their knees touch. "Seth, I-" she started but as he lifted his head she hesitated. He didn't say anything though, just waited for her to continue while gently massaging her hands. "You can't leave me. Ever."

Looking straight into her teary eyes Seth spoke. "I won't. Really." He was surprised himself of how much love he had for her. "I love you, Summer. And I want to be with you."

Summer gave him a smile and took one of his hands into hers, bringing it up to her face. She softly kissed his palm. Seth had her wrapped around his finger in a way. Everyhting he said made her heart melt and she was actually believing that he meant every word. He hadn't disappointed her once. "You know what?"

"What?" Seth looked at her curiously, waiting for her answer.

Summer kept smiling and as she let go of his hand and leaned her head closer to his, she whispered, "I love you, too."

**I hope you liked it! Please leave a short review and if you have any suggestions let me know. Also, I have not forgotten about Summer's dad...**


	25. Chapter 25

"Summer, guess what?" Seth exclaimed as he landed on the sofa next to her. She quickly put the magazine down and searched his face. The wide smile reassured her that it was indeed good news.

"What?"

As if to catch his breath - since he was in ecstasy it seemed and had sprinted to the sofa – he waited a few seconds before he began his rambling. "Ryan called me and told me that Marissa had told him that she is expecting a baby. I'm gonna be an Uncle. Mom and dad will be grandparents. Isn't it amazing?"

Summer couldn't do anything but smile. He was genuinely happy and that was beyond sweet. "It is amazing."

"We are really grown up. I wonder if they will get married," Seth continued as he made himself comfortable on the sofa, unconsciously placing an arms over Summer's shoulders. "I mean if they are getting a baby they must be pretty sure they want to be with each other."

Nodding, she calmly replied, "Yeah, a baby is a big deal."

"Did Marissa call you?" Turning his head slightly he captured her gaze. "You don't seem surprised. Heck, even Ryan was surprised."

Summer gave him a guilty smile. She had been dying to know how Ryan would take the news. Her friend had been so scared that he wouldn't be happy since they hadn't planned to have a baby just yet. "I kind of already knew. Before Ryan even," Summer carefully said.

"I knew it!" Seth laughed, still completely overwhelmed by the fact that he was to become an uncle. "Does Ryan know that? Well, never mind. What do you think?"

Summer giggled, and relaxed against his arm. "I think it's great. I haven't really known anyone who got a baby before so it's exciting. I wonder if it's a boy or a girl, and what they will name the baby." That was true. None of her friends had ever had a baby before, not that she'd had many friends. And secretly Summer had always loved babies. Just thinking about how a person could grow inside another being was just too amazing. Like a miracle.

Seth smiled, noticing her choice of words. She wanted to know this baby. She wanted to stay in his life. Their first months together had been focused on Summer and all he could think about was to make her feel better. He wanted her to be happy more than anything. And now, some months into their relationship, Seth had started thinking about a future with Summer. He had never felt this way about anyone before, and although he had rushed into relationships in the past - which obviously was not good for him – he really felt like what he had with Summer was special. He wanted to be with her, and he wanted it to last and be _it_.

Summer turned to look at Seth, wondering what he was thinking of while unconsciously stroking her arm. "Do you want to have children," he finally said.

His question took her by surprise but he didn't seem to notice. He still seemed to have his head up in the clouds about Ryan and Marissa's baby, his niece or nephew. That was true, he was thinking about that specific baby. But he was also imagining what it would be like for his niece or nephew to have a cousin, possibly a little girl with brown hair and big dark eyes. Summer thought for a second before replying. "Um, I don't know. I guess."

"Summer, you would be the best mom. And the kids would be beautiful."

A giggle slipped out of her mouth and she smiled. Seth had an amazing gift to make her comfortable in all situations. "Well, do you want to be a dad?"

"Me? A dad? Sounds so weird. I'm glad Ryan's doing this first." He paused, turning more serious. "But I want to, someday." _With you _he added in his head.

"I bet your parents are thrilled," Summer said and leaned in closer to Seth's side.

Wrapping her in closer to his chest Seth placed a loving kiss on her temple. "I bet."

"Was Ryan happy?"

"Yeah. Happy but surprised I think."

"Marissa was so nervous about telling him."

"It wasn't planned?"

"No, except don't tell anyone I told you that."

"I won't," he said reassuringly, moving his face to her so that he could place kisses all over her neck. She let out another giggle as he kind of tickled her with his breathing, and pulled his lips up to meet hers. Softly pressing hers against his, she felt completely content and in love.

vvvvvvvvv

"Seth?"

Summer stepped out of the darkness, silently walking up to where he stood newly showered. His hair was still wet and the skin was still warm from the steams of the water. The shirt he was wearing was slightly damp and he was still holding the towel. "Yeah?"

Summer eyed him for a few moments, taking his features in. He looked so adorable and it made her heart feel all warm. Walking up to him, as he was drying his hair seemingly unaware of her gaze on him, she took the towel away from him. Finally looking into her eyes, Seth noticed the different look in those beautiful eyes. She was looking at him with so much emotion, that he felt slightly confused. "Everything okay," he asked.

Smiling Summer nodded, reassuring him that everything was indeed good. She knew that he cared so much about her, hence all the concerned questions about how she was feeling all the time. So many times there was something to be concerned about, and she loved Seth for always making sure. This time though, nothing was wrong. Everything was good. So good. "Everything's perfect," Summer whispered in his ear before kissing him.

Did he know how good he made her feel? How good _they_ made her feel? With an overwhelming need to let him know, let him feel, exactly how good she felt, Summer deepened the kiss. She brought her arms into his damp hair, letting the towel fall to the flood. Kissing him always felt perfect, it had since that first kiss a few months ago. It was as if she was meant to be there with him, this close, as if she had found her safe harbor.

Seth was quick to answer her eager touch, intensifying the kisses and letting his hands find their way up her shirt. Her soft skin made him want to touch her all over, and she pulled away from his lips just enough to let him take her shirt off breathing heavily and quickly connecting her lips to his warm ones again.

As they made their way back into the bathroom, where Seth had just taken a shower, more clothes were thrown to the floor and the water was again turned on.

vvvvvvvvv

"Hello? Seth? " Kirsten Cohen walked into her son's apartment, after having knocked a few times and noticed that the door was unlocked. Seeing that no one was there she placed the clothes she'd picked up from the dry- cleaning on the sofa. "Are you home, Seth?"

The blonde was about to pick up her phone and call her son, letting him know that he had forgotten to lock his front door and that it was not okay even if he lived in what seemed a very safe house, when a noise interrupted her.

Summer appeared from the bedroom, wearing a robe and carelessly putting her wet hair in a loose bump on her head. She was surprised to see that there stood a woman in the middle of Seth's living room. Seth's mother to be specific. "Mrs. Cohen," she nervously blurted out, knowing exactly what she and Seth had been doing just minutes ago.

"Oh, hi, Summer!" Kirsten also seemed quite nervous and out of place. She had a smile on her face though. "I was just going to return some things from the dry-cleaning, and the door wasn't locked." She nervously played with her fingers. "I didn't think there was anyone here."

Summer carefully put her robe closer around her body, making sure she looked as responsible as possible. "Oh, yeah, I was in the shower and Seth-"

"Summer, where did you," Seth half said half yelled as he came from the bedroom, only to notice that his mother stood in the living room. "Go," he quietly finished his sentence. "Mom, I didn't hear you come."

"Well, Seth, I let myself in. Since I knocked and no one answered. I was just returning your clothes from dry-cleaning." Kirsten smiled as she explained herself for the second time, sensing the awkwardness of the situation.

"I was in the shower, I didn't hear you. Sorry." Seth scratched his head, completely unaware of the fact that Summer had just told Kirsten that she had been in the shower. Summer, knowing Seth didn't notice the awkwardness, felt her face heat up and she blushed. She didn't dare look at Kirsten, who probably could put two and two together.

And Summer was right, as Kirsten spoke again. "I can see that," she started referring to Seth's wet hair. "I was just in the neighborhood, so figured I'll bring you this." She motioned for the clothes on the sofa.

"Thanks, mom. Do you want to stay? I can put on some coffee," Seth suggested with a smile to both women.

"Thank you, Seth. But I should get home to your father." Kirsten excused herself, glad that her son at least offered. "Speaking of your father. He wanted me to ask you, if you have those shoes he lent you?"

"Yeah, I'll get them." Seth left the room, going to the bedroom again.

Summer stood there a little awkward, and forced herself to look at her boyfriend's mother. Kirsten seemed to do the same, only she seemed a lot calmer. With a smile she spoke. "Sorry about the intrusion. I guess I'm not used to Seth having-"

Summer quickly interrupted, afraid of what Kirsten was actually going to say out loud. "It's okay. No worries." Both women smiled, Summer blushing as she realized that her quick interruption just made what had been going on with Seth and her so much more obvious.

Kirsten had always liked the fact that the Cohen family, her family, was open with each other. Sandy had had that influence on her, always talking about things which she had been raised not to talk about. Sandy had insisted that they'd raise Seth the same, with things better being talked about rather than to be left with an awkward and silent understanding about. So she decided that she'd better do what she had learned to live by, breaking the uncomfortable silence between herself and the younger woman. "Summer, I am well aware of the fact that my son is intimate with his girlfriend. And I am glad that his girlfriend is you."

Summer nervously let a small laugh out from her mouth. She definitely had not expected Kirsten to react in this way, having practically walked in on her son having sex in the shower. She blushed for the millionth time. "Thank you. I am glad to be his girlfriend." It actually felt relieving that Kirsten was okay with it all, and acted to calm and natural. It made herself relax as well. "Seth really is an amazing guy."

"Yes, he is."

"Found them!" Seth appeared from the bedroom with a pair of shoes in his hands. Again, he was unaware of the changed atmosphere in the room and both women smiling and looking at him with love. "Tell dad thanks for the loan."

"I will." Kirsten accepted the shoes and turned for the door, after giving Summer a loving smile. "It was good seeing you, both."

"You too, mom." Seth kissed her cheek and followed her to the door.

"Bye, Mrs. Cohen. I hope I will see you again soon," Summer happily said. Seth's mom was really great.

Just as the door closed after Kirsten Summer flopped down on one of the sofa's, releasing a big sigh. "You know your mother totally knew we just had sex, Cohen."

"What? No she didn't. Not necessarily."

"Not only did she tell me, but when both of us are wet and saying we've just taken a shower I think it's quite obvious we've been in the shower together. And two people don't take a shower together if it's not something sexual. Don't you think?"

Summer laughed as she saw Seth's face change as he realized what had just happened, with him completely naïve and unknowing. He leaped down next to her on the sofa. "I should have known that. My mother knows _everything_. She's a very wise woman"

Giggling, Summer placed herself half on top of Seth, gazing into his eyes with a blushing smile. "I am actually okay with it, even though it's totally embarrassing. I like your mom."

"That's good. Because you'd better get used to it. My parents can be a little embarrassing."

"You really have a great family, Seth. They really love you." Summer turned more serious and rested her head against his chest, enjoying the now familiar position for her and the way that his arms immediately wrapped themselves around her.

"Yeah. You know, they love you too." Seth kissed her hair, softly talking to her. "I love you, Summer."

Summer smiled, both feeling and believing that those words were actually true. Something she had not been able to in the beginning. Love was a big word. "I love you, too."

Nothing could sound as beautiful to Seth but Summer uttering those words. He knew what she had been through; he knew that whatever hard time he had in his childhood with bullying wasn't as awful as growing up not being loved by anyone. At least he had had his family, and then Ryan. Summer had been alone and it ached in him just thinking about how she had been hurt in her life. It was not just the young Summer who had been hurt, it had followed her her whole life and she still had her scars and probably always would.

Seth tightened his hold of the petite brunette, the emotions making his eyes tear up. Summer didn't notice though, but buried her face into his neck, wanting to be even closer to him, as if to let him know that whatever he felt she felt too.

"You deserve so much, Summer. So much more than you ever can know." To those words it was Summer's turn to tear up. Never in her wildest dreams had she dreamt of this, lying in the arms of an amazing man whom she loved and who loved her back. He made her feel all kinds of feeling, and all of them were good. He seemed to love her no matter what he found out or no matter what she did or what feelings she had. He never gave up on her. And he made her not give up on herself either. He made her stronger and most of all, he made her happy.

"God, I love you," Summer whispered. He made her believe that what she had been feeling for so long was not the way she was supposed to live life. He made her feel safe and he made her brave. And deep down Summer knew that Seth could never do anything to hurt her. He was a good person. He was the kind of person she wanted to always be with, and he made her secretly dream of getting married, having kids and growing old together.

vvvvvvvvv

Later that night both of them lay in bed, Seth breathing into Summer's hair as he slept hugging her to him. Summer was wide awake though, content with the fact and comfortable just laying there in the dark, thinking.

The last couple of months had changed her. She almost felt like the time before she had met Seth was another life, and her life had changed so much. All to the better.

Before, just thinking about her childhood and her parents had made her cry. It did still hurt whenever she remembered but she had come to see things with a new perspective. She could see that it had not been her fault, and that her parents had had their own problems and she had just come between them. Summer could feel for that little child, the younger Summer, and almost comfort her in her mind. She had come to grow a love for that child, replacing the shame and hate she had been feeling for such a long time. And now, she wanted to give that little girl all that she deserved. She wanted to give that little girl a bright future, to take responsibility for those things not stopping her from healing and becoming a happy person.

Summer wanted to rise above all what she had been through, and use her experience to do good. She wanted to do what Seth had done for her; give other people hope. She wanted them to know that there were good people in the world and that they were not useless and worthless but important and worthy. No matter what they had heard in their life, no matter what they had been through.

For some time Summer has also been thinking more about her relationship – or lack of – with her father. She had decided that she would try to contact him, even if it just meant closure. She was not expecting him to be open to explain why he had left her, but she at least wanted to do everything she could to find out. Of this, Christy and Seth had been very supportive. And even though she knew that there was a big chance that she was going to get turned down by her father, she felt strong enough to not let that hurt her too much. She felt content about what she now had in her life, and the people in it. Seth and his family, Marissa. They were good people and a good start to her new life. She had not had a family for a very long time, and was used to that. So therefore, she did not need her father to come back into her life.

Summer smiled to herself as she lay there in the darkness, feeling safe and loved in the arms of Seth. If there was a God, she was grateful that He had sent Seth to her that day several months ago when she had wanted to jump off that pier. And she was glad and proud of herself for letting Seth in, because it had changed her life.

**The story is coming to an end...**


	26. Chapter 26

The story has come to an end and this is the finale chapter of the story. It is sort of an epilogue and turned out to be quite long. Hope you like it! I could have chosen to continue with the story, but decided that it's better to finish it now that I'm writing again rather than losing my inspiration once again and leaving it unfinished. Because I just hate it every time I read a good story that's not finished. So, story complete people.

I have loved writing this story and I'm very glad to be able to finish it (even though it's taken a few years). Thank you everyone who have reviewed and followed this story throughout the years! Your reviews have been encouraging and I have loved the good response. I could not have done this without you. Thank you. 

**Fix Me – Finale chapter**

**Two years later…**

Seth Cohen had a lingering smile on his face as he sat in his car, on his way home from work. There were several reasons of why he was feeling this good and therefore could not stop smiling.

One. It was Friday and he had been able to get out of work early for once; the whole weekend in front of him. Two. He was on his way _home_; not to the old apartment but to their brand new house. Seth had loved the apartment and it had worked really great living there alone. But he had always intended to move, to settle down in a house. And lucky as he was, his mother was in the business and had been able to find him a really good one. View, location, pool and all. Of course Kirsten Cohen had found a house that was quite close to her and Sandy, which Seth actually did not mind. It was not like they were neighbors, but if they wanted or needed to he could be at his parent's house in five to ten short minutes.

The third reason to why he was smiling, and the biggest reason, was that there would be someone waiting for him when he got home. Summer. Their relationship had been going very well the past years and he was falling more in love with her every day. He had never dared to even dream of being this lucky, having a girlfriend like Summer in his life.

Summer. She had been the reason of his happy face for about two years now. His feeling for her had grown to become deep and he did want to spend the rest of his life together with her. They had been really good together these past years. Summer had made him happy again, like happy for real. He loved to have her support, to wake up next to her beautiful face and to plan his time knowing they were two.

And he was so proud of having her by his side. He always had been. She was not only gorgeous and made other guys wish they could be Seth as they walked hand in hand on the street. But over the past couple of years, she had really turned into an incredible woman. She was more comfortable with herself and took care of herself better, mostly psychologically but also physically. Marissa had made Summer come with her to get manicures, and to the hairdresser and to the waxer and they would always do these things together. Seth did not mind of course, even if Summer was beautiful even without all these things.

More importantly though, Summer had also got the courage to actually dream, and aim for those dreams. Summer had let herself be passionate about work, finding a job she cared about and wanted to have. She was helping people and Seth loved seeing her get excited over work. He had encouraged her to get a degree and she had been studying and working these last couple of years, and creating a work she was very good at. She helped kids with problems; kids who reminded herself of her own childhood. She worked at this place where they could come talk, where they could get help with school or where they could just crash when they did not have any other place to go or anyone to turn to.

Cora was a result of the new Summer; the new passionate and dedicated Summer. Cora was fourteen years old and she was living with Seth and Summer at the moment, and had done so for periods over the last couple of weeks.

At first, Seth had been a little skeptic to the idea of having a strange girl come live with them. But Summer had convinced him. And Ryan had convinced him, using himself as a good example of a kid who just needed someone who cared. Of course his father had also convinced him; feeling more proud of himself, his son and Summer than ever before. Seth, of course, had surrendered and Cora moved in. It actually turned out to be great. Seth liked her and enjoyed her company. The three of them would have dinner together and watch a movie. And Seth did not mind, as long as he afterwards could be alone with his girlfriend in their bedroom. In fact, Seth liked Cora; she was like the sister he never had.

At first he had been worried that she would give them problems, not unlike his mother had felt in the beginning when Ryan moved in with them. And he was very keen on keeping the relationship he had with Summer the way it was; awesome. But Cora turned out to be a good kid. She just had a crappy background. And she reminded him of Summer. So he loved having her, and loved seeing Summer help Cora. Sometimes he would just watch the two of them, as they made dinner together or just talked. Summer would call it eavesdropping but Seth had no intensions of listening to details about what they said; he just liked to watch Summer being the way she was; loving and wonderful.

Sometimes, during night, Summer would snuggle close to him. She would bury her face in his neck and whisper in his ear. "Thank you." And her voice would be filled with so much emotion, and sometimes she would shed a tear and sometimes she would smile, depending on which memory she was thinking of. Seth would hug her close, and whisper into her hair that he loved her more than anything.

_"Hey," _

_"Please come to the other side of the railing."_

_No. I'm gonna jump and you can't stop me. No one can._

_"You're freezing."_

_She began to cry._

_"Let me help you." His hand found hers and he took it in his, warming her cold one. "You don't want this."_

_But he squeezed her hand and she let him. Then she nodded._

_"No. Let me buy you some coffee and we can talk."_

_And without realizing it she nodded again._

_"Good. Now let me help you."_

_He turned her around and she lowered her head as to hide her teary face. He gently placed his hand on her chin though and brought it back up. His hand then found her waist and he lifted her over the railing. Her arms automatically went around his neck as to support herself. But as he'd lifted her over the railing she didn't let go. And his arms found their way around her waist, hugging her body._

_He brought her closer and let her cry into his jacket. His fingers lightly stroked her shiny hair, in a way no one had done before._

Seth could not put into words what that memory made him feel. He was just beyond thankful that he had been there that night, that he had seen Summer and stopped her. Because she turned out to be the best thing he had ever had happening to him. And as much as he had saved her, she had saved him as well.

vvvvvvvvv

"Summer," Marissa exclaimed and embraced her friend in a tight hug. It had been a few days since they last saw each other, and that was a long time. Over the last two years the two women had become close friends and they would see each other every other day and speak on the phone every day.

Summer smiled brightly into Marissa's shoulder. "Hi! Where's my little girl," she asked and immediately searched for the baby face she wanted to attack with kisses.

"She's sleeping, in the family room."

"Oh," Summer said with some disappointment obvious in her voice. But that only seemed to last for a few second because she then smiled, saying, "I'll be right back!"

Marissa laughed, seeing the brunette disappearing out of the room. "Just don't wake her up, Sum!"

"She turned you down, huh," a girl's voice said with a smirk.

Marissa turned around and smiled, opening her arms for another greeting. "Cora."

Cora hugged Marissa back and then stood back, pulling some of her long, straight hair behind her ear. Cora was a beautiful teenage girl. She had mahogany brown hair and light skin, and had a beautiful smile. Many boys would chase after her in the future, Marissa thought.

"Hi, sister-in-law," Seth mumbled, making his way over to the two girls.

"Seth!" Marissa gave him a light hug.

"So, where's my god daughter slash niece," Seth simply asked, his hands in his pockets.

"Is no one interested in me these days," Marissa joked but received no answer. "She's in the family room with your girlfriend."

"Thanks," Seth happily said and also made his way in direction of the family room.

"They should really have a baby on their own." Marissa pretended to be annoyed, but could not hide the smile she had on her face. Secretly she did love the way her friends were about her Leah.

Cora nodded in agreement. "They should."

"I didn't mean it like that, Cora, " Marissa apologized, fearing what the younger girl would feel.

"No, I know. It's cool. I just agree with you. They would be so good with a baby."

Cora looked perfectly alright, and Marissa believed that she had actually been sincere. Sometimes she would forget that the girl was just fourteen years old, because she was incredibly wise and mature. "Yeah."

"They would make great parents," Cora stated with a smile.

Marissa made a nod and felt like this girl should know, since she had been spending a lot of time with Seth and Summer lately. "You like it being with them? I mean, I'm sure they've very cool."

"They are, actually. Not just the obvious good things, like my own room and bathroom and that house. I mean, they even get me new clothes and everything. And they don't even need to."

"They want to."

"Yeah, I know. I'm lucky. Summer's like my big sister and she's a really good listener, you know?" Marissa nodded, knowing the girl was right. "And Seth is so funny and great. Sometimes a little too overprotective though, but that's alright."

"I'm glad you like it there," Marissa sincerely said. She found it admiring that her best friends had just opened up their home, just like the Cohen's had done to Ryan.

Cora continued as they sat down on the couch. "You know, the other day, we were having pizza and watching a movie. And even though I know that I'm interfering with their private time, they never let it show. They just make me feel at home, and relaxed. And well, loved."

"They do love you," the older woman reassured Cora.

"I just wonder when they are going to get married. I know they will. They're, like, perfect for each other."

"You know, I think you're right. It's just a matter of time now before he pops the question."

"Yeah," Cora paused, suddenly a bit self-conscious. "Listen, I don't know why I told you all those things. But, just, don't tell anyone."

Marissa smiled and placed a hand on Cora's shoulder. "Of course not. But, thanks. For talking to me."

"Yeah, well, thanks for listening," Cora said, also with a smile on her face.

vvvvvvvvv

Seth carefully made his way to where Summer sat on the couch, her legs neatly pressed together. She was leaning over the cushions where Leah was sleeping, Summer's one hand clutched in the baby's small one while Summer's other stroked the baby's stomach.

"So adorable," Seth mumbled as he knelt down next to Summer, placing his hand on top of Summer's making her strokes stop.

A smile crept upon Summer's face but she kept her gaze fixed at the sleeping baby. "She is so adorable," she said in a whisper since she did not want to wake Leah.

Seth took Summer's hand, placing a soft kiss on her palm. _You're adorable_. He loved the way Summer got around Leah. She could just sit and watch the girl, or hold her, for hours. Always with this amazement on her face mixed with a smile.

Someday, he would watch her like this, and it would be their baby. There was nothing he wanted more. Just the thought of sharing his life with Summer, to marry her, and have a family with her, made his heart all warm. The present was amazing; with them being steady together and very much in love. But the future for them – beyond amazing.

While still holding her hand, Seth sat down next to her on the coach, their sides touching. He wondered if she would be freaked out if he would tell her about his plans and dreams and wishes for the two of them.

Would she find it strange that he thought about a wedding with her? How he could picture it in his mind; how she would be more beautiful than ever and how he already knew what he would like to tell her in his vows. Would she find it frightening that he imagined what their kids would look like? First they would have a girl, who would look just like Summer and be totally adorable. And then they would have a son, and their boy would be Summer's little baby boy and he would have curly hair that she would brush her fingers through. She would secretly love that hair, but complain to Seth for making their son have thick and curly hair impossible to comb.

Summer would be an amazing mom. Seth was sure of it. Not only because she was so in love with Leah, but also because she was incredible with Cora and it made him feel so proud of her. Summer would be the greatest mother, and their kids would love her.

Feeling an overwhelming love go through his body, Seth placed a tender kiss on Summer's cheek, whispering in her ear. "I love you."

Summer let her finger out from Leah's grip, sliding her arms around Seth's neck. "I love you, too." Their faces came close, and Summer let her nose graze against his in an Eskimo kiss. She giggled as he smiled and kissed the side of her face.

Someone cleared their throat, making the twosome separate from each other slightly. "Dinner's ready," Ryan uncomfortably said, most likely having been sent to get them rather than choosing it himself.

Summer stood up, but leant down to place a soft kiss on Leah's cheek before walking in direction of the kitchen. "She's beautiful, Ryan," she gently said as she went pass him, her hand brushing against his arm.

Ryan, a little surprised by Summer's softness, mumbled something in reply that she only smiled to before disappearing from the room, leaving the two brothers with Leah.

Seth also stood up. "Really, bro, you did good. She's something."

"So you guys keep telling me. But I know, she really is special." Ryan sat down on the spot where Summer just had been seated.

"Well, I'm happy for you, man," Seth said with a shrug, his voice sincere though.

Ryan smiled and rearranged the blanket over his daughter. "You'll have a baby someday, too. Not as perfect as mine of course, but I guess it'd be kind of cute."

Seth let out a laugh. "_Kind of cute_, Ryan? Are you kidding me, she'll be beyond cute."

Lifting his eyebrows, Ryan said, "she?"

"Well, or he. I imagine we'll have a girl first though," Seth simply said while watching his god daughter/niece sleep.

"As in you and Summer?"

Seth sat down in an armchair opposite his brother, rolling his eyes at the question he had just received. "Duh?"

"Sorry," Ryan apologetically said with a grin on his face. "Yeah. It would be great if Leah could have a cousin to play with."

"It would," the brunette dreamed.

"Have you guys talked about it? I mean, do you want to have a baby in the near future," Ryan asked, being used to ask Seth questions. He knew that his brother always wanted to talk about stuff, and if he did not ask questions Seth would tell him anyway, but accuse him of not being interested enough. So, therefore, Ryan did his best to look interested.

"No. I mean, we haven't really talked about it. I just think about it, a lot lately for obvious reasons. Summer's just so great with Leah."

Ryan had to agree with Seth; Summer had turned out to be a real baby person. "That, she is."

"But I want to marry her first. Do it the right way. No offense, bro," Seth continued, and realized that he had never really questioned that Ryan and Marissa were not married. It had been a lot with the pregnancy and birth of Leah that he guessed they just had not had the time to plan a wedding.

Ryan rolled his eyes. "Oh, none taken. So, you're thinking of proposing to her?"

"All the time."

"So, why don't you? You worried she would say no?"

Seth sighed, not exactly sure of the reason of why he had not asked Summer. He figured there were several reasons, bust most of all he was just scared. "I don't know. Maybe. I just don't want her to think I'm rushing things. Because things are awesome, Ryan. But, you know, I really want to marry her."

"That's awesome, man. You should ask her. I'm sure Summer will say yes. Don't worry. She loves you. I can tell just looking at the two of you."

Seth smiled. He knew Summer loved him. "Yeah. I know. She just makes me nervous, man."

"Just ask her, man," Ryan impatiently said, not in the mood to dwell on the reason of why Seth had not proposed or why he should not or what Summer may or may not say.

Seth looked up from his lap, giving his brother the best evil look he had. Which did not really look scary at all. "You're one to talk. You haven't popped the question to your lady yet."

"No, I haven't. But maybe I will."

Seth snorted and rolled his eyes yet again. "You're such a coward, bro."

"Me? I'm not the one who thinks about proposing _all the time_ but complaining about my girlfriend making me _nervous_," Ryan said with a hint of tease in his voice. Seth had always been so neurotic.

Standing up again, Seth brushed his hands against his pants, not really wanting to talk about it anymore. He did not even know himself what he was afraid of. "Whatever, bro. Let's go eat."

"Let's," Ryan said and lifted up Leah in his arms, walking towards the kitchen, Seth following behind.

"Summer," Seth exclaimed as he bumped into her around the corner, feeling his heart starting to race. Had she heard anything he and Ryan had talked about? "Wh- What are you doing here?"

Summer gave Seth a look he could not read, but placed a hand on his arm to stop him from talking. "I was wondering what you were doing, taking so long."

Seth nervously giggled. "Oh, you know, Ryan. Always loves to talk."

Summer laughed, both to Seth's words and to the fact that he was giggling. "Ryan needed to talk to you, right."

"That, he did." Seth had a feeling that his lie was not fully accepted by Summer. But Summer merely smiled, linking her arm through his. He was really adorable. And apparently, she made him nervous.

"Hey, Summer," Seth started anxiously and met her gaze. "You didn't hear what we were talking about, did you?"

_Yes_, Summer said quietly in her mind. She had heard some of it anyway, as she was going to go see what took them so long. She had stopped just outside the family room though, hearing the man she loved talk about wanting to marry her. Even though she hated it when people eavesdropped, she had been frozen just there, intently listening to the conversation between her boyfriend and his brother. Secretly, she wanted to marry him, too. Her answer would be yes if he was to ask her. "No, why," she innocently said, trying her best to hold her mask. "Anything good?"

"No, no reason." Seth walked her out to the patio, where the others were already seated. Summer sat down next to Cora, giving her a smile. Seth, his heart beats slowing down in his chest, merely sat down next to his girlfriend. God, she made him nervous sometimes.

As if she had noticed his state of mind, her hand found his on his thigh and she soothingly squeezed it with her own. The smile she gave him, one only saved for him, mixed with the look in her eyes though, made him relax. Maybe he would find the courage to ask her.

Summer had found it hard to let him love her in the beginning, and found it even harder to love him. Or admit that she did. He remembered when she had told him the first couple of times. She had been nervous and those words had meant so much. Now though, she was able to say those three words more often. They were never the couple to say them all the time, and just include them in every goodbye. When those words were uttered, they both wanted them to mean something.

And right now, her eyes were telling him that, that she loved him. No other person had ever made him feel like Summer did. Just a look from her made his knees weak and he felt like nothing else mattered but the two of them in that moment. Summer had the power to make him relax in every situation, and he could just gaze into her chocolate brown eyes eternally.

He could not take his eyes off of her, even though everyone had already started to eat and converse. It was as if she had him under a spell, her love made him that way.

Seth knew she meant it when she told him she loved him, and he knew that she believed him when he told her. Something he had had to struggle with in the beginning, showing her that he indeed meant his words. He loved her. And wanted to marry her.

Summer leant her head closer to Seth's, whispering in his ear, "Relax, baby. You're starting to make me nervous, looking at me like that."

Seth blinked, not knowing for how long he had been staring at her. "Sorry. It's just that, you're so beautiful."

She blushed to his words, feeling warmth spread through her body. He always had that impact over her, making her melt from the sincerity in his words. It made her wish that this intimate moment between them were not taking place in the middle of a family dinner. Because no matter how much she wanted to kiss him right now, she never felt comfortable being too intimate with Seth in front of other people. She would show him later, just how much she appreciated him and found him adorable. And how much she indeed did love him, and wanted to marry him, too.

As Summer smiled, a noticeable blush spreading on her face, and straightened her position in her chair Seth could tell that he would have to contain himself. So, he did his best effort to turn to the others, diving into the conversation. He had a constant smile on his face though, and it grew wider as he felt Summer absentmindedly play with his hand in her lap while she was talking to Kirsten and Cora.

Man, he was so in love with her.

vvvvvvvvv

Summer fell into Seth's arms as soon as they got through their front door, having wanted nothing more than to be impossibly close to him for the last couple of hours. They had left his parents house early and taken Cora home, since she was going to spend the weekend with her mother.

And finally, after what seemed like forever for both of them, they were home and alone and could touch. Like touch for real.

Seth lifted her up in his arms, feeling her legs link themselves around his waist as he started walking them over to the staircase. His lips were pressed against her neck and while she was busy tracing kisses along his jaw line, he felt her hands wander up his back, lifting his navy blue shirt along their way upwards. As her kisses neared his lips in a much too slow pace, he changed his grip of her, his hands travelling up her thighs causing her skirt to ride up. He grinned as he felt her respond to his touch, her hips slightly grinding against his. And then her lips finally met his, and he felt her hands go around his neck, pushing him close to her.

Gracing her lips against his, she dipped her tongue into his warm and inviting mouth, tangling it together with his. His touch made her dizzy and she had no track of time, but suddenly she felt soft cushions against her back and realized that they had reached their bed.

Not once breaking the kiss, Summer reached her arms around his back, pulling him down on top of her, not able to be close enough to him. Her hands quickly found their way in between them, starting to work on the buttons of his shirt.

As the need of oxygen forced Seth to pull away, he found her hand and took over her task unbuttoning the shirt. She smiled and moaned as she felt his tongue contact with her collarbone, his hand pulling a strap of her dress off of her shoulder, exposing more skin for Seth to worship with kisses. His mouth traced kisses all the way along her collarbone to her shoulder and she sighed as it made her feel completely relaxed and dizzy. Shivers went through her whole body as his hands travelled south along her waist and hip, only to stay on her thigh just where her dress ended.

For a moment they both stilled and Seth looked down at her where she laid, her dark wavy hair spread out over the pillow and her skin slightly pink from her arousal. Her eyes were dark and sparkling and she smiled, carefully lifting her body slightly and pushing his shirt down his arms. He kept his eyes locked with hers, his breath ragged, as he felt her arms go down his sides to lift his undershirt over his head.

The shirt went over his head and broke the intense eye contact, and when Seth felt Summer's hands caress his bare chest up and down, he crushed his lips against hers again. Summer pulled herself even more upwards, one arm around his neck while her other gripped the fabric on her dress. She leaned her weight to him and made them roll around, so that he was pressed down against the bed and she straddled his upper thighs. She kissed him once again and then sat up, crossing her arms around her chest, bringing her green dress over her head. Carelessly she dropped it on the flood beside the bed and placed her hands on Seth's chest, closing the distance between their bodies yet again.

Seth welcomed her exposed body, finding her incredibly sexy in just her matching black bra and underwear with her brown waves of hair falling over her shoulders. His hands instantly found their place on each side of her delicate waist, his thumbs brushing the sensitive skin causing her to shiver.

Her breath was hot on his cheek, tickling him slightly but at the same time making him moan into her hair. Dropping several kisses onto his face and his awaiting lips, Summer pressed her chest against his, feeling his arms go around her back. His right hand went to her hair, digging through its thickness to lightly massage her scalp while his left hand went to the clasp of her bra.

They kept their position for a few moments, concentrating on the movement of their lips, tongues twirling together. But as Summer's leg pressed against him and the growing member in his pants became more evident, Summer pulled away. First she pulled the straps of her bra down her arms and removed the piece of cloth, and before Seth's hands could touch her she moved to sit on the side of him. While Seth stroked her lower waist and abdomen, Summer started working on the buckle of his pants. Slowly and with only one hand since her other was caressing his waist, she unbuckled the pants, consciously brushing against him a few times causing him to moan.

As she made an effort to pull his pants down, he reached out for her, pulling her down on his side and again capturing her lips with his. It was just a short kiss though, because he also seemed to be eager to remove the clothes remaining. Reaching up slightly to pull his clothes off, he felt Summer shift on the bed so that she was laying on the spot his body had just left. Happy to have her underneath him again, Seth leaned down over her, kissing her chest as he laced his fingers under the fabric of her underwear, pulling them down her legs.

vvvvvvvvv

"Hey, Cohen," Summer softly said as she absentmindedly traced circles on his chest, her face buried into the crook of his neck.

Seth made a 'hmm' sound and continued to lightly caress her bare hip with his thumb. He seldom felt as content as in moments like this, late at night in their bedroom, their naked bodies tangled together.

Summer placed a kiss on Seth's neck before leaning up on one elbow, resting her body against his chest while looking into his eyes. She reached her hand up to gently caress his cheek, finding him gaze up at her with such love. He was beautiful like this, when he was completely exposed and it was just the two of them. She leaned down to place a tender kiss on his lips, brushing his lip with her fingers as she pulled away while locking eyes with him again.

He did not say anything, and she silently thanked him for it. All she needed was that smile he gave her; it made her calm and warm inside. She felt love, happiness, reassurance. She trusted him completely.

"I want to marry you," she whispered and kept her gaze on him.

His smile widened and turned into a big grin, and he tucked some hair behind Summer's ear. "I want to marry you, too."

"Good," Summer whispered and leaned down to kiss him again. He responded to the kiss, stroking her back lovingly.

While pulling away so that their lips were only millimeters apart, Seth grinned. "Hey, you so heard me and Ryan talking."

"Maybe," Summer mischievously whispered as he laughed, his hands cupping her face. As she met his gaze and he noticed the seriousness in her eyes, he turned quiet though. "Why were you afraid to ask me," Summer softly asked.

Seth, not late to notice the vulnerability she showed, caressed her cheeks with his thumbs soothingly. "Because. I don't know. I didn't want to ruin things." His voice was calm and sincere, but she could sense that he also was a bit nervous.

"Ruin things," she asked while bringing a hand up to play with his hair. She wanted him to share his thoughts with her, and be able to let her in completely. They had from the beginning talked a lot, and Seth had made her open up to him. Summer wanted to do the same for him, that he would be able to talk to her about anything.

Seth struggled to find the right words. "Yeah. Well, I didn't want to rush things."

"You think it's too soon?"

"No. Not at all," Seth decisively said, placing a kiss on her nose as if to reassure her that he definitely wanted to marry her and had not hesitated to ask her for that reason. "But I was afraid that maybe you would think so," he added with a shrug, breaking their eye contact for a short moment.

Summer smiled, and forced his gaze to hers again. "You're cute." She caressed his cheek with the outside of her hand and shifted slightly on the bed.

Letting her change her position, so that it was her back resting against the bed and him leaning up on his elbow to look into her eyes, he smiled. He looked at her for a few moments before he gently kissed her and then lay down his head on her chest, taking her one hand into his own, kissing her palm.

Summer relaxed to their new position and wrapped her free arm around his back, resting it on the back of his neck. "I love you for being concerned about me like that."

"Huh," Seth said as he let their hands rest against Summer's stomach, his face resting just over her heart so that he could hear her heartbeats.

Summer rolled her eyes, but continued, not wanting this moment to be ruined by some joke. "You said you were afraid to ask me, because you didn't know if I was ready."

"Yeah. I was just afraid that it would scare you, you know? And I love you too much for that." Seth kept his head rested against her chest, but brought her hand up to his face, kissing it softly.

Summer sighed, sort of understanding what he was feeling. "Cohen, nothing could scare me away from you. I love you, and I trust you. I really want to be with you. Don't you know that," she quietly asked, afraid that he might not know that.

Seth leaned up and kissed her chin, pulling her close to him, his arms hugging her to his chest as he lay down on his side. "Oh, I do know that, Summer. I love you, too. And I trust you."

"I know that a lot of things have freaked me out in the past," Summer said into his neck, her voice trembling slightly. "But it won't anymore. Cohen. You fixed that. You fixed me."

Pulling her even closer to him, Seth placed a lingering kiss onto her forehead. "I love you so much, Summer."

Summer smiled into his neck, feeling so safe and content in his arms. "You fixed me, Cohen," she whispered again and felt her eyes starting to water. She was not even sure why as a single tear fell down her cheek, but she did know that she never had loved a person more than in this moment.

Seth noticed her tears against his skin and pulled her up to his level, meeting her teary eyes. She smiled though and he could tell that she was not sad. Capturing her lips in his, he tenderly kissed her until they both were out of breath. He pecked her lips one more time before laying them down again, her head resting on his shoulder. "For the record, Summer, I didn't fix you. You did it yourself. If you want to call it that, fix." Seth stroked her hair and continued before she got a chance to say something. "I see it like this, okay. You and I were both lost, Summer. And we weren't happy. But then we found each other, and together we grew happy."

Summer's lips curved into a big smile as he spoke, and she let out a happy sigh as he finished. "That sounds kinda nice."

"It does." He kissed her hair, leaning his head to rest on top of hers. "And since I now know how you feel, I'm not afraid anymore. I'm sorry I ever was."

Nodding against his shoulder Summer spoke. "It's okay. I don't blame you."

"So, one of these days I might propose. Like for real."

"I don't think I have ever been this in love with you, Seth Cohen." Summer turned around in his arms, a beaming smile on her face. "For real." And with those words Summer pressed herself against him, her lips finding his again, her hands cupping his face.

Life was beyond good.

THE END


End file.
